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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is low! And to feel hurt/confused

398 replies

Whatthe1 · 03/02/2019 12:10

So I have made a new (ish) friend (known for about 9months or so. We got on really well and it DC do too (met in school). Anyway we are currently planning on building a house and it’s all very exciting for us. We met up on Friday eve and she asked how plans were going. I told her and conversation led on. She got to the point of asking me which bank we were getting our mortgage from as lending here at the moment is difficult. I said we weren’t as we were hoping to self fund. She asked how?? I said that we had profit from our last house and some investments we were going to cash in. She then outwardly REFUSED to believe it!! Stating that at our age she couldn’t see how it was possible esp as we had two DC. I didn’t know how to respond so I just said, oh look it’s not important let’s talk about something else. The rest of the visit was ok but she was a little “off”

Anyway today I got the following message
Whatthe,
I have been In turmoil since Friday, I can’t understand why you would lie to my face about finances the way you did. I feel like either way I can’t continue being friends. If you are lying like I BELIEVE you are or whether you actually have THAT kind of money. I didn’t think you were one of those ‘money is no object people’ so unfortunately I can’t be around that. Sorry I really enjoy your company and you are a great new friend but this just doesn’t sit with me’

I haven’t responded as I am I shock I think! What the hell?? Do you think I should call or just leave her be? I AM DUMBFOUNDED 😮

OP posts:
flumpybear · 04/02/2019 09:23

Wow what a fruit loop!

Claudia1980 · 04/02/2019 09:33

She is completely Cray Cray!! Lots of weirdos out there.

FrancisCrawford · 04/02/2019 09:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsJane · 04/02/2019 10:07

She sounds batshit!

How was the school run OP??

Jellycat1 · 04/02/2019 10:20

You couldn't make it up could you. Definitely her problem. Please update!

ChasedByBees · 04/02/2019 10:31

Wow. If your children are friends though I’d try and keep it cool but polite for their sake.

OnlineAlienator · 04/02/2019 10:33

It's just plain weird, she clearly has issues, nothing about it makes sense! Move on. Its not you, its her.

Member984815 · 04/02/2019 10:37

This is why I never talk about money, I hope the school run went ok and good luck with your new home

Original poster
Whatthe1 · 04/02/2019 10:52

School run was fairly uneventful in that she stayed in her car and let her Dc go in themselves (which she never does) so I get the feeling she is avoiding me 🤷‍♀️

OP posts:
FrancisCrawford · 04/02/2019 11:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Whatthe1 · 04/02/2019 11:13

I am now wondering if she had a couple of glasses of wine before she text??🤔😂

OP posts:
FrancisCrawford · 04/02/2019 11:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ItsMEhooray · 04/02/2019 11:21

Just say my finances are a personal matter and I'm not sure why you would think otherwise.

Parthenope · 04/02/2019 11:28

Gosh, that's funny.

The real oddity is that she can't quite decide whether she's outraged because you are lying to her about how much money you have, or whether she's outraged because you're not lying to her about how much money you have. But she's definitely outraged. Or 'in turmoil'. Grin

Bluntness100 · 04/02/2019 11:30

Yes, I'd guess she's embarrassed, maybe it was drunk texting, maybe someone else has told her she's well out of line, like her partner, or maybe she's seen this thread.

But the whole, I can't be around you if you have more money than me is some seriously fucked up stuff.

On the other hand, maybe she is so fucked Up, she stayed in the car to avoid you as she thinks she's in the right.

IncrediblySadToo · 04/02/2019 11:59

I don’t know about a couple of glasses 🍷🍷. Inherited fucking bonkers more like it.

Has DH recovered from being twatted with the frying pan? When he does, ask him who else should be avoided!

Your comment to her warranted nothing more than ‘Oh, that would be great. It’ll be lovely if you can be mortgage free, but even if you do end up borrowing some, at least it’ll still be a tiny mortgage’.

I’m sorry though, it’s always upsetting to find out someone’s not who you thought they were 💐

I’d be wary having the child around though, too much drama. Poor kid though.

CoraPirbright · 04/02/2019 12:05

I have to say I am pretty surprised that she didn’t respond to your message. Perhaps she has blocked you. Would you know? Do you know if she has seen/read your reply?

Bluntness100 · 04/02/2019 12:22

I'm not surprised she's not responded, there really isn't much she can say.

FlamingJuno · 04/02/2019 12:28

She hasn't responded because she has made her position clear. She doesn't want to be friends with you because either you're a liar or you've got more money than her Hmm. You're well rid, but it's a shame you're hurt.

bumbleymummy · 04/02/2019 12:36

Shock How totally bizarre.

ShowMeTheKittens · 04/02/2019 17:28

Oh love. She is jealous.
Dump her, she is a nasty person. I have had 'friends' like that... they lie in wait. There are a lot of people who cannot be happy for others.
Just block her.

Pk37 · 04/02/2019 17:31

I would just reply “you clearly have issues .. your loss. Byyeeee

Rtruth · 04/02/2019 17:32

I’d just go back and say you didn’t think that the money you have/don’t have was any reason to be friends or not. Say your disappointed that she would base her friendships on that and that if that’s her decision then fair enough.

loz85 · 04/02/2019 17:33

Think you’re well rid if that’s the sort of “friend” she is! Jealousy is such an ugly trait and I really hope she’s on here and sees this friend and the opinion of other netmums about her behaviour 😂

Giraffey1 · 04/02/2019 17:36

She sounds very overinvested in your financial arrangements. Very odd - I think you are well rid.