how would you feel if a man did this?

[brizzledrizzle]

Would you be offended or flattered if a man wolf whistled at you?

I really dislike it. It's always done by an ugly bastard as well.

Offended. Also, slightly nervous depending on circumstances.

Whistling is gross and territorial and aggressive. If you want to signal to a woman that you are appreciating her style/attractiveness/whatever a smile will do fine.

At my age, i would think he was whistling at someone else.

I never cared when they did but didn't acknowledge it either.

I'm afraid to say I have never been in the least offended by this.

In the context of other obscenities I've endured from groups of men walking behind me or lone drunk men later at night, it seems completely innocuous.

I find it very flattering and it really makes my day.
Some of the misandric comments on this thread are really shocking but not surprising.

I have always hated it. Mostly on the receiving end when younger and prettier and men were treating me as a piece of meat. It started from age 12. I don’t hear it these days (now 39). I hate that men do this to young girls who are vulnerable. It never made me feel good about myself.

All you have to do if this happens is turn around and say “wahey alright mate! Come on let’s do it! Come down here and get your todger out!” I guarantee they won’t say another word

I’d not be offended, and secretly flattered. Although I know I shouldn’t be. I think I’ve just grown up to make the best of it!

I used to get really embarrassed and uncomfortable when I was younger, now I’d just be confused.

No, I think it's disgusting behaviour

I’ve been out with my adult daughter and men think it’s okay to nudge each other; look her up and down; wolf whistle and make lewd comments. I usually give a stern look. Once, when particularly disgusted, I challenged this dirtbag (who looked as if he had a daughter of similar age) and was told I was a jealous, old boot.

It is intended to intimidate women. I do worry about the women who think it is to do with attraction. Such disrespectful behaviour being considered flattering makes me question boundaries and standards.

The other day I passed a building site when a bunch of (idiot) men were throwing scaffolding poles into a pickup in a manner very dangerous to passers by. One chap shouted, ‘ Oi! Watch out for the beautiful lady!’ Since I am 62 and virtually unintimidatable these days. I suggested that he should have gone to Specsavers.

It was all very good natured and good humoured. Nobody died.

Intimidation by men of women is not acceptable. A bit of banter surely is.

A bit of friendly banter is fine. There's a building site by DH's work that I have to go past every day to pick up the car.

The men there are are typical examples of the type, but they're perfectly friendly, considerate and pretty much just go about their business.

You're happy to make eye contact, smile, say hello, thanks if they made way for you, whatever. Because they're not rude arseholes trying to make anyone feel stupid.

It's perfectly possible - some knuckle-draggers just choose to be dicks.

So what about all the reports of shouting at girls who are 12 or 13? Does anyone think that's okay? It makes them uncomfortable and feel intimidated. Is that something that's 'just banter and part of society' and they should have to get used to? Is it okay to shout sexual remarks at older women, which are clearly intended to be sarcastic effort offensive.

It's not friendly banter is it! It's usually aimed at those who are very young or older and likely to be intimidated. No-one can say the wolf whistlers only whistle at confident and unperturbed adult women because it's just not true.

Therefore it is upsetting to some groups it's not acceptable, simple.

Who here would want their 13 year old daughter O her way home alone to be faced with a group of men looking at them and shouting comments? I can't believe anyone would decide that was flattering.

I find it very flattering and it really makes my day.

So I take it you also make a point of whistling at every semi-attractive young man you pass on the street? Just to 'make his day'?

It’s not a compliment, it’s derogatory at best and is a sure way to make a solo female feel targeted and vulnerable. No man with basic decency and manners would do it.

I wouldn't give a shit. I wouldn't even turn around, so I'm another in the not flattered, not offended camp.

I remember my mum (well into her forties but slim and well dressed) being wolf whistled at by a workman on scaffolding.When I asked her why he did it she said drily "To get my attention. He wouldn't do it if he saw me close up"

I digress but I have a story ...the best I ever saw was in NYC. Half a dozen guys digging up the road. A woman comes past 6 ft tall an amazon with a glorious mane of hair, I defy anyone to say she wasn't a bit special. So special I actually didn't hear any comments (I think they were speechless) but it was obvious the lads were getting an eyeful. As she passes she turns and says "ok guys have you had your fill?" Imagine in a broad NY accent. They went back to digging up the road. She strode on. It was a moment

I have never been offended, I definitely have never been intimated or ever thought that was the intended purpose of the whistle nor have I ever been flattered.

I don’t think I’ve ever been wolf whistled at ! This doesn’t make me sad it makes me relieved. There’s a young woman in my office aged 18, she is model-beautiful and I think she must get unwanted attention everywhere she goes. It must be really draining and I feel glad I’m pretty invisible.

NothingOnTellyAgain makes the best point on this thread - do gay men wolf whistle and catcall 14 year old boys or men in the street? No, no they don't.
It's not a men being complimentary thing, it's a men seeing girls and women as targets thing.
It's ok to sexually harass us in public, but not boys and men.
If it were a simple compliment straight men would wolf whistle other good looking blokes and boys. They don't, because they bloody well know it can be threatening and they don't fancy getting a punch for it. Women and girls aren't a threat, so they feel free to assert themselves over our comfort.
And obvs NAMALT. Duh.