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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think this is so sad

334 replies

Charlie97 · 01/02/2019 12:33

Newborn baby found in a park last night, my heart breaks for both mother and baby.

I know I would not wanted to give birth alone (I presume mum was alone) and without pain relief and medical help.

Baby found abandoned in freezing East Ham park

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-47083204

OP posts:
Original poster
Charlie97 · 01/02/2019 13:28

@thatsmyspace yes it could've died, to be brutally honest the mother could've ensured that happened. But the baby was safe and well and obviously found quickly which would make me think that whoever left the baby maybe saw the approaching dog walker?

OP posts:
thatsmyspace · 01/02/2019 13:31

@ILoveMaxiBondi yes I'm stupid for having a heart and feeling more sympathy for the baby than the person that dumped it 🙄

ILoveMaxiBondi · 01/02/2019 13:32

Actually you don’t seem to have a heart. That’s the issue. You seem totally unable to see beyond the end of your own nose.

Original poster
Charlie97 · 01/02/2019 13:35

@thatsmyspace you certainly lack insight with what the mother could be suffering.

OP posts:
thatsmyspace · 01/02/2019 13:36

It's a funny old world. If it had of been a puppy that was dumped there would be uproar and the person responsible would be scum/sick/ deserves to die. But when it's a baby, a tiny human being that's just been born and dumped then it's a different case and it's fine because it was found and is doing well regardless of how it got there. 😬

Original poster
Charlie97 · 01/02/2019 13:38

@thatsmyspace don't be ridiculous it's not that simple! That is a stupid comparison.

OP posts:
JacquesHammer · 01/02/2019 13:39

If it had of been a puppy that was dumped there would be uproar and the person responsible would be scum/sick/ deserves to die

Yes because the two situations are absolutely comparable Hmm

I can’t feel anything but desperate sympathy for the poor woman involved.

Yabbers · 01/02/2019 13:39

There is a whole world of difference between someone dumping a puppy and a woman having just given birth leaving a baby.

In the vast majority of cases, someone dumping a puppy has a whole lot of options which are easy to think about and find.

A woman in turmoil, likely with MH issues, perhaps at risk from a partner or family, or a young girl terrified her parents will find out isn’t exactly thinking straight.

But well done you @thatsmyspace for being perfect and lucky you never having found yourself in a situation you just couldn’t deal with.

Oddsocksandmeatballs · 01/02/2019 13:42

It is a sad situation all round, no-one knows what the mother was going through and how scared/unwell she must be.

brownmare · 01/02/2019 13:43

The difference with puppies and babies is that there are rescue centres especially for animals; we tend not to have designated places for babies to be just left, we can't know the age, mental capacity or personal situation of the mother. I think it's incredibly sad that a mother felt the need to abandon her child.

LostInShoebiz · 01/02/2019 13:48

No one does something like this and goes on to have a happy and carefree life of delights. Poor woman must have been utterly desperate or in a situation entirely beyond her control.

ILoveMaxiBondi · 01/02/2019 13:50

Yep. I was right.

thatsmyspace · 01/02/2019 13:51

Only one person in my eyes deserves sympathy and that is that baby who will grow up most probably in care and will one day learn how they got there. A tiny defenceless baby out in the cold. In a bag. Wrapped in a towel. What a way to start your life!

Maybe i sound so cold because I don't understand it.or have never met anyone who has had to do that. I think we should have those baby boxes that America have where you can leave your baby safe.

Josico58 · 01/02/2019 13:52

So, so sad.

I'm sorry but to the posters saying it's OK to leave the baby in a park, one poster even said "a reasonable degree of care", are you mad? IMO this is no worse than attempted murder, or manslaughter at best.

Whoever it was disposing of the baby (yes, disposing!), whether that was the mother or someone else, they knew full well it could have frozen to death. If they cared in the slightest they would have made a small effort to leave it somewhere it would be warm and found immediately! Even if that is on someone's doorstep after ringing the bell and running away.

Shocking and so so sad. The poor, poor girl that will grow up to find out this is how she was treated by the person that brought her into the world.

JacquesHammer · 01/02/2019 13:54

Only one person in my eyes deserves sympathy and that is that baby who will grow up most probably in care and will one day learn how they got there

I can’t imagine going through life with a finite limit of sympathy.

VioletCharlotte · 01/02/2019 13:55

This is so sad. I feel terribly sorry for the mother. She just have been in a terrible state mentally to abandon her baby like that. Possibly she was very young and terrified what her parents would say. Maybe she has severe mental health issues. Who are we to judge? I just hope the little baby survives and is well looked after, and the Mum comes forward and gets all the help she needs.

JacquesHammer · 01/02/2019 13:55

are you mad

No. But we’re emotionally intelligent enough to acknowledge how desperate a situation the mother must have been in.

bobstersmum · 01/02/2019 13:55

Someone doing that must be under tremendous pressure or in very poor mental health. If the mother were a very young girl herself then she would have been terrified.

Original poster
Charlie97 · 01/02/2019 13:59

Maybe i sound so cold because I don't understand it.or have never met anyone who has had to do that.

You sound dreadfully cold and I doubt many people in the world has met these desperate women, which is why they are so desperate.

OP posts:
birdladyfromhomealone · 01/02/2019 14:03

A young girl in my DH village left her newborn in the woods back in the 80s.
The girl spent 2 years in jail for manslaughter.

thatsmyspace · 01/02/2019 14:06

@Charlie97 yes but not towards babies and children. Adults yes. There's safer ways to leave your baby. You'd have to heartless to dump it out in the cold. If a parent did this to a their 1/2/3 ect a lynching would be called for. This is no different in my eyes. It's a human being, that could of died.

Clinicalwaste · 01/02/2019 14:08

Left at night freezing temperatures. Found by chance that night after 10. The baby is really lucky to be found and alive. Whoever left the baby is guilty of attempted murder.

JacquesHammer · 01/02/2019 14:09

yes but not towards babies and children. Adults yes. There's safer ways to leave your baby

How do you know the mother isn’t a child?

You'd have to heartless to dump it out in the cold

No. You have to be desperate. Or at risk. Or ill.

If a parent did this to a their 1/2/3 ect a lynching would be called for. This is no different in my eyes. It's a human being, that could of died

Really? Why do you keep coming up with “comparisons” that are nonsensical?

JacquesHammer · 01/02/2019 14:10

Whoever left the baby is guilty of attempted murder

Really? You think there was preparation and specific intent to cause death?

LordVoldetort · 01/02/2019 14:11

I guess the reason for leaving a baby in such a place is to go undetected (cctv in hospital etc will identify the person)
I would like to think that most people would try and do what is right by their kids even if it’s so totally wrong (like leaving a baby in the park)
I would think the mother must be in a horrible circumstance or probably not of a healthy mind to have done this. Sadly the mum will probably not be found unless she requires medical attention and even then if she does there could be someone blocking her from getting the help she needs

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