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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if you love your DP or DC more?

330 replies

MamaDane · 29/01/2019 21:56

Sorry if this question offends in any way or if it's painfully obvious.

Thing is, I'm pregnant (FTM) and in a relationship with the love of my life.

And I keep wondering how it would be possible to love my kids more than my partner.

I see my partner as my soulmate and the kids with eventually move out and have their own lives, where again it will just be the two of us, growing old together.

Anyone still with their DP and love them more?

Or still with DP and love their child/-ren the most?

OP posts:
WatcherOfTheNight · 31/01/2019 11:15

"I love them completely differently. If DH died, I would be absolutely heartbroken. But I don’t think I could actually carry on living in a world that didn’t have my DS in it."

This .

It's so true .
Sorry to be blunt but I would gladly give my life or DHs to have my DD back ,as would he .
We've been together 26 years,known each other much longer.
Living without her is destroying us ,it's constant excruciating pain .

We do our best, we have too as we still have a young Ds who is also suffering so much without his Sister.
Without him ,neither of us would be willing to go on without her .

Many parents in our situation say the same ,it's only for our children we don't give up .

genericmumsy · 31/01/2019 12:50

DC!
My DH would want me to choose him.
He's never been able to bear the thought that I could love DD more than him, so.. I can't admit to it : ^)
It also bothers me that he loves me more than DD but whatever. So long as he never hurts her, I won't have to hurt him!

Drogosnextwife · 31/01/2019 15:06

Yes genericmumsy, my dp tells me he loves me more than the kids, I refuse to believe that.

Drogosnextwife · 31/01/2019 15:22

. But what if your child turns out to be someone who raped and murdered a child? Became a drug addict and repeatedly attacked and stole from you? I

I could disown my child for the first thing but I wpuld still love for the child I raised. The second example, I wpuld just do my best to help them. I've seen addiction first hand and it make people change, but if they were only hurting themselves and me then I could forgive them.

minglemoo · 31/01/2019 15:49

Ah dont worry. You will love your dc but it's a different kind of love. I know why you asked.

toddman70 · 31/01/2019 15:54

Been together 28 years married 25 years with one son whose 20. For me, my answer would be I love my wife more than our son. She will always come first in my family relationship, but if I had to guess her response would be the opposite.

ethelfleda · 31/01/2019 15:59

I’d be scared to ask myself this question and answer it truthfully to be honest.

So I’ll chicken out and say it is different. Someone upthread said it’s almost feral how you feel for your children - it’s biological and innate and something you almost can’t control. I’m so unbelievably in love with my son and feel so fiercely protective over him... which is how Mother Nature intended to carry on the human race I guess!

ethelfleda · 31/01/2019 15:59

And congrats on your pregnancy Smile

Longdistance · 31/01/2019 16:05

The list goes like this....
Dc
My car
Dh
🤣 poor guy

FridgeFullOfChocolate · 31/01/2019 16:18

My children. The love for your children is off the scale. It’s completely different to a romantic kind of love. I love my husband very much and care about him a lot, but the love for our children is more intense, it’s a I would die for you kind of love.

LightDrizzle · 31/01/2019 16:23

DC, but now that one is adult and independent, I’d prefer to live with DH over adult children, but I love them unconditionally and viscerally. My love for DH isn’t unconditional although it is deep and I would support him though hard times.

blackcat86 · 31/01/2019 16:23

What a horrible question. I would like to think that are one equal family unit who love and care for each other. If it came to it in a gun to your head, Sophie's choice way then it would be DC without question. I would hope that would be what DH would want me to do and would do the same If it came to it.

CatsPawsAndWhiskers · 31/01/2019 16:38

Odd question, but...

I agree with blackcat86. We all love each other as a family unit. If any one of us wasn't there any more, life would be shit.
Obviously the love you feel for a partner is different to the love you have for your children. We feel a responsibility and protectiveness for our children because they are only here because of us. I don't think that will ever disappear. Someone above said that their partner would like her to love him more than their child. That makes me feel sick. It's not a competition between partner and children and if it ever was, then I would think less of my partner. I had a father like that and he was a possessive, jealous person who I no longer have contact with.

smallchanceofrain · 31/01/2019 17:04

My love for my DC is unconditional and I would die for them. It's a kind of instinctive thing that's hard to describe.

My love for DH is conditional on him being honest, faithful, loving, kind and trying reasonably hard to act like a grown up.

Strokethefurrywall · 31/01/2019 17:19

DC every single time.

I love my DH of course, but that love is dependent on both of us working at our marriage, being considerate of each other and choosing every day to be together.

My love for my two sons is incomparable. I don't get a say over whether I love them or not, it is a biological drive that means I could never, ever hurt them. They grew inside me. The biological urge I have to protect them is totally animal and instinctive, just like my biological urge to reproduce. The idea of someone else hurting them, or something dreadful happening to them makes me want to hyperventilate. I would take a bullet for them, of course I would. And I know full well that DH would do the same.

I absolutely love my DH, but I definitely can live without him. I just choose not to.

When we lost my younger brother (he was 28), my parents were understandably distraught and both of them wished it was them that died in his place.

couchparsnip · 31/01/2019 17:26

DC without question and DH would say the same thing.
If either one died I would never be the same again. If DH died I would be heartbroken but would eventually move on.

ChiefSpoon · 31/01/2019 19:59

DC without a doubt

BlackberryandNettle · 31/01/2019 21:26

DC and I love DH like mad. The love for kids is protective, I wonder if that's why it feels stronger. It's just different.

BlackberryandNettle · 31/01/2019 21:28

Just realized my post is ambiguous! Love DC more strongly despite loving DH like mad.

thisgirlwantsmore · 31/01/2019 21:31

Was only thinking about this today, I once met someone who said DH, and I've never forgot (was about 10yrs ahi before I had Dc and even then I found it amazing). Still do, DC every single day. I am their world and they are mine, they come before anything

TheDowagerCuntess · 31/01/2019 22:13

He's never been able to bear the thought that I could love DD more than him

To me, this seems so needy and pathetic, and it would make me love him even less.

In fact, my visceral reaction to this is so strong that it almost makes my skin crawl. 😬

FuzzyShadowChatter · 01/02/2019 00:22

It's just too different to compare and I agree the nature of the question doesn't really work; however, my first reaction at reading the thread title was my spouse. It's been interesting reading through. I agree that it's creepy and controlling to say that someone should love you more, but none of the arguments has really changed my mind, as much I'm likely overthinking this as the nerd I am.

I might be unbelievable or unnatural or shiver-inducing or maybe from seeing my own mother and many other mothers I've known and the many threads on here that seem quite good evidence that not every mother has the intensity described - plenty of good and bad mothers do and plenty of good and bad mothers don't - and that feral protectiveness can come from places that are not love (personally, I do not associate the two and do struggle a bit to understand the many who do) has altered my perceptions. Maybe having only seen and tried to care for others who've gone through the loss of a spouse and child & seen the devastation in both, I underestimate the difference the major impact would have on me that I do not think either would be easier or that my grief would be greater than those who already live with that and more every day. I know more than a few who never recovered or 'moved on' after the loss of a spouse and it's odd to me to assume it would be as easier. Or maybe I just have a different perspective or definitions of love, paternal, romantic, and otherwise.

Really, I'm not sure if I believe that truly unconditional love exists. The closest I've seen is my spouse's for me and between some other couples far more than I've ever seen between parent and child, even for myself. Yes, my kids are my priority, I hope the best for them and I would die and kill for them - as I would for my spouse and maybe a couple of my friends, not for my parents or most people - but I'll admit to having boundaries and conditional lines that I cannot see a way back from. Maybe it's because I still have some anger with family members who kept loving and ferally protecting people who literally threatened and tried to end the lives of others, I hope by all in the universe that's never me. To me, loving a memory of someone I once cared for is not the same as loving someone who has gone too far from that person.

Even after reading the thread and having gone through rough patches with my spouse where we discussed the logistics of separating, I still say my spouse. Yeah, the worst could happen and he could leave or die or commit some horrible crime, but even if I moved on in the sense of continuing my life or loving someone else, the impact he's had on my life isn't something I can move on from - guy has saved my life repeatedly, even though my many many fuckups, and we've stood together through a lot shit. I plan my future with him, building and seeing each other's dreams come true and making each other happy - most of that does not really involve our kids.

If the worst - death or unforgivable crime which are both as much a possibility with my kids as it is for my spouse - doesn't happen, my kids will leave as adults and they could leave and never return just as I did to my parents. I accept that as a possible future reality, it's a reality that many parents - good and bad - have had to accept as much as hopefully most of us would like more in the hopeful future where our kids all turn out great. It would take far more for me to be happy with accepting that future between me and my spouse.

To me, that difference is what fuels my gut reaction - as important as they are to me and as much as I do and would do for them because of that, I foresee a future where I'll live happily without them in my day to day life, where they will not be such a large part of my world nor do I want even now to be theirs - I want their worlds to be bigger than I could even in my wildest dreams be, and my wildest dreams involve my spouse. Even if that makes me odd.

qumquat · 01/02/2019 02:33

DC, no question. But a lot of people are talking about falling in love when they first saw their babies. Don't be upset if this doesn't happen for you. I thought there was something wrong with me when I didn't feel that 'rush of love' people talk about. Then I had a terrible time breastfeeding and it was hard for me to view her as anything other than a miniature torture device. But it was love that meant I was willing to torture myself to feed her (idiotic though it was - still traumatised 5 years on and can't face another DC as a result). I wouldn't put myself through that for anyone else. So I guess I'm saying it's not necessarily a 'happy' love, it's much more primal, although the more positive aspects of it do come along eventually. I only stopped regretting having her when she was 18 months, but I would have still died for her from day one.

SimplySteve · 01/02/2019 06:55

DC. I feel a different kind of love for them. A different bond. I include D(S)S in this. I've been required to save DPs life hundreds of times in our time together, but even this hasn't changed the way I think about this.

Although I think love is too simplistic a term. My children have always been subconsciously given every fibre of my being, unconditionally, and always shall be. Leaving them both with medical staff post general anaesthetic administration are memories etched in my mind, even thinking back causes the same feelings of anguish, handwringing, and utter despair. Walking from that room are the strongest feelings, with birth the opposite, elative, end of the scale, I've ever experienced.

hiptobeasquare · 01/02/2019 07:18

DC. We adopted my eldest at 6 months and from the first moment I met him I loved him more than my husband. He was the best thing about my life until I gave birth to my DD. They are equally the loves of my life. I would sacrifice my husband anytime to keep them from harm.
And I love my husband deeply.