To ask about the worst wedding you’ve been too

[Whereisthecoffee]

I’m planning mine and I could just ask for tips but instead I’m going to procrastinate and read stories.
Please share your stories !

MaisyPops

Fingerprints?!

Was it some kind of sting for a family of criminals?!

Make sure people are sat with others they know, you can never have too much food or drink, be relaxed and ensure there's some good tunes to get people up and dancing. If you can do the above, people will have a good time.

Yes, I think sometimes it’s the venue. The bride and groom may pay for a buffet for 80 and get something cold and measly. That isn’t their fault.

I think sometimes the bride and groom focus their spending on the wrong thing though, a 4000 pound dress but one canapé per guest. Also they need to consider their location and timings, a castle in the Scottish highlands may be beautiful, but perhaps not very considerate if most of your family are London based.

Fusioluxe
It was a guestbook frame thing with a tree on it and everyone had to use the inks to make fingerprint leaves on the tree and sign their name.
It's one of those Pinterest type ideas which seems lovely but ends up leaving guests with stained hands and fingers (and in the case of this wedding, hungry and thirsty because that plus some otjer crafty 'make memories for the couple' activities didnt fill the time between ceremony and wedding breakfast + wedding breakfast and evening reception)

MaisyPops

These weddings are getting more and more like a children's party each time I open this thread!

Fusioluxe
They look lovely in principle (like this one from google), but the reality at the wedding we were at was a table with multicoloured ink pads, some neat fingerprints with the outlines there, some vaguely oval smudges and others that had clearly been done multiple times over each other.

Then on other tables there were twee 'to have and to hold' poems asking people to help them create their bucket list / write a message for the couple etc. (Similar to these ones from google).

The ideas individually weren't bad and were sweet enough, but all together and hours of hanging around with no refreshments and limjted seating whilst the couple did their photos felt a bit inconsiderate and like they'd thought 'the guests can have a drink and do our guestbook activities' rather than 'maybe we should have some seating and refreshments whilst we disappear for ages'.

No-one is suggesting that the B&G MUST provide massive amounts of food and drink which they can't afford but don't have a wedding for, say 100 guests when you can only really afford one for 50.

Then the guests are hungry, thirsty, bored because they have to wait for hours while the B&G have endless photographs taken while, if they are lucky, having a canape or two and one glass of cheap plonk,. Eventually, have gnawed their own knuckles through hunger, they get served a dry hog bun and pay bar.

If you wouldn't hold a dinner party for nearest and dearest and happily sit watching them spend most of the time hungry and thirsty, why would you do it at your wedding?

MaisyPops

I’m sorry, it looks desperate (to be different) and tacky to me! The last two like Swashbuckle!

It’ll all be put in the bin when they divorce anyway! (Cynic lol !)

Fusioluxe
One on their own isn't my taste but I can see it's sweet. Too many seem desperate to me.
I've also had some friends say they'd been asked to write on jenga blocks and others had a request to bring a photo of them with the couple to go on a photoboard.

The idea of pinterest-worthy unique crafty things sometimes becomes a oneupmanship on trying to be different. When we planned our wedding, we'd seen couples buying baskets with blankets and flip flops for guests, makeup and baskets for the ladies toilets. Personally, there's sometimes too much attention to things that make nice twee photos and not enough on making sure guests have somewhere to sit and have refreshment.

Makes you all sound like the ME ME ME characters that you're accusing B&G of being.

Tbh some people are just me me me and they tend to be the people who choose to have the sort of weddings that posters are talking about here. The worst wedding I ever went to was that of a close family member. They'd made no plans as to most of the logistics around the wedding, despite having chosen a rural venue so DH and I had to spend most of the morning driving family members here and there so that everyone was in the right place (never thanked!) She'd spent an absolute fortune on the dress and flowers and yet openly admitted they'd gone for the cheapest food option (cold buffet but still seated, it was very odd) so that they could save a bit of money. I was pregnant (not the only one) and I couldn't eat a lot of it (cold meat etc, I ended up eating about 3 cold boiled potatoes so there was enough for everyone else at the table) one single free drink, nothing with the meal and a very expensive bar! The venue was completely unsuitable for the groom's father who was severely disabled. You could argue it was all the venue's fault, but I know the bride very well and she couldn't have cared less about everyone else, as long as she looked like a princess and had the photographs to show for it. It's frustrating as it wasn't long after our wedding and I'm definitely not saying ours was the best ever, venue was unexciting and we just had a nice playlist on an iPod and had the TV on in the corner with the football, but we spent the most of our money on food and drink for everyone. Some people are just selfish and weddings seem to be the time that really becomes apparent to everyone!

I think there are far more guestzillas than bride and groomzillas.

I had a wedding that ticked many of the "ok" boxes according to Mumsnet, eg one reception, ample food and (free) drink, reception near church, children included etc etc.

In spite of this, afterwards complaints reached my ears. The reception was in a posh gastropub-type place with a set menu (as you do at weddings) but one aunt complained that she wanted to choose . I have been married 21 years. Whenever I see this aunt (about once a year) she mentions this and I have to apologise . Bil complained that there was a roaring fire in the pub and their dd wanted to crawl on the floor. Fil complained that the country road the church was in was too bumpy for mil...

Whenever I see this aunt (about once a year) she mentions this and I have to apologise  .

Why do you apologise? Why not just say 'Bloody hell Auntie, that was over 20 years ago. Can you not just let ONE DAY of not being able to choose exactly what you wanted to eat go?!'

Honestly, I would have died of embarrassment if my guests had left my wedding hungry. I can't... I can't begin to imagine HOW some b&gs do this without any shame.

My wedding was done on the cheap. Like, really cheap. Cheap venue, the dress was cheap, the suit was cheap. Some flowers and white tablecloths on the tables. A decent local band played for a bit, then it was iPod connected to a speaker.

But. There was food. Lots of food. Lots and lots of food. Prepared by myself, my mum, my grandmother, aunties and friends... took us a long time to cook it all, but there was enough to feed an army!

Also, lots of booze. We bought all the booze. It wasn't expensive fancy stuff, but there was a lot of wine and lots of vodka and lots of soft drinks, more than enough for everyone.

Our guests had a great time, or so they say - considering that the party was still in full swing at 1am, I think it was good!

But yeah. I can't imagine the shame I'd have felt if I didn't provide the food and the drinks.

So many people complaining about no food in the gap - am I the only person who has been to a wedding with literally no food??

@needtonamechange2 none at all? For whole day/evening?

Absolutely nothing! Afternoon wedding but lots of people there - distant relative - no-one mentioned it so I wondered if I was the only one who thought it odd!

Not enough food or 2 canapés and then a 90min break.

Too long breaks with nothing happening.

Poor planning and no consideration for how the guests day will go... yeah you're getting photos taken, Em what are your guests doing mmm???

no parking at church, no parking at reception, no transport available (true fucking story)

Tell us more....

needtonamechange2

The one I went to only served 2 canapes, but because I am vegetarian I couldn't eat either offering.

1 orange juice and it was all.

• no-one mentioned it so I wondered if I was the only one who thought it odd!

@needtonamechange2

Are you sure there wasn't a buffet in a different room and you didn't notice? Because it's weird not to serve food but even stranger that nobody mentioned it.

No not a single thing - oh actually there was a wedding cake which they cut and you could take a piece. My family talked about it - my aunt told me it was just about them getting family and friends together to celebrate and they didn't think that needed great expense but there were proper wedding invitations etc - it wasn't just a gathering. We travelled miles

There was a thread on here about a wedding where the 'food' was one raisin scone/guest over a period of about 12 hours.

I went to one where there was no booze - a kind of afternoon tea arrangement in someone's house. My brilliant other half sneaked out and bought a couple of bottles of white wine from the local Tesco and sneaked them back in. We hid them in the log basket next to the fireplace and stood around politely sipping wine from our teacups - it just looked like weak tea with no milk.

To be fair the day did improve and there was booze later on and fabulous live music and the B&G were lovely people.

I've had to name change for this one!

The wedding where the best man in his speech asked all of the men in the room to stand up. Then only sit down if they hadn't shagged the bride

Wow, so you can't celebrate an occasion without booze? And sneak it into someone's house you're such a steamer you can't go without it for a few hours? I've been to dry weddings because the people had religious objections and others that were 'afternoon tea arrangements' because that's all they could afford, can't imagine feeling slighted that they didn't offer alcohol or take it into their house without asking . How rude!