I'm right to be annoyed with DH about this aren't I?

[NoMoreMarbles]

So I'm in bed this morning and turned into my back. My PJs are long pants and a cami type top(relevant)... I hadn't quite woken up and DH was watching TV and didn't know I was awake.

I feel the top of my PJ top moving and H has it lifted up and is peeping down my top at my boobs... WTF! I brushed his hand off and asked what he thinks he's doing and his response was "I was only having a look"

I'm seriously pi*%?d off that he thinks it's acceptable to purposely look down my top when he thinks I'm asleep!

AIBU?

Pretty soon we will need a written agreement between partners of what is and what isn’t ok. Signed and dates by both parties before anything remotely sexual happens.

I remember seeing a lot of this type of comment on the FB news reports of the rugby players rape trial.

@MakeItAmazing you compared a husband looking down his wife's top to our daughters being raped or sexually assaulted.

How can you not see how offensive that is?

You lot are bat shit. A husband looked at his wife's tits, I hope someone has reported this to the police

I fucking despair

I couldn’t imagine being annoyed by that. Very weird though.

I wasn’t comparing the two. I was trying to point out the support that was lacking from some people towards the op and was concerned for others in their life

This has made me very tearful. I’m not getting into why. I apologise for people missing my points. I would never trivialise assaults

Hope you’re ok OP.

I despair of people who don’t respect others boundaries and don’t understand consent or why it’s so important.

I despair of people who don’t respect others boundaries and don’t understand consent or why it’s so important.

Agreed. This thread is seriously depressing.

You can’t move someone’s clothing while they sleep to look at their body, I don’t understand why people think that’s acceptable. Husbands don’t own their wife’s body.

of course you are being unreasonable.
Not even worth a discussion.

People take this consent thing too far. If this is a problem in a marriage/committed relationship , then you have bigger issues in your relationship to deal with. IMHO

People take this consent thing too far. If this is a problem in a marriage/committed relationship , then you have bigger issues in your relationship to deal with. IMHO

How on earth can you think consent can be taken too far? At what point do I cease to have authority over my own body?

I've just read the first page of this thread, and the entire page is negative. Get a grip, ladies. I'm male, and I can assure you most men would never object to a secret cuddle from their other half, awake or not. In fact, what a pleasant way to be woken up. I'm amazed you all fell so strongly about this.

I'd be quite pleased if OH was having a Pervy moment over me!

This honestly wouldn't bother me if it were my DH.

At times we've woke each other up by kissing/touching to initiate sex. We both find it real turn on.

It's all depends on the type of relationship you have really.

You can’t move someone’s clothing while they sleep to look at their body, I don’t understand why people think that’s acceptable. Husbands don’t own their wife’s body

No, the husband in THIS case can't do this, as his wife has not given her consent. This may be fine between other couples. There's a lot of indignant outrage on here about "women's" boundaries, but actually if a woman is ok with her DH leaving at her body that's fine too! Everyone sets their own individual boundaries within a long term relationship.

@cricketmum84 a normal person on Mumsnet 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

Get a grip, ladies

A man has spoken. Let us all bow down to his wisdom.

I would not be one bit offended if dh had a peek at my tits whilst I was asleep

You lot are bat shit. A husband looked at his wife's tits, I hope someone has reported this to the police

The OP is an absolutely pointless post. Why? The question is aimed at strangers, asking if you are right to be annoyed by your husband sneaking a peek at your jugs. It doesn't matter one jot what anyone else's opinion is - if you are annoyed then you are right. My 2 cents': I wouldn't have cared and would have found it amusing.

I personally don't think your relationship sounds completely healthy if this is annoying you to the point of having to ask for advice.

I would not be one bit offended if dh had a peek at my tits whilst I was asleep

Same here.

Nice to see you are all interested in an alternative point of view

If the OH had previously expressed a desire not to be touched while asleep, then that's different. That would be not respecting boundaries. However, it also might be a sore point that would swiftly end the relationship.

Nice to see you are all interested in an alternative point of view

There are lots of them if you had bothered to read past the first page of the thread.

You sound very prudish the poor man

There are some issues where an ‘alternative point of view’ may not be as healthy as the person expressing it may think.

For instance I’m not interested in those who defend racism, sexism. Their alternative views are noxious.

Consent matters.