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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Daughter kicked off bus aibu

812 replies

user1471461798 · 16/01/2019 19:59

Just wondered what everyone’s thoughts on this was? 17 year old daughter dropped off at the bus stop at 6.44 this morning, she had lost her lanyard with her bus pass on, so was going into college to get a temporary pass, we knew it was at home somewhere. Got on, sat down, the bus driver then asked to see everyone’s pass.. Doesn’t do this every day- specific bus only for her college.( 1st stop in the morning, last stop at night). obviously she didn’t have it, explained and he told her to get off the bus, she asked if she could just go to college and get a temporary pass. ( I know this is true as her friend told her mother the same ).

She then had to walk over a mile in the dark and rain, We had all left for work. also she has a broken arm, so had to carry bags as well. We have asked for an explanation from both the bus company and college, no reply from coach, but college have said the driver was correct!
I feel the coach company had a duty of care to make sure she was safe. What is everyone’s thoughts please?
Maybe a while getting back to everyone, going to the cinema now😊

OP posts:
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9
Haffiana · 16/01/2019 22:27

Also heard a horrible case a few years back where a bus driver kicked a girl off for being short of the fare and she was raped walking home.

Walking home is so very, very dangerous. It should be the next thing to get very scared of and anxious about.

WrongKindOfFace · 16/01/2019 22:31

Technically he was right, but it was pretty shitty to kick her off when he knew her and knew that she attended the college, getting the college bus every day.

TeddybearBaby · 16/01/2019 22:33

Absolute jobsworth!!

TeachesOfPeaches · 16/01/2019 22:38

I walk my 3 year old 0.6 miles to nursery in the morning and we leave at around 7am IN THE COLD AND DARK AND RAIN.

Does sound like the driver was being a bit of twat though if he sees her everyday.

Onlyjoinedforthisthread · 16/01/2019 22:42

Don't worry the OP won't take any notice of any YABU posts she only came on here to be told how hard done by her daughter is and how mean the bus driver is

FrancisCrawford · 16/01/2019 22:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GiantKitten · 16/01/2019 22:54

I see the GFs are out in force tonight

FuckYouRichardParker · 16/01/2019 22:56

Driver was a jobsworth, he could have let her on with a warning he wouldn't do it again without the pass. Petty little power trip. I would have been furious too.

Worsethingshappen · 16/01/2019 22:56

YANBU.
Whether the passenger is 17 or 37, the driver was still unnecessarily unkind.
Are those poster who say that your daughter needs to learn responsibility etc able to say that they have never lost anything?! I doubt it.
I can’t believe he could have lost his job, as some suggesting, by letting a regular college student on without a pass on one occasion.

GiantKitten · 16/01/2019 22:57

As many seem not to have RTFT - OP's DD walked a mile back home.

Her bus ride to college is 90 minutes. Presumably the GFs think she should have walked that distance instead?

MissEliza · 16/01/2019 23:00

If it's like my ds's college, the pass is to show you've paid for the bus. I'm assuming as the term has just started, they want to make sure people are up to date with their payments for the bus which is why he was checking. She's been unlucky but the driver was within his rights.

ThinkAboutItTomorrow · 16/01/2019 23:08

Honestly people are so mean spirited.
YANBU OP - people can choose to be kind or they can choose to ruin someone day. I don’t care how old she is, what they did was mean

Totally agree. There are a lot of jobsworth 'computer says no' types on this thread. Basic kindness says he was a twat.

That said, if it's the policy he shouldn't be in trouble. The policy is seriously wonky though. I'm sick of policy based on an assumption people will abuse the system. It's a race to the bottom and away from common sense and decency.

mum11970 · 16/01/2019 23:16

They won’t let the kids on the dedicated school buses here unless they have a valid pass for that particular bus, it must be shown when getting on or no ride to or from school whether you are 11 or 17. The kids are in full uniform and the bus only goes to that school but if you don’t have a pass you aren’t getting on.
At 17 she is plenty big enough to get herself a mile down the road.

GiantKitten · 16/01/2019 23:19

At 17 she is plenty big enough to get herself a mile down the road.

Her college isn't a mile down the road. Her college is a 90-minute bus ride away. She walked a mile back home

GiantKitten · 16/01/2019 23:21

FFS, she was dropped at the bus stop at 6.45! Hmm

Obviously the college is a long way away! If the college was only a mile away, why would she need to get the bus so early?

mum11970 · 16/01/2019 23:30

She’s still plenty big enough to get herself a mile down the road, whether that is back home or college makes no odds. The OP’s Education Authority must have a lot more money than ours because there is no way they would lay on a bus to travel for 90 minutes for 4 students who are above the age for free school transport.

Lobatri · 16/01/2019 23:33

Driver was mean but you and your daughter have a duty of care for your DD. You knew in advance, and did nothing, expecting others to look after your DD!

mamageebo · 16/01/2019 23:36

YANBU - he must have recognised her, she gets the same bus everyday, her friends could vouch for her being a genuine student and the bus only goes to her college - my ds is exactly the same, he gets the college bus every day, they hardly ever ask to see passes, the driver recognises them all and my ds has lost his lanyard/bus pass before now and the driver just tells him to hurry up and get a replacement (once it had not yet arrived from the bus company in time for college starting so not his fault) Throwing a young girl, especially with a broken arm, off the bus a mile away from home on a cold, dark, January morning is very hard hearted.

Cauliflowersqueeze · 16/01/2019 23:40

Bus drivers don’t let kids on round here if they’ve lost their Zip cards even if they’re in uniform obviously going to school. I think they get in trouble over it. If you accept one on with no pass then everyone should be allowed on with no pass.

Karwomannghia · 16/01/2019 23:41

The driver was a miserable git.

Vicky1990 · 16/01/2019 23:41

This is totally outrageous behavior by the driver, twat.
I had this happen once with my daughter been left at college, bus would have taken Three hours with connections, I had to drive and pick her up, it was lucky I was free to do so.
Phoned the bus company and gave them my version of what a responsible driver should have done, bitch.
I would contact the bus company, the school and the council, they need to sought this out as it will happen again.
All the driver had to do was say ok but make sure you have it tomorrow.

pucelleauxblanchesmains · 16/01/2019 23:46

Why do people keep thinking the SCHOOL is a mile away rather than the bus stop?

halpert · 16/01/2019 23:47

I don't think YABU, the chances are that the driver knew who your daughter was as most college coaches havethe same driver drive the same route each morning and afternoon... the fact that he couldn't just take her is silly.

We had college coaches when I was younger and I'd often forget my pass at home and the driver knew full well who I was and that I had a pass so would just let me on for once day.

The people who are disagreeing with you don't understand the concept of coaches paid for by the college and the fact that the driver probably knew your daughter.

Still, not much to complain about as he was doing his job correctly and I'd just leave it at that

liverbird10 · 16/01/2019 23:53

YABU.

Buglife · 16/01/2019 23:58

Yeah he could have been nicer but is it that big a deal? He was technically right, and I join the chorus of people saying a mile isn’t far at all, I walk 20 mins to and from school every day with my 4 year old and it doesn’t bother him. I can’t see what you think you can do to take it further.