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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Daughter kicked off bus aibu

812 replies

user1471461798 · 16/01/2019 19:59

Just wondered what everyone’s thoughts on this was? 17 year old daughter dropped off at the bus stop at 6.44 this morning, she had lost her lanyard with her bus pass on, so was going into college to get a temporary pass, we knew it was at home somewhere. Got on, sat down, the bus driver then asked to see everyone’s pass.. Doesn’t do this every day- specific bus only for her college.( 1st stop in the morning, last stop at night). obviously she didn’t have it, explained and he told her to get off the bus, she asked if she could just go to college and get a temporary pass. ( I know this is true as her friend told her mother the same ).

She then had to walk over a mile in the dark and rain, We had all left for work. also she has a broken arm, so had to carry bags as well. We have asked for an explanation from both the bus company and college, no reply from coach, but college have said the driver was correct!
I feel the coach company had a duty of care to make sure she was safe. What is everyone’s thoughts please?
Maybe a while getting back to everyone, going to the cinema now😊

OP posts:
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9
RiverTam · 17/01/2019 10:17

yes - but if the only way she can get a temporary pass is from the school office, how is she meant to get there unless on the school bus? It's a stupid chicken-and-egg situation that the school need to rethink.

And if the school are concerned about shooters etc then they need to properly enforce checking of passes - which the driver isn't doing.

Thesnobbymiddleclassone · 17/01/2019 10:17

No bus pass, no bus. That's it.

BitOutOfPractice · 17/01/2019 10:18

I must have missed that shady sorry! Please will you excuse me Confused and stop @ing me

Everything else I said still stands though

ginpink · 17/01/2019 10:19

@Waspnest forgive me, not everyday, every 8 days for shootings, I don't know the stats for stabbing etc.

"on average, a shooting once every eight school days."

www.bbc.co.uk/news/amp/business-46507514

RiverTam · 17/01/2019 10:19

gin - yes, but it makes a nonsense of all the posters saying 'he's only doing his job' which clearly he often isn't and it's down to that fact that the OP and her DD thought she'd be OK as it seems he mainly doesn't check the passes.

So the OP should draw the school's attention to the fact that a) the bus driver isn't doing his job properly and b) that a better solution to mislaid/lost/stolen passes needs to be in place.

Obviously the 17 yo is the one without a pass but I think the adults and professionals in this situation are more to blame.

RiverTam · 17/01/2019 10:20

and we're not in the US so stop banging on about it!

FrancisCrawford · 17/01/2019 10:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Waspnest · 17/01/2019 10:24

ginpink no it doesn't go without saying (please don't try making it look like I'm being the stupid one here). School buses in the UK (and probably the US) are incredibly safe. To claim otherwise is ridiculous. And how do you know about all these school bus massacres happening in the US if they're never reported over here.

SuchAToDo · 17/01/2019 10:24

Op i think you are getting some unfair answers, you say it's a rural college meaning your daughter would be in the dark walking down isolated country roads in her own and if anything happened or she encountered a weirdo with bad intentions there would be no one around to help...

I can understand that and i agree with you, if she takes the bus every day and the driver knows her, and knows she has a bus pass then it was mean of him to dump her off the bus..and leave her in that predicament...either you or your daughter should have a word with the bus company and college about this situation and about what should a student also in future if they have lost/misplaced/forgotten their bus pass and the bus doesn't accept money payment,?..it would be good to ask them , so you can .highlight there is a flaw in the system

ginpink · 17/01/2019 10:25

@RiverTam I agree the bus driver should check every day. That warrants a complaint. But on this occasion he was right not to let her on without a pass.

Ok here's some uk stats. Do you realise that uk staff in schools now have to be taught lockdown procedures incase of intruders? The no pass no entry is so important for child safety.

ginpink · 17/01/2019 10:28

@Waspnest then maybe they should scrap passes altogether.

I'm done debating this, the rules like this are in place for the children's safety. End of.

She didn't have a pass. she should not have been allowed on.

1099 · 17/01/2019 10:30

OP - What is the actual distance to the college from your home, I know it's 1.5 hours on the bus but as you've said the bus goes all round the houses collecting other students, why didn't you just drive her there straight away, you knew she was in the wrong and waited to see if she would get on okay, so presumably you had a plan in case she wasn't allowed on in the first instance, what was it?

Waspnest · 17/01/2019 10:32

Yes my DD's school recently practised their lockdown procedures. How that has any relevance to this school bus scenario is beyond me. And how a bus pass would protect against your scenario is also beyond me. It would probably be more effective if there were metal detectors at the bus's entrance, is that what you're advocating?

sashh · 17/01/2019 10:34

yes - but if the only way she can get a temporary pass is from the school office, how is she meant to get there unless on the school bus? It's a stupid chicken-and-egg situation that the school need to rethink.

I worked for a coach company one summer, drivers usually have a phone (actually the coaches also had a phone) and they also have a list of who is due to get on at each stop.

A phone call to the college would mean the college can contact the bus company to say one person is travelling without a pass and give a name.

Just getting o the bus with no pass and not informing the driver is plain stupid.

ginpink · 17/01/2019 10:34

@Waspnest they have passes so any maniac can't just get on the school bus or go into a school building.

How is the bus driver to know this person is ok to get on the bus without a pass?

OutPinked · 17/01/2019 10:34

YANBU, driver was a tosspot.

He knew who she was, she gets on the bus every day along with the other three students from that area. He was making a point, it probably made him feel big and powerful. Absolute arsehole.

ginpink · 17/01/2019 10:35

@sashh agree with this

Waspnest · 17/01/2019 10:36

They are not in place for the students' safety, they are in place to make sure that only those people who are eligible for free transport get free transport. And yes ginpink we will never agree on this.

RiverTam · 17/01/2019 10:37

sashh not checking the passes evrey day so the children know that's the procedure is also plain stupid, and also someone's job. Stupid to enforce in one circumstance but not all.

gin in your original scenario you had a legitimate pupil enter a school with a weapon.

ginpink · 17/01/2019 10:39

@RiverTam yes, legit pupils have done this before?

Thankfuckforgin · 17/01/2019 10:39

God you bunch of meanies. I think the driver was a dick if he recognised her and did it anyway. Could understand not taking her onto the college grounds and asking her to report in as a visitor would or some such measures to avoid breaking any rules about imposters in the college, but making her walk pre 7am in winter and with a broken arm and college work to carry was shit. I'd feel hard done to if it happened to me even in my 30s and people are forgetting how vulnerable a young woman is if they're saying shes almost an adult and it's therefore okay. Walking down rural 60mph roads in the dark is dangerous full stop. He shouldn't have made her do it. Also what are you supposed to do if you lose your pass exactly? It isn't a bus you can pay for so until you get a new pass you're bollocksed.

RiverTam · 17/01/2019 10:40

so how would the bus driver checking passes to ensure an excluded tooled-up student couldn't get back on the bus help, given that said tooled-up student has already, with ID in order, got onto school property with his weapon of choice?

RiverTam · 17/01/2019 10:41

I'm just making the point that your original scenario as a reason for the bus driver booting this child off doesn't stand up. And it doesn't.

ginpink · 17/01/2019 10:43

@RiverTam he can't. Did I say he could? I'm not saying he's super man, but the lowest level of security is checking people have a pass.

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