AIBU to be angry that this is still happening!

[CosmicCanary]

Bristol News

I know this is not the only girl this has happened to. I know there will be many many girls who have suffered the same humiliation in school just today.

I was one of them many years ago.
So many times i bled through my pad in lesson but I knew asking to go to the toilet in would be met with a NO so i didn't bother. It was a humiliation in its self for the whole class to know you needed the loo. Such a public audience for an other wise private act.

I have already told my DDs should they need the toilet they must ask but if refused walk out of lesson if they absolutely cannot wait and I will deal with school.
They will not suffer the humiliation and shame of leaving blood on a school chair as I did.

Adult females are likely that to know the best way to cope with their periods and what works best for them.

Young girls are just learning the practical problems and are likely to have products that don't suit them. They are likely to have less regular periods, and will not yet be used to dealing with their typical flow.

I have no idea why someone would expect them magically to be in full control. Even adults occasionally have terrible embarrassing accidents. Fortunately, we are able to disappear to the toilets with some discretion, and clean ourselves up.

I suddenly understand why a lot of people I know are educating at home. Before I thought they were deluded. Now I think they have a good point - why would you sent your child to what appears to be worse than a criminal punishment unit for human rights. I wouldn't treat my dogs like this.

If that was my dd I would have made sure a toilet pass was issued. The girl knew the rules

Good for you.
The only mistake the mum made was trusting the school when they assured her it would not happen again and the situation had been dealt with.
Are schools prone to lying and being untrustworthy?

Plus a pass was not offered by the school and frankly as a period is not a medical condition I would think the mum thought one was not available.

U can tell if they are being genuine

How?

Should all girls be given a pass then, because they have periods?

Sounds mad to me.

If a teacher knows that a particular child has been in trouble for vandalism or fighting in the toilets before should they let them go whenever they ask?

Yes as long as it is within reason. So for example not asking twice in a lesson. If a proper record is kept of the time/lesson and that child was correctly punished for previous bad behaviour why wouldnt you?

Apparently so Wooly that and all parents must alert school when their daughter starts or is on her period was another suggestion. So much for dignity and privacy.

It is a look on their face that as a teacher you get to know.

WOW.
Given that you have already stated you never let children go in your lesson it appears that you can tell if they are genuine and you refuse them anyway!! That is fucking twisted.

For example a girl "please miss I really need to go as it is my period " quietly in my ear. I allow

Why the hell should she?
Do you go around telling everyone when you are on your period?
Its none if your business.

Don't twist my words

I am not.
You have already stated on this thread that you do not let children leave hour lesson to use the toilet.
Then you state house can actually tell when a child is being genuine. So that tells me even though you know they need to go you still say no.

So which is it?
Either you lied when you said you never let them leave class or you are lying now when you say you can tell if they really need the toilet?

I don't have girls so I won't deal with this specific problem. However I do have a 9 year old with encopresis caused most likely - as stated by his consultant- withholding because of emotional problems, caused by being refused access to the toilet. Thanks to a year of 'you can go at break or lunch' my kid is on a cocktail of medication and suffers almost constant stomach pain.

So for example not asking twice in a lesson

So you are happy to apply limits? What if this child needed to go twice in one lesson?

And my previous post wasn't just about periods.

The less students who ask to go to the toilet, the less disruption and therefore the more likely that teachers are going to be to allow it.

So if you can cut out all the "I forgot to go at lunchtime but need to go now 5 mins into the lesson" requests then maybe the occasional urgent just started my period or think I have diarrhoea requests will not be an issue.

Surely if students know that they can go whenever they want to there is no need to organise themselves and go at break is there? Why would they? They can spend lunchtime with their friends and then lesson time in the toilet.

Out of interest what do you do if you are going on a long journey with your daughter? If you follow Salems advice you don't make her go before you leave because going "just in case" apparently has a detrimental affect on the bladder. So if you are on a motorway do you immediately pull over? Or would you be more realistic and ask her to wait until you got to the services, which is what mist parents would do, without panicking about impending kidney failure or UTIs.

Because if not they can't go can they

So young girls must tell you private information about their period before you will let them use the toilet?
You are a teacher.
Not their mum.
I seriously think you have a problem.
Its sick to want a young girl to go through the humiliation of telling a teacher about her period all because she needs to clean herself up.

Do you go around telling everyone when you are on your period?
And yes I do have to at work, as I said before.

Though no doubt you'll no doubt yell at me that I'm an adult (in which case why ask the question of an adult?)

Out of interest what do you do if you are going on a long journey with your daughter?

None of your business quite frankly.

However like with all my children as i have older ones. Go in break where possible however if you are desperate then ask to be excused. If you are refused go anyway.

I plan toilet stops if on a long journey. Dont all parents of young children?
I myself have had to pull in to a road side cafe/service station when caught short. It happens and its manageable.

Do you not have service stations or rest stops in London? Are public toilets/,pubs/cafes all toilet free zones?

And yes I do have to at work, as I said before.

Yes of course you do.

I can tell. However they should be going at break so I say no. They are 9 they can manage with out the loo and do so everyday. Most know to go at break.

So you admit being able to tell that a child genuinely needs the toilet but you still say no as they should have gone at break!!

Christ you are fucking twisted. You are punishing a child and potentially causing health problems simply because you can.

I really feel sorry for the children you teach. You should quit. You are a shockingly bad teacher.

Break and lunch are planned toilet breaks

Periods don't always work to plan. Or are you so ignorant you think they are like clock work from the very beginning?