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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think buying a £52 eyeshadow pallet for 9 year old is just madness?

508 replies

pineapplepenthouse · 04/01/2019 21:40

I'm talking about the James Charles pallet. £52 for eyeshadow and blusher. My DD9 wants to spend her Christmas money on it but I have said a firm NO! A lot of her friends got it for Christmas (I know this is true as have seen their mothers show it off on Facebook). Each to their own and all that but £52! AIBU?

OP posts:
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zingally · 07/01/2019 08:11

A 9 year old with make-up? Clearly some people know very different 9 year olds to me! The 9 year olds I know are still into squishies and unicorns!

That being said, it's her money, but I suspect it'll be a painful lesson when she realises she's actually not a scrap interested in it, once she's got her hands on it.

KatyWhatsit · 07/01/2019 08:12

I think there is a good chance this thread will appear in the Daily Fail :)

Mothergooseflying · 07/01/2019 08:12

I bought La Roc eyeshadow pallette 128 colours, off groupon £9.99.
bought for 2 10 year olds for ballroom dancing, its still on there, and it's brilliant.

KatyWhatsit · 07/01/2019 08:18

That being said, it's her money,

The argument that 'it's her money' is ridiculous.

People have given her money as a gift. I am sure they would expect some parental guidance on how it is spent. I'd be telling her that it's a LOT of money- and putting it into context whether that is the amount some families have for food each week, or whatever. I'd be encouraging her to save some of it for something she might want in the future, something 'big' and using some of it now for a treat. Teaching children to save and budget is a life skill.

A parent is there to guide. A child has no appreciation of the value of money at 9.

Having said that, I don't believe a 9 year ought to wear make up at all. They are a child.

Notsurprisedatall · 07/01/2019 08:21

The Belle Jorden (YouTuber) palette is nice and cheap from boots and is incredible, its my daily palette now and I have all Jeffree Stars, Jaclyn Hills, x3 Morphe, ABH ones and more.

The (makeup) Revolution choc bar palettes are great too and Soph (does nails).

James Charles is very overrated, only a big thing because he is a boy in makeup and the females are getting pushed aside because of it. And I say that as a huge Jeffree Star fan.

Nanalisa60 · 07/01/2019 08:37

It’s really hard one !! I can understand why you are saying no but it is her money!! You could just take her to Primark and show her how much stuff she can get for £52 and then ask her if she thinks if £52 for A set of eyeshadow and blusher is good value for money.. If she till wants the expensive stuff then let her buy it. But then the next time she asks you for something new or money to go somewhere say no and then remind her that if she had not spent all that money on makeup then she would have had the money now to buy or do the thing she wants now. Good luck!!

alwaystryingneverwinning · 07/01/2019 08:43

Mines not 9 she's 12 ❤️

XiCi · 07/01/2019 08:57

My dd likes playing with makeup. She also likes squishies, unicorns and lol dolls. They're not mutually exclusive!! They're not going out with a full face of professional makeup on FFS, it's just a part of play. Don't understand the hysteria at all.

AnnAbbieLian · 07/01/2019 09:00

I think anyone of any age spending that much on makeup is absurd.

KatyWhatsit · 07/01/2019 09:41

It’s really hard one !! I can understand why you are saying no but it is her money!!

It's not hard. She is a child. Just because some friends or relatives have given her money in lieu of a 'gift' does not mean she can buy whatever she wants with it.

That is what a grown up can do . She is not an adult.

Would you say the same if she wanted to buy fags, drugs, booze?

XiCi · 07/01/2019 09:55

FFS why are people comparing eyeshadow to drugs. Fucking ridiculous!

Lweji · 07/01/2019 10:07

Nobody is comparing eye shadow to drugs.

It was a comment about children being allowed "to buy what they wanted".

Some parents may be ok with eye shadow, others may not. But it still should be their decision what their children buy with their money, or not. This is why children aren't allowed to handle bank accounts by themselves, fgs.

TurquoiseDress · 07/01/2019 10:13

Why is a 9 year old wearing make up at all??

I've only read the first page of this so it's probably been done to death by now

I barely wear make up apart from mascara, so have no idea how much it all costs....but £52 for eyeshadow seems bonkers to me!

TurquoiseDress · 07/01/2019 10:15

I accept that young girls (and boys!) like to experiment with make-up, putting on blusher, lipstick etc

But it's a very long stretch to go from that to spending £50 plus on some make up!

MountainGoat5 · 07/01/2019 10:24

No way, she's only 9. I started wearing makeup at 11 and now I'm 23 and even I wouldn't spend that much on an eyeshadow pallette! At 9, she should be using cheap stuff from Boots or Superdrug to experiment with etc, although I'd rather not buy it at all at that age...

bobstersmum · 07/01/2019 10:35

Make up at 9 - no.

Unsureoftheissue · 07/01/2019 10:49

I'd be telling her that it's a LOT of money- and putting it into context whether that is the amount some families have for food each week

Bloody hell, really? What would you suggest instead, use it to by food to donate? This was Christmas money, given for a child to enjoy, not to be made to feel guilty about unless it's something you feel is worthy.

KatyWhatsit · 07/01/2019 11:02

Bloody hell, really?

YES REALLY!

Because a 9 year old willing to spend £52 on eye shadow is living on another planet.

And so is a parent who condones it.

And yes, why not donate some of it to Crisis or another charity?

Or at least put it into context of what it could buy for a homeless person so they see the extent of frippery.

I guess you don't know much about 9 year olds if you think they have a grasp on finances and value.

Nanalisa60 · 07/01/2019 11:03

KaytWhatsit No I would not let her buy fags booze or drugs as they are illegal at age 9 but I can’t remember a law being past saying that a 9 year old can’t buy makeup !! why don’t you ask you member of parliament to bring it up in the house!! because let’s face it they don’t have anything else to worry about!! My point was to make her realise what a waist of money it is to spend that much . If you don’t let a child make a mistake then how will they learn. It’s a big lesson in life to realise you can’t do something you want to do because you have spent all your money on trash in this case makeup. Of course this is just my opinion.

ethelredonagoodday · 07/01/2019 11:06

I have to say, I'd not spend that much on make up for me, and I wouldn't buy my 9 year old any make up! She has odd bits of cheapo play make up that friends and rellies have bought her, but neither she nor any of her friends are really into make up!

Beerflavourednipples · 07/01/2019 11:07

If makeup doesn't have any sexual undertones then how come blokes don't wear it (generally: I know some men do, but the ones who do it is their 'thing' and the vast majority of men do not feel they have to wear makeup so that they don't feel 'old').

I bloody love makeup, although I hardly ever wear it, but I love watching tutorials, practising techniques and when I go out I love the process of putting it on (I just can't be arsed to do it every day). However, I'm still aware that I am using it to make myself look 'better' in a way that men don't.

SoupDragon · 07/01/2019 11:09

If makeup doesn't have any sexual undertones then how come blokes don't wear it

Surely the reverse holds true though : If make up does have sexual undertones how come men don't wear it?

rookiemere · 07/01/2019 11:27

For those who haven't read the full thread OP took her DD to superdrug and got a cheap palette instead and was very happy with it.

I think one of the things that's truly sad is how these rights of passage (even if 9 seems rather young) are being so cynically exploited by using a popular name ( who I've never heard of ) to bump up the price tag exponentially of what should be a cheap product.

As a young teen I loved make up and would spend hours trying to create a look - it was more about playing with the colours than anything else - this was the early 80s so there was a lot of New Romantic experimentation going on. I bought the palettes from Rimmel as they were pretty much the only stockiist of cheap sets in those days, and I had loads of fun. Didn't occur to me to spend more on make up until I started work and found out that others did.

These days there are so many fabulous cheap options available of reasonable quality and loads of fun colours. I find it really sad that my friends teenage DDs are spending ££s on expensive brands due to the influence of beauty vloggers who are getting paid to promote products.

Unsureoftheissue · 07/01/2019 11:33

I guess you don't know much about 9 year olds if you think they have a grasp on finances and value.

No, I know nothing about 9 year olds at all. I've had two of them but clearly what they did and didn't grasp about finances at 9yrs old passed me by Confused Or maybe what I reacted to wasn't, for me, about having a grasp on finances? It was more that I don't leave it to gift money to teach my kids about finances, I do that throughout the year, with chores and the like. I don't rely on making them feel guilty about gifted money to teach them about underprivaliged families (especially as I would consider we used to be one and could be so again one day) and imo it's not a great way to teach the lesson you're going for.

what it could buy for a homeless person??? Well why stop there, why don't you take it further, nobody book a frivolous and high cost holiday this year (either home or abroad), think about what that money could do for a homeless person instead.

Lweji · 07/01/2019 11:39

Surely the reverse holds true though : If make up does have sexual undertones how come men don't wear it?

Because women are the ones supposed to look more attractive, beautiful, sexually available.
Men are supposed to look strong, fit, successful and rich (often only two of these are deemed sufficient Grin). Men's make up is an expensive sports watch, for example. Wink

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