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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu about parking & new neighbours

199 replies

Parkingshmarking · 29/12/2018 03:57

Nc for this. Newish neighbours in house opposite ours. The have a driveway with room for 2 cars, mine only has room for 1. Ds1 home from Uni for Christmas & his car is parked on the street outside our house, opposite theirs. Also Ds2 girlfriend here sometimes & her car also parked on the street outside. Notes were left on both cars last week by neighbours saying 'do not park outside our house'. Yesterday Ds1 had friends over so his car + 2 others parked on street. When I left hot work at 4pm neighbour was outside waiting for me, cue rant about cars & how I'm being 'disrespectful' not telling my son & any visitors not to park there. Felt very intimidated & was actually dreading coming home from work last night in case he was waiting for me. Having a tough time generally atm & feeling a bit emotional & vulnerable. Moved here a few years ago to escape a violent ex-p & just want to live a quiet life & not feel intimidated or worried to leave my home. Aibu?

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 29/12/2018 09:44

So, from the diagram, they weren't even parked on his side of the road?

ThatsWotSheSaid · 29/12/2018 09:46

Sometimes it’s all in the delivery - Im presuming if he had introduced himself and politely asked if it was possible for you to park a little further down the outcome would have been different.

CottonSock · 29/12/2018 09:46

If the road is narrow, like other poster said, it could me making his life more difficult. Still no excuse for rude bullying.

choccyp1g · 29/12/2018 09:47

It would be easier for him to park if you parked on HIS side of the road.

If you suggest that to him and he still complains then he is just a miserable git who doesn't like other people's cars in his view.

LakieLady · 29/12/2018 09:49

Unless the road is much, much narrower than it appears in your (beautifully neat)diagram, OP, then your new neigbour is being a dick.

Our road is so narrow that when you reverse out of your drive and between 2 cars parked on the road, you have to go up on the opposite kerb to turn, but people manage. People still managed when the road was one-way, because of road works, although the poor bin lorry driver had to reverse the whole length of the street.

Your neighbour has no right to make you feel intimidated or vulnerable. You have every right to feel safe. Get a stock phrase in your head, like "The cars are parked legally and have a perfect right to be there" and repeat it, just once, every time the neighbour speaks to you about it. Then walk away. If he behaves in a way you find intimidating or makes you feel threatened, then call the police.

Hold your head up and practice looking confident - he'll soon stop when he finds his bullying isn't working.

OliviaStabler · 29/12/2018 09:54

So I assume that he is angry because you are expecting him to divert his journey so he enters the road from a specific end to easily get into his driveway?

regmover · 29/12/2018 09:55

I think I'd try to nip this in the bud with a call to the police non-emergency number. Tell them what happened, that you feel threatened and ask if maybe a community police officer could have a word.

Dollymixture22 · 29/12/2018 09:58

I posted yesterday about my rude neighbour parking outside my house - for three months - without moving his car - blocking two spaces.

Even then I know there is nothing I can do about it - I just think it’s rude.

Your neighbour is being unreasonable. Ensure the teens are being considerate in where they park and aren’t blocking anyone in.

My parents have an elderly neighbour who struggles to get her car in the driveway, neighbours teens park outside her house all the tim, forcing her to walk from the end of the street. The teens should park a bit further away, where there is ample parking, and let this lady park outside her house. Their mother yells hey are legally entitled to park their, and she’s right. But her children are inconsiderate little shits!!

Dollymixture22 · 29/12/2018 09:59

There not their!!

EffOrf · 29/12/2018 10:01

We have to manoeuvre to get out of our drive if cars park opposite, they are parked perfectly legally though so we would never complain. It has been bad this week because of the holidays, there is just too many cars and not enough road nowadays

HeronLanyon · 29/12/2018 10:03

Thoughtlessness re elderly drives me absolutely potty. I also remember how when I was younger I didn’t often think. I am also in sensitive newly bereaved state. Still drives me POTTY.

clarrylove · 29/12/2018 10:06

Can't you block in one of your cars on the drive rather than restrict his access?

Mydogisforlife · 29/12/2018 10:07

Of course there's no excuse for rudeness and intimidation, but cars can be parked inconsiderately even though legally.
If I had to drive round to one particular end of the road to be able to get onto my drive, I don't know if I'd say anything (and I certainly wouldn't be rude) but I| wouldn't be happy.

SoupDragon · 29/12/2018 10:09

How narrow is the road that he can't get onto his drive with a car opposite?

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 29/12/2018 10:17

I bet he has moved from a house where the parking is a nightmare and was delighted with his new house with double drive .(Many times I've seen on MN people say "I wouldn't look at a house with no drive/ Buy a house with a drive then")

So all went ok, until your DS , DS girlfriend and two of DS mates rock up and park.
He's getting his oar in first.
Admittedly a rather cack-handed oar .

Tell him if your DC cars are parked legally he can jog on and don't bother with his PassAgg little notes.

Bringbackthestrioes · 29/12/2018 10:19

So have they bought their house? You said it was previously rented. I was just trying to gauge how long they are likely to be PITA neighbours.

Our over the road house now has renters in and they park outside their house, even though their is rm for 2 cars on their drive, they also regularly have visitors who park directly opposite our drive on a very narrow road. It makes it tricky for us to get in and out of our drive but I wouldn’t dream of saying anything as they are perfectly entitled to park there. Just weird that people think they own the road! Maybe as your neighbours -judging by your diagram- look out onto green space they aren’t happy you are spoiling their view? Again, not something they are entitled to. I hope it can be amicably sorted. Good luck!

NaturalBornWoman · 29/12/2018 10:22

The road is accessible from either end. Therefore if he entered from the top end he could easily swing into his drive in his little car. If coming from the bottom end I can see how the cars may restrict him but he has a choice

So you expect him to divert his journey in order to get into his driveway so that your son's mates can park several cars all up the road? And he's the dick? Have all your other neighbours got private parking or were your visitors taking up all their options too?

Yes anyone can park on a public road, and if you live somewhere with on street parking you do have to suck it up, but it is dickish behaviour to cause problems for your neighbours when you know parking is an issue locally. Just because it's legal doesn't stop it being inconsiderate.

Faroutbrussel · 29/12/2018 10:26

I would ask him if he would prefer you to park on his side of the road so that he has full access from which ever end of the road he drives in from or carry on as you have been doing.

CatnissEverdene · 29/12/2018 10:27

I can see both sides here OP. We have a 3/4 car drive that we play car tetris on, but directly opposite is the only entrance road to the close that gets used as parking when other neighbours have visitors. It makes it impossible to get on and off our drive, and we end up having to piss around making 99 attempts to get out. We've left notes saying please don't park directly opposite our drive but it seems to be the parking place of choice for one particular person Hmm.

In the hope of staying friendly with them, can't you get them to block your drive and park slightly further away?

SpikyHedgehogg · 29/12/2018 10:32

I don't understand why he can only access his drive from one direction. If you can't swing in, could he not reverse in from the direction where there is turning room?

Due to the lack of clarification and the information about space only being available in one direction, I'm guessing that the road is too narrow to accommodate lots of on-road parking and drive access.

Racecardriver · 29/12/2018 10:32

Maybe you should buy him a bit more glue as a New Years present in case he’s run out-seems like he’s been hitting it pretty hard lately.

greathat · 29/12/2018 10:34

The cars are not parked outside the muppets house though? They're parked outside yours...

AWishForWingsThatWork · 29/12/2018 10:35

If there's even a hint of hostility or bullying again from him over legal parking, I would tell him flat out you're calling the police over his harassment and intimidating behaviour.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 29/12/2018 10:38

The cars are not parked outside the muppets house though? They're parked outside yours

Sounds like he can't get on and off his drive easily because of the cars outside the OPs. Depending on how tight it is I don't know whether he's BU or not tbh. If he can easily use his drive then he's being a knob but if he can't then he has a point.

We have a similar problem with our drive as our road isn't very wide so if someone parks across from the drive we cannot get out.

Houseonahill · 29/12/2018 10:39

I see it from both sides tbh because I live on a narrow road (no white lines up the middle) and my neighbours park across there drive on the road instead of on it and it makes it really difficult for me to get on and off my drive BUT I also know they aren't doing anything wrong so I just have to lump it. In short ignore them if you aren't doing anything illegal but I do see how it's annoying.

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