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Original poster

To ask for the funniest stealth boasts you've seen on social media

542 replies

GunpowderGelatine · 27/12/2018 00:11

My real life recent examples:

"About to hang up our Christmas cards onto the wall and gutted to find our stapler is crap, doesn't staple anything, argh!"

Stealth boast translation: look how popular we are

"I'm so sick of getting asked for ID, I just want to buy my gin without ratching for my drivers license, I'm 35 and a mother of three for goodness sake"

Stealth blast translation: I'm soooo young looking

"Wow Holly got a Nintendo Switch for Christmas! 😱😁"

Stealth boast translation: we got her the Nintendo Switch, so we aren't thanking anyone but just want to show you all what good parents we are

GrinGrin

Disclaimer: this thread is lighthearted (not everyone finds this obvious!)

OP posts:
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10
redcarbluecar · 27/12/2018 10:37

@Lauren38 the BMW badge photo would have made my day!

shesabloodywitch · 27/12/2018 10:38

That's exactly what I mean Slow

I am saying I would like to post a picture of my daughter having a good time like everyone else does - then people like you make out it's more than it is

hollylove · 27/12/2018 10:39

Singing kumbaya I see

hollylove · 27/12/2018 10:40

Gotta be sad go bitch on graduation photos

ShotsFired · 27/12/2018 10:40

God, if I got ID'd there would be no stealth about it. I'd take out a full-page ad in Metro to spread the news far and wide Grin

Same as when I do out of the ordinary fancy stuff, I make a right meal of it and am usually in the pics grinning like a crazed woman and deliberately pointing out the fanciness. This is no time to be coy!

ICouldBeSomebodyYouKnow · 27/12/2018 10:42

I don't really understand the beef with graduation photos (even including the class of degree)- surely that's exactly the sort of thing that social media is designed for? There's nothing 'stealth' about it- it's straightfowardly letting your friends and family know some good news.

Guilty of including a pic of DS on his graduation day in my round robin. I felt it provided balance to the letters in which I explained that he'd dropped out of uni. We were both proud and relieved. It was only one sentence in the letter, to be fair (and I didn't mention the class). There will be no more graduations - I'll have to find something else offensive to write about!!

BrumbleHag · 27/12/2018 10:43

"LOVE my new nails!"

Nails not much different to what she has done every 3 weeks but it's as good an excuse as any for a photo of her hand...... wearing the £10k Tiffany solitaire DH had just bought for their anniversary.

MaisyPops · 27/12/2018 10:45

shots Grin

Sharing nice things is totally reasonable. I like seeing people share nice things.

I don't like stealth boasts or humblebragging. But I do love how on MN there's always some who'll turn up saying 'as if you're all just jealous...' or 'wow just wow can't believe some of you are such meanies that you hate people for having a good time' despite the thread being clearly about stealth boasting.

It's like there being a difference between a friend who tells you about their lovely holidays and a friend who finds any excuse to make a link (however tenuous) to their gap yah, the time they went to Vietnam, how the pasta is lovely but not a patch on the artisan home made pasta they had in Italy made by a grandmother on 6th August when the stars were in Jupiter's orbit and the moon was a perfect present.
One is pleasant sharing and the other is bloody irritating (however nice they may be as a person).

Cantusethatname · 27/12/2018 10:49

Isn't there a risk when you post anything, you are sending information about your private life and children to people who may not know you well or even like you all that much (not talking about real friends and family, but friend request type people) and to be honest they won't be pleased you have nice stuff or your kids are doing well because that is human nature.

Southernmama · 27/12/2018 10:50

I have a lot of stealth boasters on my FB, I tend to just roll my eyes and scroll on.

Speaking of stealth boasting- I got severely told off by a friend last year when I passed my driving test (I'm in my late 30s) and posted a pic of my pass certificate. Apparently it makes people who have failed multiple times feel horrible about themselves.
She removed me when I posted a pic of the steering wheel of my new car. Wish I could say it was a Lamborghini but sadly it's a 13 year old car with more dents than I can count! Still love it though and dgaf if it's boasting 😂

MiraculousMarinette · 27/12/2018 10:54

I have once posted a picture of my degree certificate because it was a first class in a very difficult subject. I was a mature student with toddler in tow and this piece of paper is the only thing I am proud of in my life (apart from my child). I am very average in every other aspect of my life and worked very hard to complete the degree. I do cringe when I think back to posting that picture but I was ever so pleased with myself.

BoundByBriars · 27/12/2018 10:55

This is why I don’t post. I hear so many people making bizarre interpretations about what other people post that I would never have made and that simply can’t be the poster’s intention. You really are damned either way by some and it probably says more about the criticiser than the poster.

Friends have posted about being ID’d before - I think it’s funny and must be embarrassing/annoying for them, I’m not jealously thinking they’re bragging about how young they must look. Confused

Also, when someone posts about an achievement or lovely gift or experience, I’m not in front of my screen scathing about them “showing off”, I’m genuinely happy for them!

I understand the concept of the stealth boast/humblebrag, but many obviously don’t and take it as an opportunity to slate anyone who has something they would like themselves but do not have.

Ilikeknitting · 27/12/2018 10:55

I get annoyed at the “Ive Just bought a Maccy D for a homeless man” or “Lady with a pushchair couldn’t pay for her groceries so I gave her the shortfall”

Charitable acts are lovely, but all the good karma is undone once you need to post it on social media to boast about how kind and generous you are. Do your charity please, but don’t boast about it.

GusleBusle · 27/12/2018 10:55

The worst stealth boast I’ve seen and I’m not even sure if it is a stealth boast or dillusion was
‘ I’m going to have to take {daughters name} out of nursery... childcare is so expensive... it’s disgusting the government won’t help me as I earn over 100k a year, I work hard and I still need to feed and clothe my children’

She is a network marketer for juice plus so is around, so her children didn’t exactly need to be at nursery anyway.

GenerationSnowflake · 27/12/2018 10:56

But I do love how on MN there's always some who'll turn up saying 'as if you're all just jealous...'

how do you describe the fake laugh against graduation photos? What the hell is wrong about these exactly? Or do you take it as a dig against people with fertility problem maybe? Hmm

the stapler: anyone with kids in Primary School is inundated with at least 40 Christmas card per child, it doesn't make anyone feel popular.
Photos of a Christmas tree with presents: people happy to spoil their kids a bit, shocking I know

Some of us only have friends and family on social media and are happy for them. Others seems to enjoy slagging everybody off because they feel insecure in their life. Again, it's funny but not the way they think.

Lauren38 · 27/12/2018 10:57

@redcarbluecar it was so ridiculous.

brizzledrizzle · 27/12/2018 10:58

I have once posted a picture of my degree certificate because it was a first class in a very difficult subject

That's not stealth boasting, it's something to be proud of and genuine friends would be delighted for you. If you'd posted here's my degree certificate printed on rare vellum from an animal out of the Garden of Eden in a rare, hand made diamond encrusted frame using diamonds from the same mine as the Crown Jewels then that would have been boasting. I doubt you are that much of a twat.

Klobuchar · 27/12/2018 10:59

I live overseas in a major utterly amazing city so things I do every day probably look like showing off to someone from my hometown. Tbh I have cut down a lot on social media since moving here as I think a I was just pissing people off.

I enjoy stealth boasts, though. Some are a bit silly and you wonder why they’re bothering but overall good for them.

That said, there is one person on my Facebook who refers to “my team” when talking about work and yes, I get she is the boss and well done her but in my experience only massive pricks refer to their team as “mine” rather than “the team” or “our team”, even if they are in charge of it

Lauren38 · 27/12/2018 10:59

I agree with all those flagging people who post about charity donations. It's like on here when people started a thread saying WIBU to hold the bus for a lady with 3 kids when the driver couldn't see her?

redcarbluecar · 27/12/2018 11:00

@Miraculous - that isn’t stealth boasting; it’s sharing a special moment in your life. For it to be SB (which this thread is making fun of), the post would need to have pretended to be about something else. ‘Omg I was clearing out this really messy cupboard and look what I found’

LilMy33 · 27/12/2018 11:00

Stealth and not so stealth boasting doesn’t bother me all that much, I roll my eyes and move on. However, what I intensely dislike is people making a point of telling anyone who will listen that they give to charity. “I’ve just given a homeless person outside primark a Greggs gift card” “here’s a picture of me giving a cup of coffee to a homeless person” “here’s another picture of me collecting for charity in Sainsbury’s”. (All the same person).

I think it’s great that people help those in need, I give to charity too. But it leaves a bad taste in my mouth to brag about it. Give the person the change, the coffee or whatever, stop for a chat and then let them get on with their day. Don’t use them and their situation to get likes on social media for yourself.

Southernmama · 27/12/2018 11:04

To me, posting about an achievement such as passing your degree isn't stealth boasting, that's absolutely something to be proud of and shared with whoever you want to share it with.

Posting pictures of 100 toys for your 3 year old asking if people think you've bought them enough presents is stealth boasting. And irritating.

WhatsUpHun · 27/12/2018 11:06

That said, there is one person on my Facebook who refers to “my team” when talking about work and yes, I get she is the boss and well done her but in my experience only massive pricks refer to their team as “mine” rather than “the team” or “our team”, even if they are in charge of it

oh no, i say 'my team' but i mean it from within, as in 'my team are awesome' i dont own the team, i'm not the boss or anything

BabySharkDooDooDooDoo · 27/12/2018 11:07

This thread is brilliant Grin

Fairenuff · 27/12/2018 11:09

A recent one was all about having finished work before Christmas and was along the lines of "So #tiredout but feeling so #blessed and will miss all my lovely little people, have a #fabcrimbo my lovelies xxxx" accompanied by a photo of all the chocolates and other stuff given to her by the kids in her class.

How is that stealth bragging? The person is saying they are tired (yep, bound to be) but happy (great, why shouldn't they be) will miss the children over the break (well maybe not too much but teachers do actually like the kids they spend all day with and will be thinking about some of them and maybe even worrying about them over Christmas), and they are showing all the gifts they received from said children (not stealthily at all).