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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

anyone else having a really rather bollocks xmas?!

152 replies

artisantastemaker321 · 25/12/2018 19:36

god knows I am.

'd'H and inlaw related...has ruined the whole day. trying to hold it together for our lovely kids but so sick and tired of it all. don't want to bore you with details...but am so tired of looking after everyone and no-one really looking after me.

first world problems blah blah i know, but to all of those struggling with 'perfect' christmases and families - you ain't alone. just want a handhold in return i guess!

OP posts:
Scoogle · 25/12/2018 20:37

Streaming with cold. Mum was diagnosed with a brain tumour week ago..Kids have no idea. I thought it would be horrendous, but in all honestly it's been a good one.

WickedGoodDoge · 25/12/2018 20:38

Yep. At ILs. Is awful. When can we go home? It's fricking 8:30.

orangecushion · 25/12/2018 20:43

its crap and its dark and tomorrow it will be over.

Mummadeeze · 25/12/2018 20:43

Have been kind of dreading it because of my partner being nasty but he has pretty much ignored me so far today which is much better than I was expecting. Our daughter has had a lovely day and that makes me happy. Always focusing on that to get through.

Figgygal · 25/12/2018 20:43

It's just so underwhelming here
Ds 7 and 2 have had lovely presents as have the adults, some socialising down the pub but too much food and booze in army in meant not even had a pudding yet just raging heart burn

vjg13 · 25/12/2018 20:45

"its crap and its dark and tomorrow it will be over." That really sums it up for me.

LoveBeingAMum555 · 25/12/2018 20:47

In the grand scheme of things (and compared to others on here) its been fine. I did 90% of the work and felt like no-one really appreciated it, DH clearly not all that impressed with his presents but I am still puzzled as to why (I thought I did quite well with my limited budget).

Kids are grown up and less interested and I think I am still adjusting to that, need to try and do things a bit differently next year I think.

TornFromTheInside · 25/12/2018 20:47

Xmas has become nothing other than an exercise in over-indulgence...

Crazy spending, crazy amounts of foods, crazy amounts of visiting, crazy amounts of faux smiles.

Moderation in all things would make Christmas so much more enjoyable, but it seems difficult to achieve.

Subtlecheese · 25/12/2018 20:50

It's been pretty lonely, husband at work, eldest with Dad. But better than being dragged down by my family. No Christmas presents or dinner as there was no point. Other stuff sucks.
Much care to all. No matter WHY today sucks, my sympathy and wishes for a less dark time. Feeling crap deserves sympathy x It doesn't have to be a tragedy to hurt and just want a handhold xx
Gentle unmumsnetty hugs

N0rdicStar · 25/12/2018 20:52

Most of the posts on here have been nothing to do with over indulgence.

Lumpy76 · 25/12/2018 20:53

I’ve been trying to be grateful for what I’ve got but then got my period (we are ttc after a mmc - my second in total). We were out to lunch - one dc (suffers from anxiety) went home and the youngest fell asleep right when food was served. All in all I’ve not done very well with the being positive and enjoying myself & AF just reinforced where I should have been and not where I am. At least I didn’t have to suffer any wider family!!!

Tweakanddashi · 25/12/2018 20:54

@morgan kitten last year at Christmas my dad was in a coma. This year he's been able to get home from hospital for the and is on the mend I think. Best wishes to your mum.

Tweakanddashi · 25/12/2018 20:55

Sorry trying again @MorganKitten.

N0rdicStar · 25/12/2018 20:56

But I do know what you mean in a way.

katesxo · 25/12/2018 20:58

yep, pretty sure i've got tonsillitis, can't swallow anything without it feeling like i'm swallowing broken glass, can't sleep bcos i can't breathe and also have to watch everyone else eat the food and alcohol that i paid for!! Xmas Sad

FlirtyRomanticToast · 25/12/2018 20:59

TY so much artisantastemaker321 [flowers÷]

posthistoricmonsters · 25/12/2018 21:00

Well I woke up still sleepy and exhausted from the sleeping pills last night, couldn't shake it because I've been so fatigued, fell asleep around mums after lunch, started feeling weird in the tummy between there and my DP's brothers place, ate a huge roast which I kept farting through, then I had the worst case of diahorrhoea in ages. It's recurring, so I'm in bed. Night, you lot.

FlirtyRomanticToast · 25/12/2018 21:00

Sorry
Flowers

yolofish · 25/12/2018 21:02

It was better than I expected tbh. My DH was diagnosed with stage 3 cancer on Oct 7 and has had NO treatment as yet, nearly 3 months on. My DM died on Nov 1. But we put off all other rellies and spent the day very quietly with the DDs. It wasnt exciting, but it was calm, and peaceful. Wishing the same to those of you who havent had a good day today, that tomorrow is better.

Louby6 · 25/12/2018 21:04

We had to have our beloved dog put down on Christmas Eve. My face aches from crying and my chest hurt all day. I just wanted to crawl under a rock instead of being super mum!

BloomsButtons · 25/12/2018 21:04

We have MIL staying. She announced to my Mum while DH and I were in the kitchen that she think she might stay until after New Year!!

No, she won't. I'm a teacher and need some of these holidays to chill out. Thankfully youngest DS (13) has asked if we an go and see his eldest brother (24) at the weekend so we can drop MIL home at the same time .

Tink2007 · 25/12/2018 21:06

Am usually the queen of Christmas but we lost my grandad last month and I just can’t find my Christmas spirit :(

MujosMama · 25/12/2018 21:06

Very much with you re. The forced jollity feeling a bit old! It's not been actively shit here but just doesn't feel like Xmas Day. DP on nights, didn't finish until gone 9 this morning so he came home knackered and with a bloody uniform to wash, meanwhile DS (18 months) woke up at 6.30 with a roaring temp and struggling to breathe so we had an early morning trip to the out of hours GP to get antibiotics for what turns out to be horrific tonsillitis. Came home, lovely presents just from each other, very thoughtful gifts from DP but whole day just felt flat. He then went to bed and I spent the day keeping DS as quiet as possible and cooking. Don't really feel like we got to spend any time together and certainly don't feel full of the spirit. I've just finished chemo and still feel exhausted, bald and have hot sweats all the time. Just watching bake off while the dishwasher runs, and looking at the bins which I know if I don't take out tonight will sit all day tomorrow because I'm at my mums (3 hour drive, early start) and DP is working. Bleurgh. Fuck it. Where's the prosecco

Bibijayne · 25/12/2018 21:08

My DS's first Christmas. Crap does not cover it. Family suck sometimes. Haven't enjoyed it. Had a couple of rows, lots of tongue biting over general CFery.

Most people now gone. Thank the lord. In bed cuddling 4 month old.

RubySlippers77 · 25/12/2018 21:10

Yep, not great here either. DP didn't bother to get me a present - not even a token box of chocolates as he did last year - I'm a SAHM so don't have the money to buy myself anything. He said not to buy him much (as technically he's paying for it anyway!) but I chose a few thoughtful things that he'd use (clothes etc). The DC got loads of presents but from the enormous stack of presents under the ILs tree today I got..... two. A vacuum cleaner from MIL which I did want and am grateful for - but it's not exactly exciting! - and some nice Body Shop stuff from DP's cousin. We may have got a couple of joint presents from other family members but if so DP has opened them and not mentioned it.

Zero presents from my family, not even a voucher emailed to me. To be fair my brother sent presents to my DC; my DM and DF didn't even do that. And yet there's been no quarrel, no falling out, I just don't see them very often as I live a long way away. Apparently that means I don't get a present Sad

Flowers and hugs to everyone else having a rubbish day!!