AIBU to feel LIVID!!!! 😔

[Bamchic]

Because after 4 .5 years MIL doesn’t even know my name.
Apparently it’s because I’ve not had DHs child. So I’m not really in it for the long haul
I had to have a TFMR in 2017 past 20W, and this would’ve been DS first Christmas (Edd 20.1.18)

I can’t fathom why she can’t learn my name 2 syllable very plain think Emma, Susie, Jessie etc.

We are here until 2 and I feel so sad. Can’t wait until 330 when I can see my own mum and dad. I feel so sad and worthless 😢

Did she actually get your name wrong?

Mine sometimes forgets mine and it's been twelve years! I put it down to memory issues 😂

Oh cross post - yes that's very rude.

Oh the ex wife’s name is just a bitchy thing to do.

But I ask again - where’s your dh in this?! What does he say? Why is he not correcting her every single time?

I’d say to him if she gets it wrong once more I’m off. I really wouldn’t be spending any more time with someone like this

She calls you ”John’s wife” (or whatever your DH’s name is)?!

I am speechless. That is so unbelievably rude!

I was friends with SIL for years before too. She knows me 😔

DH and I are fairly LC. He’s not very confrontational so we tend to step back

I wouldn't slip away. I would make an announcement that I was leaving because of her rudeness, and make sure everyone heard.

She's being very unkind. If you don't nip this behaviour in the bud now she will only get worse.

If you know her DH past girlfriends name call her that.

Then call her out on it. Say 'my name is xxxx, and if you deliberately get it wrong again we are leaving'.

Why is your bloke putting up with it, he should be dealing with his mother.

That’s staggeringly rude. Does she actually call you an entirely different name, or an incorrect version of your name like Marie instead of Maria?

What does your DH say?

Yes, “Simon’s wife” occasionally with a click.

As the child of a family who lived in that passive aggressive atmosphere all my childhood (because, no it does not go away when you have children). Get out. Either make sure that your partner takes a stand or consider refusing to go to the family. It does not get better

Please don't pretend to forget her name. Be the bigger person and show her why her DS loves you. I am so sorry for the loss of your son. Today will be hard on you and it is such a shame that your MiL is so unsupportive. Hang on in there and remember she will only be doing it because she can see how much her DS loves you.

Keep your head high. You’ve suffered a loss and that’s enough to deal with right now. Who gives a shit about this woman really?! She has her own issues I reckon. Remember how wonderful you are and answer her back, call her fil’s names wife or something or some other suggestion. You’re nobody’s fool. Don’t upset yourself but have a few replies to her. That’s what I think anyway! Not long now x

Yeah, I would lose it. Definitely. All her out on it if she does it again...

The next time she does it, say, in a jokey voice ''ok, what year is it, who's the president?'''

I'd just leave tbh and I am no drama as long as possibly avoidable- so sorry for you! and do call her Dave. Even though Dave is a nice name. Bob or Dick maybe. Poor you!

@selkiesolstice that made me laugh. You should do that!

You HAVE had DHs child! It makes me so mad when little babies who sadly didn’t make it are discounted like this. What a horrendous human being your MIL is. I sincerely hope your DH is not made from her mould, but he really should be giving her darling mama a talking to. Agree with PPs, never call this woman her actual name again. Furious for you OP

Thanks all DN 12 has just come and given me a hug, she thinks I look sad and wants to give me a manicure with her new set
I think I’ll try and stay polite. But firm. “Do you mean bamchic, I’m not x y z”

She actually calls you 'Simon's wife'!!!!!

That is above and beyond rude.

I wouldn't be there for a minute longer and I'd be adding a FUCK YOU, before I left.

Your DH needs to have a word!

What a sweet girl.

I'm so sorry for your loss op.

I wouldn't be visiting. If DH is ignoring the isdue then you have a DH problem as well as a MIL one.

Can you just ignore her when she calls you anything other than your name?

Of course you are worth more than this. I think this would be m last Christmas spending time with a woman who doesn't care for me. I hope you will send a lovely day with you parents and make it clear to your partner you won;t be spending time with her at Christmas again. XXXX

Wtf?? Why isn’t your husband sticking up for you??? If my husband kept quiet in
This situation is divorce him! You have a husband issue too. If he loves you he should be on your side???

Chin up lovely

She’s a sad, sad woman. You and your DH have you whole lives ahead of you. Bollocks to her.

So sorry for your loss in 2017.