to wish my mother would talk normally?

[IAmAlwaysLikeThis]

Every sentence has some twee, often made-up word in it.

“Pass me the dooda” instead of “pass me that plate”.

“Would you like a sploosh of tea?” instead of “would you like a tea?”

“be careful in case the fridge makes an avalanche” instead of “the fridge is full so be careful”.

It just makes me cringe. It’s impossible to talk to her normally. I know we all have our own little mannerisms but it’s just constant and grating. The thing is that she’s so grumpy and angry most of the time that it just doesn’t go with her personality at all which makes it more annoying.

Unless your mother is a CBeebies character YANBU

Let her get on with it. Not hurting you is it?

How old is she op and how long has she been doing it for? Sometimes when people have early signs of dementia they substitute words in sentences or rephrase things because they can't access the usual word in their brain.

I agree - if she has done this all her life that is one thing - but if she has only started doing this in recent years I think it’s her brain not functioning properly. I substitute words accidentally when tired or stressed.

"Would you like a tea" is definitely more unacceptable than any "XXX of tea". "Would you like a cup of tea" is clearly the only truly acceptable version...

That would annoy me too, OP.

My own mother likes to childishly mispronounce things and then giggle at her own silliness

My mother is the same OP. Always been like it. All these weird sayings she comes out with constantly. I am particularly annoyed by it since having my DCs. I try to Ignore but it’s not easy. I feel your pain!

Complain about your mother being grumpy and angry all the time, by all means.

But nitpicking cringing criticism of her putting a slight spin on how she expresses herself seems dickish.

When your mum is gone you will miss the day she spoke

an avalanche makes sense.
perhaps she can't remember the name for things, it happens

Haha my mum is exactly the same. "My washing machine is terminal". Pardon? Do you mean it's broken? Breaking? Has turned into a section of an airport?

Another thing she says, and did throughout my childhood, is when she doesn't like something I've said she'll say "I'll XX you."
For example:
"This tastes like slop"
"I'll slop you"
In context it makes sense (kinda). But 99% of the time it's just random and it sounds more like this:
"I can't be arsed going there today"
"I'll arsed you"
TALK NORMALLY!!

Also it doesn't surprise me in the least that it only took 3 posts before someone cried 'dementia'. Not every elderly person has dementia FFS

She's a poet😁

Didn't take long for the 'you'll miss it when she's dead' lot to emerge.
My mother's dead. I DO NOT miss any of the infuriating things she used to say. OP YANBU.

I am guilty of saying things like that. Sometimes my brain can't grab on to the right words. I am in my mid 50's and have no issues as far as i am aware. Just a weary brain at times.

first world problems

my late mum used to say shammypoo and other cute things i miss her-does it matter so much

She sounds great!

My mother says "flip flaps" instead of flip flops and it drives me INSANE!

it'd irritate me too but it's not worth getting het up over.

She sounds like a bit of a character TBH. They’re harmless but quite sweet expressions. You sound like a teenager who is embarrassed by anything and everything your parents do. From your OP I know who I’d rather have a cup of tea with.

Sounds as though you don't like her very much tbh.

My Mum does this, but she’s had a stroke and finds it difficult to find the correct words, I find it quite cute & endearing.

I know some people think this is cutesy and shows character, I would hate it. YADNBU.

YANBU
Mine likes to call adult friends of ours 'Auntie or Uncle' when they aren't related to us. My friend does it too.
Drives me mad. My kids call their aunties and uncles just that ( Auntie xxxx and Uncle xxxx) and anyone else by their normal first name.

Mrs Malaprop