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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Absolutely Raging at DSis

619 replies

DroningOn · 23/12/2018 10:45

DSis and her DH were at a wedding yesterday, we had their DD1 and DS3 overnight. We've got a panto today at 1:30 for me, DH and our 2 kids.

DSis knows of our plans and has just text to say that both her and DH had too much to drink last night and can't drive until at least mid afternoon. They're 90 mins away so that's today's plans fucked up. Obvs not an AIBU but I am incandescent with rage at the moment.

AAAARGH! Angry

OP posts:
SuperLoudPoppingAction · 23/12/2018 13:22

It depends on level of CFery though.
Some 3 year olds might enjoy a pantomime. Some might fidget and bother others.
Either way the CF sister will see it as some kind of bonus reward for her shitty behaviour.
It's done now anyway.
But if it were me I would not have done this in case it spoiled things for my own children. I would not be feeling as generous as usual.

QuackPorridgeBacon · 23/12/2018 13:22

I’d have demanded she comes and gets them in a taxi. Obviously you couldn’t force her and I imagine she’s a twat and you would have to miss the pantomime. But I would have made clear how angry I was at her selfishness. She chose how much she drank, you do not get drunk accidentally when you have two young children to collect the next morning. Sleeping would have been my priority if someone was kind enough to watch my children. She could have gone out, came back at a a decent time and had a good sleep in while still collecting their kids on time. I would never babysit again because she clearly can’t be trusted. If she had a genuine reason say an emergency of some sorts of course I would happily miss out, maybe slightly upset but would understand. What she has done is pure selfish and clearly doesn’t care about other people. I’d also ask her for the money because it’s her fault you couldn’t use your ticket.

Brownzy · 23/12/2018 13:23

Ah I'm really angry for you. They have behaved incredibly selfishly. I have a toddler and understand the lure of freedom when the opportunity arises, but id like to thibk i wouldnt do this!
let's hope they are more remorseful once sober.

ResistanceIsNecessary · 23/12/2018 13:24

They are both being very cheeky and selfish. However the age of the kids means they can't be left or popped in a taxi, so I think OP's proposed course of action is the most sensible one.

Hell would freeze over before I'd ever do them a favour again though.

UrsulaPandress · 23/12/2018 13:25

I'd also send the 3 year old to the panto and only have one child to cope with.

QuackPorridgeBacon · 23/12/2018 13:25

FairyBunnyAgain I think some of what you’re saying is a tad extreme. None of this is her children’s fault, to threaten not to look after them makes you seem unhinged and irresponsible. It wouldn’t make the op any better than her sister. Even if you would look after them but are saying something extreme to get a reaction, it’s still a silly thing to do and is nasty in my opinion. To then stop the children receiving any Christmas presents you have bought them is again, unnecessarily mean. Why would you punish the children? It’s only the parents at fault.

KittenEsque · 23/12/2018 13:27

Interested to hear what you’re planning to say when they finally appear OP?

LittleBearPad · 23/12/2018 13:27

Do you have any friends who can babysit the children whilst you go. Obviously they should charge and DSis foot the bill.

She should be in a taxi and buying you new theatre tickets for something in the spring.

BoneyBackJefferson · 23/12/2018 13:28

Have they said when they will deem fit to turn up?

user1471426142 · 23/12/2018 13:29

I’m would be furious. She should have sent one of them in a taxi to relieve you and would have had the time to do it. She should have been deeply apologetic and offering to pay for tickets not brushing you off with an excuse.

Now you’re in the situation you are, I think the only thing you could have done is what you did with one of you staying behind. It is deeply selfish of them.

There was definitively some bonkers advice on here though. No-one sane would send a 1 and 3 year old on there own with a stranger with no car seats in a taxi for 90 minutes (and no taxi driver would accept that).

snowie01 · 23/12/2018 13:29

Their punishment will be you never babysitting again, and please stick to that. Hope DH and the DCs have a good time at least.

CorBlimeyGovenor · 23/12/2018 13:30

Usually you can have babies or toddlers on your knee at the theatre. Take them with you. Then, if you're not let in, go for a coffee instead whilst your sis and DH are left waiting for you outside your house in the cold with a hangover. If they are allowed in to the panto, explain to your sis how scary it was for her three year old who prob won't sleep for the next six months!

RandomMess · 23/12/2018 13:31

Sadly I think they will stretch out the turning up until tea time in fact possibly bed time...

Holidayshopping · 23/12/2018 13:31

I can’t believe her attitude that you’ll just miss out on expensive panto tickets and do it and it’s not their fault as they don’t get out much!?

What is she like historically-is she a piss taker and this doesn’t surprise you? Or is this totally out of character for her?

londonmummy1966 · 23/12/2018 13:35

Teach the three year how to create a drum kit out of saucepans and metal spoons complete with pan lid cymbals so that they can show mummy and daddy their new party trick when they get home.

Gina2012 · 23/12/2018 13:37

Do what you're doing, OP, but never ever babysit for your sister again

Crimbobimbo · 23/12/2018 13:44

Definitely buy the three year old a whistle.

Letshopeitsallok · 23/12/2018 13:44

Your sister is working from the phrase “it’s easier to get forgiveness than permission”. Unless her expression of remorse turns out to be fucking exceptional, she’ll find out she’s wrong.

Juells · 23/12/2018 13:44

londonmummy has given the best advice ever.

ThanosSavedMe · 23/12/2018 13:50

I’m sure the 3 year old would love a recorder for Christmas

Chloe84 · 23/12/2018 13:52

I heard you don't have to have car seats in a taxi. Could you take them home that way?

Cagliostro · 23/12/2018 13:53

Wow selfish twats

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 23/12/2018 13:53

Bloody awful behaviour from your DSis. She/partner should have got a taxi to you and waited until the other one was safe to drive.

blackbunny · 23/12/2018 13:55

Please let us know what she had to say for herself when she turns up.
Anything less than grovelling at your feet means both barrels plus demand the money for your ticket.

stopitandtidyupp · 23/12/2018 13:59

Horrendous. I am raging for you also.

How selfish!

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