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Original poster

To consider going to a strip club cheating?

437 replies

DonaldDucksTowel · 23/12/2018 09:56

DP went out last night and was home much earlier than I was expecting, I asked him why and he said everyone had gone to a strip club so he got his kebab and came home

As the conversation went on he basically expected me to be very grateful that he didn’t go and came home early instead Hmm so I said “I’m supposed to be super grateful that you didn’t cheat on me, pay for the privilege and exploit a load of vulnerable women in the process? Get a fucking grip!” And basically we got into a bit of a ‘stripclubs aren’t cheating, yes they are’ back and forth for a while

I don’t understand how having a naked woman rub herself all over you would ever not be cheating - and even worse in a strip club than if you were just at a party because you’re actually paying for it! If it was a prostitute it’d be cheating so why not a stripper?!

He thinks I’m being dramatic Hmm
Do you consider going to a strip club cheating?

OP posts:
GlitterStick · 23/12/2018 20:51

What many women on here are wanting to do is stop women from making good money. that isn't feminism

That's exactly my problem with feminism too. Telling other women what they world or shouldn't be doing or thinking.
Er, no. We don't all have to think the same.
As I said earlier, telling women what to do isn't on whoever it's coming from.

F1ame · 23/12/2018 20:52

When we lived in East London, near the city, many moons ago, there was one particular strip club that made me so uncomfortable, I used to take a different route home to avoid it. Once I walked past to hear football- style chants of, “We can see you cellulite” Another time a woman was outside screaming to some other people that the punters had been stubbing out cigarettes in her legs while she was on the table.
This was obviously about as seedy a strip club as you can get, but I do think, however much you try and dress it up as glamorous and empowering, when you cut back to basics this is the underlying mentality, so why not just call it for what it is - grim.

GlitterStick · 23/12/2018 20:52

they should not world!

Sandbox · 23/12/2018 20:55

It definitely can be grim but having one bad night and a hundred good nights makes it worth it. Like any job you have bad days and decent clubs have great security guys and a house mum to look out for the dancers.

Strongmummy · 23/12/2018 20:56

@F1ame - that sounds like an awful club and I think I know the one you mean. However, there is also an expensive club nearby where that absolutely wouldn’t happen as the security would be on them immediately

starcrossedseahorse · 23/12/2018 20:56

Yes the reality of this world is not the glittery glamour that some would have you believe.

Fwiw, my feminism is not about 'empowering' women to sell themselves to men. It would be a very male centric and skewed version of feminism that thought this was in any way progressive at all. Confused

Imissgmichael · 23/12/2018 20:58

Gyrating around with no or little clothes on so that sleezy men can get a hard on isn’t the same as being a professional dancer is it?

I’d be interested to see this advert in the job centre and it’s personal specifications. I wonder if anyone got sanctioned for not applying?

Sandbox · 23/12/2018 20:58

How the hell would you know starcrossed from all your comments I doubt you’ve been in one or spoken to the women who CHOOSE to work there

PengAly · 23/12/2018 20:58

I agree it CAN BE grim but you cant make a sweeping statement that all are bad as that isnt the truth. Its sad to see so much anti-feminism on this thread

Sandbox · 23/12/2018 20:58

For the hundredth time it’s not just men. There’s women, couples, hen parties. Sheesh

abacucat · 23/12/2018 20:59

A ballet dancer doesn’t dance for free? A musician doesn’t play for free.
Yes they do. Plenty do voluntary work. For example performing for free for charity events, or for dying kids.

Strongmummy · 23/12/2018 20:59

@Imissmichael - have you tried pole dancing love?!?!?!

starcrossedseahorse · 23/12/2018 21:00

PengAly you have no idea what feminism is.

Sand I can read. It's a useful way to learn things.

PengAly · 23/12/2018 21:00

@starcrossedseahorse you seem to have started ignoring my replies to you. Is that because you didnt get the answer to your questions that you wanted?

Sandbox · 23/12/2018 21:00

A lap dancer can’t dance for free- she pays 10-50% of the dance cost to the club and I don’t know any who would be happy paying to do their own dances

Strongmummy · 23/12/2018 21:00

@abucat - oh come on!!! A professional dancer or musician is PAID for their skill. They may do some freebies for charidee, but they make their living from their talent.

abacucat · 23/12/2018 21:00

And stripping for money for men to get sexual satisfaction, is always grim, and inherently exploitative.

Sandbox · 23/12/2018 21:01

Maybe try reading something that doesn’t fit into the little box of what you already believe

PengAly · 23/12/2018 21:01

Im involved in A LOT of feminist groups and activities. I know exactly what it is. You have no idea who i am so do not make statements like that to me.

Strongmummy · 23/12/2018 21:02

@abucat - grim? How insulting to the women who do it

Sandbox · 23/12/2018 21:02

I’m sure all the women making thousands for a couple of nights work really care about your opinion of them. It’s not exploitative. It can be, 99% of the time it’s not though.

Strongmummy · 23/12/2018 21:02

@abucat - and trust me, the women stripping are often getting satisfaction too!!!

Sandbox · 23/12/2018 21:04

Again I’ve stripped for men, women, couples, for groups and on stage. It’s not about seedy men wanting sexual gratification. Yes some do, for most it’s a laugh, it’s fun, it’s part of a fantasy (mainly for the woman!) for couples.

starcrossedseahorse · 23/12/2018 21:04

Feminism does not centre men Pen.

Sandbox · 23/12/2018 21:05

Women choosing to dance for men and women is not about men.

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