To ask if you think I should leave or keep trying?

[confusedatchristmas1]

My loving, happy, can't get enough of each other relationship has somehow turned into us basically just being housemates and I don't know how.

I'm pregnant (planned), and I knew things would change, but my DP has no interest in me since we got the positive result. Doesn't want to have sex, doesn't want to spend any time with me, gets really angry at me when I tell him that I'm upset with the way things have changed. And for a while I've just been plodding on and getting occasionally upset but the more time that passes, the less I want to even try. I'm struggling with the pregnancy in lots of ways (it's bloody hard work isn't it?! Women are great!) and feel like I've had zero support from him. And to be honest, I don't even want to spend time with the person he's become. I have booked us a surprise trip for after Christmas, which I hoped would bring us closer again, and now I'm lying in bed, alone with the flu whilst he sits downstairs drinking, alone, wondering if I should just get up and go tomorrow. I still love him but I don't think there's anything else I can try and I just don't see what I'd be missing.

I've spoken to him and he says things will be better when the baby comes, but I don't want to wait another 4 months to have my partner back.

Everyone has noticed he's completely different towards me too. His own family have asked why I've stuck around, and I'm running out of reasons now.

NO! Why would you help him? He’s been vile towards you!

He’s refused to talk to you or take any of your concerns seriously. It’s utterly ridiculous. I suspect you won’t see that money again. Even if you went to court what could they do if he’s got no money?

Have any of his family been in touch? Can they shed any light on things?

Not that it's any issue of yours now, but I get the impression from your posts that he was in the relationship because he wanted a baby. Once he had that secured (sort of) he stopped making any effort.
Any way, you've done the right thing. Stay strong and don't put him on the birth certificate. Let his family give him any help he needs. He's lost any rights to any of your sympathy or help because of his behaviour.

Please don't feel sorry for this awful excuse of a man. Loads of people have hell going on in their lives and they don't pour shit over their pregnant partner.
I see from your earlier post he had no problem reining himself in when others were around, nasty piece of shit that he is.
Don't give him an ounce of sympathy, he doesn't deserve it.

You have helped him already - you have given him the money you saved for yourself and your baby. Now he has lost/given up his job you realisically have no chance of seeing it again - sorry to be blunt.

He has been verbally, emotinally and financially abusive to you. Don't waste anymore time on this excuse for a man. As I say to my DD, if this was happening to your friend what would you be saying to her? Why should you treat yourself worse than you would let your friend be treated?

I don't think it's been spelled out why you should think very carefully about putting your partner's name on the birth certificate it is because as you are unmarried he does not automatically gain Parental Responsibility for your child (he can go to court to gain PR or you can enter into an agreement for him to gain this at a later date if you want to) but until he obtains PR you will be the only person who can make decisions about where your baby lives and with whom he/she has contact etc (Court Orders are the exception to this). Older friends and relatives might raise the idea that there is a stigma to having a space on the birth certificate or that the baby is his too. Think about the pros and cons to you and you child - seek legal advice if you need to, but make an informed choice

I half am starting to worry about him, the change in his personality, the not wanting to ever have sex, the sudden loss of the job

No, stop it! This is how he'll suck you back in, by making you feel sorry for him!

I don't think it's been spelled out why you should think very carefully about putting your partner's name on the birth certificate it is because as you are unmarried he does not automatically gain Parental Responsibility for your child (he can go to court to gain PR or you can enter into an agreement for him to gain this at a later date if you want to) but until he obtains PR you will be the only person who can make decisions about where your baby lives and with whom he/she has contact etc

In practical terms, once you stop BFing, he could demand to see the child, the refuse to give her back and - if his name is on the birth cert - you could find yourself in a position where there was nothing anyone could do as he's legally a parent just as much as you.

If his name's not on the birth cert and he tried any funny business like this, the law would be on your side and he would be forced to return your child.

Is he British/UK resident? Not sure if you've already been asked that.

Both UK residents.

Spoke to him today and he opened up a bit. He said that he can't help being more interested in gaming than having sex with me.

I told him he's got to sort his own life out and that I just can't do it anymore. Which I truly can't.

I do feel for him but he's an adult. He will be fine.

That's right, he an adult and only he con sort out his life.