To ask how long after childbirth...

[bella1426]

...it took to get 'back in the saddle' so to speak. 7 weeks PP and miss the closeness the physical side of our relationship brings but god knows when well have the energy, privacy or time to DTD again...not to mention the horrific thought of being seen naked like this...wondering what's the norm on this subject (if there is one!)

8 weeks after the first (had an episiotomy and the stitches then got infected so recovery took longer); 3 weeks after the second.

Previous norms about having sex in bed seemed to fly out the window once there was a baby sleeping in there too... get creative! Living room?!

About 5 years.

Between 3 and 6 weeks. I've had four very easy births with no stitches. I got pregnant when dc3 was about ten weeks old so my last two babies were very close together!

11 weeks , my episiotomy was too tender to even consider it before then

5 weeks. Had not been up to sex for pretty much the whole pregnancy and was absolutley gagging for it, and I have to admit sex is actually better since having DD, like it feels better. I’m very lucky.

Mine was about 6 months, I was stitched up too tight and had to go in for a procedure under ga to rectify it.

6 weeks exactly. I probably would have waited longer but it was our 1st wedding anniversary. I had an episiotomy but it was honestly fine on the pain front.

6 weeks. But had an elective c section which went very smoothly

Until I could get some birth control sorted.....about 8 weeks I think

We also didn’t have sex for most of my pregnancy. DH was horrified by the very idea that something co possibly hurt his long awaited baby

2 weeks, could never wait months

1st - 2 months but sporadically thereafter until about 6 months. Took me a while to feel like my normal self though.

2nd - 4 months as I was on my knees with exhaustion and quite miserable due to it. I didn't want sex at all. DH was wonderful about it.

3rd - currently 7 weeks pp and haven't done it yet, although we've had foreplay. I'm not as tired as I was with my second so it's more feasible from that perspective, although with 3 children I'm really worn out. I am however terrified about falling pregnant again as I fall pregnant very very easily (even when on contraception) and our family is now complete. I'm awaiting an appointment to discuss having a coil (DH has offered to have a vasectomy but if our finances changed we'd consider another), so I want to wait until I have my coil and will then double up contraception before having sex. Due to slow appointments I'm expecting it to be late January.

It's all irrelevant though because you need to wait until you're comfortable.

Shepherds I can’t get over how disgusting some men are.

Takes 40 weeks to grow a baby, and id argue a furthur 40 weeks to heal from the whole thing. I don't know about these woman who are says they had sex 3, 6, 9 weeks after birth. That sounds way too soon for me, utter madness!!! But each to their own.

Five and a half weeks, which was when I had stopped bleeding/ passing lochia. Just before my six week check. It was fine, I have never needed extra lubrication and didn’t then. We were both terrified and my dh was incredibly gentle. It was lovely and very reminiscent of my first time (also with dh).

About 6 weeks because I wanted to check it all still worked. Since then about 4 times and DS is 16 months old. Not perfect my partner but he never hassles about sex thankfully. DS is a rubbish sleeper and I’m knackered

Can't believe everyone's at it so quickly post birth!

8.5 months after first

4 months after second

I don’t blame you! Been reading your thread, you’re doing amazingly well.

With first - 1 week, baby slept fantastically and we hadn’t done it in a while as I had been uncomfortable and exhausted before birth.

Second baby - about 9 days. Felt great and was spending a lot of time snuggled up in bed together as it was winter, and Baby 1 was still a great sleeper sleeping from 7pm - 7am.

Minimal birth injuries both times.

There is no right or wrong answer. Perhaps like you I would have missed the physical side as it makes me feel safe and loved and brings us closer. Any pressure at such a vulnerable time would have been a possible relationship ender for me.

The bit I can’t believe is that OP’s DH hasn’t seen her naked post birth.

DH had to help me dress for a while after having my first. And then there’s bathing with the baby...and skin to skin and breastfeeding... and ‘airing’ the wounds, legs akimbo. Haha. I was naked a lot in the first few weeks post birth with all of mine!

I can’t really remember how long we waited. Definitely had some mega dry patches though. If you are missing feeling sexy, I hear you, it’s horrible feeling all used up from making a baby and like there’s no mojo left in you anymore.

That feeling doesn’t last forever though. You’ll get ‘you’ back. Takes a long time to recover from pregnancy and birth. Be kind to yourself.

Lizadork. I think everyone’s birth experience and healing from it is different. I had a dreadful pregnancy; but the world’s easiest birth (well, via c section) so felt totally fine at 6 weeks. However if I had a vaginal birth with tearing etc; i would probably have waited a lot longer

It was about 3-4 months both times.

Only about three weeks, I think. I had a planned CS that healed well. We’re not hugely sex focussed, but the hormones made me quite horny as far as I recall!