To just stop doing Christmas after this year?

[Cheekysquirrel]

I’m not religious. I don’t believe in god. I hate Christmas. I hate the tat in the shops, the music, the great big giving of crap no one needs, the food and drink (t1 diabetic so I can never even eat a Christmas lunch, much less a mince pie or a glass of wine), the lights, the waste of money for one day, the trees, having to see relatives I don’t really like, all of it really.

Imagine the happiness of just Not Doing It. Any of it. No more worrying about it, sending cards, buying shit, having to pretend to enjoy it. It’s just a massive hassle and the clutter and all the boxes and packaging afterwards drives me mad.

That’s it, I am done. The only issue I have is dh. He is very vaguely religious - believes in god in a half arsed way - but he and his family will never stop doing Christmas. How do I reconcile this alongside just stopping it? Usually I do all the gifts, the buying, the wrapping, filling the stockings, the decorating, the whole lot.

I've read your posts before. You're very negative and one of those people where it doesn't matter what people suggest, it's not good enough or not right. You can't stop doing Christmas because you have children and it's not fair. They enjoy it. Suck it up like the rest of us.

You don’t have to throw the baby out with the bath water.. stop doing the bits you don’t like... and keep the lovely magic bits. There’s no reason you can’t make yourself a lovely meal either .... if DH wants the big Christmas dinner you can’t have then he can cook it surely.
If you don’t want to see people you don’t like then don’t see them and don’t buy tat
It seems a shame not to do Christmas with children. I never had Christmas as my parents just didn’t do it and it was crap

Do you not have a specialist diabetic nurse/consultant?
You can't be starving yourself, no wonder you feel crap.

When he tell you to get something just say no. No cards, order dc's gifts on line together, share the wrapping, leave his family gifts for him to do, delegate the bloody elf to him too.

Are you the poster with the overweight husband?

So what if she is?

You sound really unhappy and feel unappreciated by the sounds of it. In your situation I'd want to pack everyone off to the in laws as well.

In any case your husband needs to pull his weight.

t1 diabetic so I can never even eat a Christmas lunch, much less a mince pie or a glass of wine),

Nothing wrong with Christmas lunch for a diabetic. Turkey and plenty of veg with a few spuds?

Stop celebrating Christmas OP. Let your kids go to your In-laws and enjoy it there. SORTED

Sorry Op just seen you have problems with your type of diabetes.

Yabu.

Mainly because you have children who are used to celebrating Christmas and it would be unfair to suddenly stop celebrating it as a family.

But you can scale things down a bit and ask your husband to take on more prep. Make food you can also enjoy or arrange to go out or have a takeaway to avoid the prep.

Although we had lovely Christmas days in the past, my children are young adults now and I haven't 'done' Christmas for a few years.

It's great.

No mindless expense, no tree, decorations, cards, gift giving/receiving and arguments with inlaws about 'hosting'.

It's a normal day in our household and we love it.

Could you compromise and make it more personal? Cook a meal you will all enjoy, give one or two gifts each (maybe one from you and one from Santa?) Bake a few treats for kids and get some favourite films and games out? So you aren't isolating the kids but you are stripping it all back? Childhood is so precious, its nice to make memories but I agree its very OTT this last few years. And getting worse.

I’m sorry but I think this is tied in with something else. It feels like you are depriving yourself of nutrition to a huge extent (I know you feel you have to, but perhaps you have taken it too far to the extreme), and perhaps this has contributed to how you feel in general? You should not need to never eat anything. It seems like your diabetes is particularly difficult to control and I comptetely sympathise (my daughter has it and she finds it very difficult and hers is quite manageable really). Have you tried the bootcamp threads here for support on the low carb, high fat way of eating? It is a godsend for diabetic control and you will feel 100% better if you can get a handle on that. You simply can’t survive on starvation rations, it will break you physically but also mentally.

I think there are other things to look into here. You can’t stop doing Christmas, because you have a child who is young enough to still really enjoy it. It wouldn’t be fair.

I think there is resentment, anger, frustration, maybe depression making you feel worse about things than you need to.

I think you need to tell your DH that you are tired of all the wifework that you do in relation to Christmas and that he will need to step up and do his share this year and for however many years he wishes to celebrate it.

And then I think you need to put a renewed effort into finding a way of eating that is viable for you. It must be hell the way you are doing it now.

So what if she is?
Erm, context actually, as there was a similar situation with a diabetic and food issues.
I don't want to repeat myself if that's ok with you

I loathe it and do it all. DH works insane hours, he is exhausted , I nearly lost it wrapping a mountain of presents today with wrapping paper the sellotape didn't stick to. I very rarely swear ( I did when no one was in the room). It is able time of year, the waste, the clutter , the invasion of the house......

Seems a bit mean for the kids to not do any of it, but maybe the best way to not do Christmas is to go on holidays instead.

Yanbu.

This year we are focusing on Yule. The feeling of celebrating the return of the Sun. Cosy blankets/storytelling/board games and fires. We are all sick of death of a commercial Christmas so cutting it right back.

We all feel happier as a result.

Do not over estimate how lovely the "memories" of Christmas are. My parents went over the top , it was disgusting, cluttersomes, messy , arguments occured. It would make me physically throw up, my mum thought it was excitement.

OP, you're going to get lots of posts advising you that you're not managing your diabetes properly, as per your previous thread...

Yep.
Cancel Xmas,tell the kids there is no santa

OP, your previous thread gave you a lot of advice with your diabetes. Type 1 diabetics can and do eat. You are living a shell of a life and I’m not surprised you don’t enjoy Christmas - is be amazed if you manage to enjoy anything given you survive off one slice of toast and some strawberries every day but you refused to engage in your previous thread about it. I don’t think the answer is you cancel Christmas, it’s for you to get help.

Just take some positives from the season..kids love it, giving, great food ( you can eat whatever you fancy), a bit of dun in the sark months and dont get sucked into the overhyped Christmas jumper, beauty advent calender, plastic rubbish tat.

Why can’t you have a Christmas dinner? I understand why you can’t stuff your face with pies and sweets etc but a lunch? What do you usually eat? Is is radically different from that?

If you have DC who is still young enough to believe in Father Christmas it would be awful to suddenly stop doing Christmas for them.

Tell DH to sort his own family gifts out or tell them you are no longer buying for adults and then just buy for your DC. Book somewhere out to eat next Christmas or else have something different or something pre prepared so you aren’t slaving away all day.

I hate Christmas in its current disgraceful format. I’m surprised your dh, if he is religious, thinks that the appalling waste and fakery is ok.