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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What would you think of your dd age 11 went on a sleepover, and three kids were all in the birthday child’s room and your child slept on the landing alone ?

169 replies

LardLizard · 08/12/2018 23:42

?

OP posts:
Original poster
LardLizard · 08/12/2018 23:43

Apparently wasn’t enough space for all four kids to sleep in the bedroom
Don’t know why they did separate it to at least two on landing and two in bedroom

OP posts:
HollowTalk · 08/12/2018 23:43

I would want to know what the hell had been going on. If my child had been misbehaving, I would have wanted a call so that I could bring them home. Otherwise it looks awful - like bullying.

MardyArabella · 08/12/2018 23:43

did she volunteer to be on the landing?

WendyWoofer · 08/12/2018 23:44

What's the full story?

DeusEx · 08/12/2018 23:44

Looks like bullying...who told you the no room line?

Hope she is ok Flowers

Original poster
LardLizard · 08/12/2018 23:47

Dd slept in the landing while hearing them laughing and joking n talking in the room

Even the birthday girls mum said it was because there was not enough room in her bedroom

OP posts:
Original poster
LardLizard · 08/12/2018 23:48

Dd seems really upset about it so obv b much doubt she volunteered

OP posts:
BarbarianMum · 08/12/2018 23:48

I would be furious. The whole point of sleepovers is that you sleep in the same room. Living room or dini g room in sleeping bags if the bedroom isn't big enough (or invite fewer people).

PippilottaLongstocking · 08/12/2018 23:49

They knew how big the room is, they should have known that four children wouldn’t fit. Definitely looks like bullying Flowers

arethereanyleftatall · 08/12/2018 23:49

Was there only space for one on the landing?
Seems a bit cruel though.
Unless they were just all on the floor and the bedroom door was open so the landing is just as extension of the room.

I can really easily see how this happened tbh. I'm embarrassed to admit, dd currently has two friends over for a birthday sleepover right now, and up until 2 hours ago, I gave it zero thought where I was going to put them. Wasn't malicious, just didn't think. There's only bunk beds in dds room, so they've all gone in to the double guest room bed.

arethereanyleftatall · 08/12/2018 23:50

Cross post with ages ago, sorry.

paintinmyhairAgain · 08/12/2018 23:50

this wasn't thought out very well by the parents of birthday girl.

incallthebloodytime · 08/12/2018 23:51

Looks very like bullying but I'd ask the mum what happened first before coming to any conclusion

BlueSuffragette · 08/12/2018 23:51

I'd have it out with the mum. Why did she invite more girls than she had space for? Why didn't they all sleep in the lounge? Your poor DD. Friend and her mum sound really mean.

WhiteDust · 08/12/2018 23:57

I'd think: horrible friend, horrible mum, rubbish 'party'.
I'd tell my DD this and make sure that she knows that the problem is theirs not hers. I'd also advise her to spread her wings and look out for nicer friends.

OHolyNightOwl · 08/12/2018 23:59

That is so shit. Agree with WhiteDust.

Dollymixture22 · 09/12/2018 00:04

Girls can be nasty, but the parents were aware of the situation - shame on them.

Your little girl shouldn’t go to this house again, the parents are either totally clueless or mean. I remember a friend at that age whosever mum got sucked into all the mean girl stuff and would have found this sort of thing funny, she was and still is a complete bitch!! No wonder her daughter was a bully.

RestingButchFace · 09/12/2018 00:07

I would be furious. I have a tiny house and when my Dd1 was 11 and wanTed a birthday sleepover I worked out how many girls would fit in the living room and sofas and mattresses on the floor. I explained we couldn't go over that number. They topped and tailed on my 2 sofas and 2 shared a king size matress I dragged down the stairs. I would never ever have left anyone on the landing.
If my dd couldn't have chosen who not to invite then she would have had to be the one to leave the room and get in with me. Fucking disgraceful behaviour,I hope you dd is ok and not too upset

southnownorth · 09/12/2018 00:07

It's very cruel and I wouldn't let my dd there again.

Hope she ok bless her!

AcrossthePond55 · 09/12/2018 00:09

That’s horrible! But before I contacted the other mum I think I’d see what my DD wanted. Although she’s upset, she may not want it taken further.

Lynne45 · 09/12/2018 00:10

Your poor daughter. I remember having sleepovers, we’d all sleep on the floor on top of sofa cushions and a mattress - squashed as anything but part of the fun. Sounds like a deliberate attempt to leave her out.

KnightlyMyMan · 09/12/2018 00:12

Oh god - shocking parental behaviour. If they don’t fit in the bedroom then obvious answer is all in the living room!

RestingButchFace · 09/12/2018 00:14

Lynne my point exactly. The girls at mine were like sardines but loved it. There was no way they would fit in Dd1 s room so matress and sofas it was and they loved it.

MsTSwift · 09/12/2018 00:17

Your poor dd. We recently had the pleasure of dd (10) being invited to an afternoon birthday activity then the only one not invited for the sleepover which the birthday girls described to dd with relish.

Dd explained this to her elderly and rather grand maths tutor who announced that the other girl “was a little bitch” which we felt was quite correct though not pc Grin

civicxx · 09/12/2018 00:18

If my daughter was made to sleep alone on a landing I'd of absolutely lost my shit. Hope she's ok