AIBU to wonder when woman started obsessing over their lady garden?

[Hellsbells35]

I had the misfortune of watching Naked Attraction and was shocked at the lack of pubes...and how people were berated for having a postage stamp sized amount. The men’s view also seemed to be strange where there was a definite trend for those looking like a plucked turkey.

I dabbled with a Brazilian when I was in my twenties but soon stopped when I realised it was a complete waste of time and money.

I now have a full bush and I love it. I really don’t see the appeal of shaving/waxing to have horrid regrowth and ingrown hairs or to look like a child.

AIBU to think we should all band together and let our lady gardens flourish to turn the tide on this degrading trend?

Mothers are probably not the main ones doing the teaching. It is more likely to be by friends at school or early sexual partners.

The thing is, if you are born into an era where you get the message that pubic hair is "disgusting", that will have an impact, even subconsciously. I was born into an era where hairy legs were a no no, so I shaved. The hair wouldn't have bothered me if I'm being totally honest but it was the cultural norm not to have hairy legs so I didn't. Shows liked naked attraction send the message that it's not ok to have pubic hair. I have watched it once, and the one time I did a man rejected a woman for her pubic hair, and she was well groomed! She only had a small strip! That's just one show. If teenage girls are hearing all around them that pubic hair is unacceptable then yes they will shave. They might well say its their "choice", same as it was my choice to shave my legs, but it isn't really a choice. Whilst I respect a woman's (and man's) wish to hair their hair any way they want, I don't like the pressure put on people to conform.

I am v anti porn though I have seen only tiny amounts of it. I define as a feminist in every way. Bit you know, bodily autonomy is a thing so I'm still going to remove the hair.

Arguing that we don't know our own minds is a bit daft as you can extend all that to every aspect of grooming. Victorian's has Beth's a few times a year didn't they? Is bathing daily now massively frivolous and pathetic because we have all caved into fashion then?

*have their hair, not hair their hair!

Is bathing daily now massively frivolous and pathetic because we have all caved into fashion then

Actually when you really think about it, yes! Look at how people react with horror and disgust if someone says they don't shower or bathe daily? I've seen it here on other threads discussing that very issue! But really we don't "need" to bath daily. Wash yes, but you don't "need" a shower/bath every day but society expects it.

I disagree about porn not being about years ago ; it just meant that people had to go to out the 'special shops ' that stocked the magazines and they could also arrange for videos to be sent mail order. I worked with a few men in my old office who did this and they would nip out at lunchtimes to buy them ; nicely put in brown paper bags and hidden away in the their desks : then wait for the post.
It's always been about ; just easier now it's on the internet.
I do shave ( when I remember) but the thought of waxing leaves me cold! Too painful.

I trimmed it a few times and got an awful ingrown hair. It was so painful. I must leave it alone now, embrace the bush!

I used to shave it all and not by choice but was made to. I agree that women shouldn’t be told what to do with their own body hair and shouldn’t feel pressure to shave it all off because it’s the done thing, equally they shouldn’t be made to keep it if they don’t like it, it’s always the woman’s choice first and foremost, in a perfect world anyway, I know from experience reality for a lot of us can be much different.

Nowadays I switch back and forth between tamed but definitely hairy and bald depending on my own preference.

Meeting my husband was the catalyst with this one, I left it a bit longer than normal one week when we were first together so there was a small dusting of short hair. I was embarrassed to have sex that day because I hadn’t shaved. He soon put paid to that nonsense by telling me he actually prefers hair down there and I didn’t need to feel embarrassed just because I hadn’t found the time to remove something natural. That’s sort of a running theme with him in lots of things - “it’s natural, why get embarrassed about it?”

Now I leave it grow when I want to and shave it all off every so often when I fancy a change, even though his preference is for hair I do what I want and sometimes I do want it to be bald - the feeling is nice sometimes, and I like the extra sensitivity but at the same time I just cant be bothered to remove it most of the time and it no longer bothers me having it there - mainly because I don’t feel shamed or dirty for leaving it.

I’m lucky enough not to get ingrowing hair when I do shave anymore, I used to a lot when I did it regularly, but I think that’s just luck of the draw with my own skin and also maybe the fact I let it grow out a lot now between each shave.

And with swim wear, I think most women shave anything that pokes out of the sides, but at the same time are other women really going to judge each other for having a couple of strays? Who really gives a shit? It’s body hair, I couldn’t give a monkeys about what anyone chooses to do with theirs be it pubic hair or leg hair.

My partner trims his pubic hair and prefers not to have chest hair. I’m happy with that. He also has a huge beard and moustache, again personal preference and I don’t really get the aversion some people on here have to facial hair on men, I find it very attractive, but life would be boring if we all had the same preferences.

I have pubic hair because I don’t really like the way my genitals look, and it covers it up to a certain extent.

I trim regularly but i’m about to treat myself to a trimmer in the January sales as sissors take too long and I want it to be even. Any suggestions for a good one?

Waxing isn't more hygenic as it disturbs and exposes the hair roots so you are way more likely to get an infected follicle if you wax. If your minge is dirty, have a wash.

I had a nasty, pervy lawyer (called Donald btw, in case you meet him) grope me and say "I saw a 70s style bush the other day" - it does seem to me to be all about men's jugments and tastes changing, driven by porn, and about them imposing that on women.

A bit of neatening and trimmage is fair enough though.

Yes, have autonomy and make up your own mind. But also if you find being so well groomed a difficult thing to keep up all the time, consider why you are doing it. If you really prefer it and it's worth the trouble, then that's ok.

When I was at school, we had to have shared showers. I was a very late developer and can still remember being a little traumatised by another more developed girl who had shaved but now had a prickly black stubble.

Of course that had an effect on me. I could have decided that I would shave more thoroughly than her and be sure to do it every day. But I went the other way and decided that it was a bad idea to do it at all. That way, there is never the possibility of prickliness.

I just hate the idea of fending off a hedgehog effect.

@Safeandwarm I use a male body trimmer, the Phillips one blade. Comes with a few different length attachment combs. I find it better than the female versions and less skin irritation. You can use the bare blade too and it’s never cut me accidentally unlike a women’s trimmer I had once.

Thanks a lot Anniversary

People can do what they want. I don't shave anything. Sometimes I shave my legs before a summer holiday.

I remember reading books about mechanised non natural childbirth int he 1970s and books against that too and not liking the fact some hospitals apparently then would shave women and give them an enema before birth. However when I gave birth first in 1984 there was no shaving going on and you could be exactly as you wanted to be for an NHS hospital birth - totally natural state. Public hair can be safer and is natural too but each individual should be able to decide themselves just as my sons have decided to have beards (I don't like beards but it's their faces).

Half the posters on the thread have made pretty offensive remarks. Why are you singling that one out?

Caught my eye in its exquisite unreason

Personal preference, I prefer to wax if I'm swimming etc as hair grows quite extensively down my upper thigh. Waxing means no stubble btw, shaving is horrible I find. I go about every 10-12 weeks so not obsessively

When did I start hair removal? When I lost most of it through illness and the small amount of regrowth was ridiculous.

I really don’t see the appeal of shaving/waxing to have horrid regrowth and ingrown hairs or to look like a child

I've never had ingrowing hairs. The "look like a child" thing is so nonsensical. I'm an adult woman. I have breasts, hips, post-childbirth genitalia. Having no hair doesn't erase that.

Never seen naked attraction but will.

I like a full Bush.

Here's an interesting video on the topic.

Personally, I'd say, any bloke a woman let's near to her thatching should be grateful and not be judging the handiwork.

I trim and shape mine into something manageable. After the last couple of times I tried a Hollywood I ended up with folliculitis so I only do mine when strictly necessary now - same for any shaving.

My DM and DSis think I'm an animal and DM has made comments about me not taking pride in my appearance or loving my body, but she doesn't get that for me body positivity and loving my body means not putting myself at risk of infection any more than I have to. Both DM and DSis are redheads - DM only does the edges of her bikini line, DSis removes all of hers as she's under 30. I'm very dark haired but fair skinned and definitely have more and coarser hair than they do, they just don't get that I have a different set of challenges to them.

I hate the shaved look on blokes. Even if it does make their cock look bigger.

I have a full bush.

I really don’t understand why it could be considered unhygienic? Whenever I shower or bathe I wash my pubic hair. If I don’t shower or bathe, then I will wash myself at the sink. Even if I don’t whenever I wee the only part of me that needs wiping is minimal drips inside my labia, where there is no hair. If I have a poo the only bit that needs wiping is not near my pubic hair either. When i’m On my period I use a mooncup so there is no mess , but even if I was using pads, the blood would only ever reach my pubes if I wasn’t changing them regularly as my labial lips contain it. In fact in that case I think it would be messier to not have pubes there to absorb some blood and then be washed. I guess that sometimes my bush will get damp if i’m Having sex or am feeling turned on, but i’ve Always found that sexy and so have any lovers i’ve Had. And ofcourse, very simple to wash pubes after!

Why on Earth is it unhygienic? What am I missing?

If you see something on screen whether that's a TV prog or porn, you are going to think it's the norm, if it's something you don't see very often in real life.

I have only ever seen a few women's bushes; that was when I played sport and we went into the showers afterwards, changing rooms etc. Maybe if you use the gym you will see the same these days.

No one- this was the 70s and 80s- shaved or whatever.

Porn was only in lads' mags and even then the women had bushes.

When DD started puberty and went swimming with school, she asked to buy a razor for her armpits. I agreed. She asked if she ought to shave her pubes. I said no, women leave them alone.

I don't know what she does now.

I think to deny it's a fashion, is missing the point. If you were my age and knew when women didn't do it, you'd see how now it's a fashion most probably influenced by porn stars, young boys who see porn and think shaved = normal, and who make silly comments about not liking hair, and young girls who feel they have to comply.

There is no reason to get rid of pubic hair. I admit there is societal pressure- I'd not be happy going sleeveless with hairy underarms- but also, getting rid of hair does help anti perspirant to 'stick' to skin better. You can't use the same argument for pubes though because a) they arent' on show and b)it's been proved that hair there is a good thing re. health.

I trim and shape mine into something manageable

I’m confused when people talk about “manageability” of pubes. I’m also pretty confused by the idea that swimming costumes pose a major issue to those going au naturelle

I know im not hirsute, but im beginning to think that my hair growing powers are truly feeble.

Could it just be that hairy peiple are mote likely to get seriously into hair removal?

Where does the influence of porn stop? Arsehole bleaching, labia trimming? Porn stars pudendas are entirely unnatural.

And don't get me started on guys who shave to try to make their cock look longer. I do not want to fuck an optical illusion thanks.