Insufferably selfish things your OH does...

[Munchkingoat]

Whenever my exh used to pick up a Chinese takeaway he would eat ALL the prawn crackers on the way home from picking it up. This used to drive me insane as I could never fathom how anyone could do so selfish when he knew I loved them and he would NEVER get two lots no matter how often I asked. Utter nob.

I was thinking about this whilst driving home yesterday and it still gives me the rage 12 years after divorcing him!

What Brugel said. I learned before marrying DH from selfish boyfriends that I wasn't going to put up with dickheads.

These are just a few examples; he has generally been unable to put anyone else first, due to MH issues.

Bullshit! Minimising and apologising for this arse whilst showing your kids they deserve to be treated like shit by the one who's supposed to be treating them with unconditional love. This is how people grow up to put up with shit excuses for relationships. How sad.

Every single post on here is awful. Such sad stories. Why are you with these cruel shitheads?

about 11pm I was in agony and crying, woke him up and said I’m going to have to go to a&e - his words ‘Id come with you but I’m so tired’ confused so I get out have to move his van as he was blocking me in, got my car out parked the van again, drove myself to a & e.

What. The. Actual. F**K.

I am sitting here open mouthed in shock. Complete arsehole!! That is beyond selfish... Are you actually still with this person???

Can l ask why, truly you are still with these men? Please don't say it's cos you 'love' them as l can't imagine ever loving someone who could treat me so awful.

Do you really love the characteristics of these individuals - nasty, selfish, uncaring....

@GummyGoddess he sort of mumbled "Oh...erm....I thought he had [been crying ages]"
I then went off to deal with the baby.

I didn't challenge it further at the time. I generally felt very resentful towards dh during that period (with good reason, I now realise) so I wasn't that shocked by his nastiness. Things are better now, because both children are easier so life is easier, but the way he behaved back then has always stuck in my mind. I would never have another child with him.

EllaEllaE i am still with him, sometimes wonder why! Been together nearly 5 years, since I was 19.

onthenaughtystepagain
"At what point do you intend to let this be or do you enjoy upsetting yourself about old trivia"

Oh for goodness sake I hadn't thought about it in years but popped into my head yesterday as i was thinking about getting a takeaway and then I thought it might make an interesting topic.

I'm quite alright thanks very much - i do manage not to cry into my pillow every night.

It's a thread for the worst examples, that was my worst! If he was consistently selfish then I would be gone.

When l was working early shifts and getting up at 5am, my (now ex) husband would keep me awake til gone two am, just generally wandering round the house, shutting doors loudly, switching lights on, using the printer in the next bedroom, etc.
Yet when l was on late shifts and came in after midnight, invariably he'd be in bed. l'd hear him snoring when l opened the front door, so it wasn't staged.
When we were splitting up he admitted he did it on purpose.

Is that not the most breathtaking display of cuntish behaviour??!!!
It's pretty much right up there.

Some of these are shocking.
And to those who don't put up with it and they are Ex's - good on ya!
Those who are still putting up with this shite.... For the love of god - LEAVE!!!!!! Or kick them out.
Just - wow!!!!!

@katseyes7

Did he tell you why he did it on purpose? Was he jealous of your career? Wanted to split up so was doing it to make you be the one to leave? Why would he do that!

The day isn't long enough to write about all the selfish things my ex did but here's one. I prepared all his meals. If I was ever busy when he wanted a meal - particularly when dealing with a tiny baby - he would make himself something to eat and not even think about me.

Some people have such a low bar it's so sad. And they'll be back with this 'he's a good dad' 'he's got a lot of plus points'. Where do you learn to put up with selfish cunts? 'Oh, but if you're too picky you'll get no one.' First of all, bullshit, and secondly, I'd much prefer being alone and a lone parent that having a selfish twat for a so-called spouse.

@notagoodname - maybe you are with him out of habit? You are far to young to be settling for someone who treats you with contempt and is actively nasty to you. That's not just him being selfish. It's him treating you like total crap.

Mine insists his car should be on the drive even though the on street parking during the day is really tricky (I'm a sahm) - it's an ongoing and long running battle that has him saying " I nearly drove into your car" every evening I use and stay on the drive. Petty but really annoying!

@Holstenlane lt was during the run up to us splitting up. l had a managerial support staff role with the police, he had much more potential than me but he was very lazy. One of our mutual friends (who has 3 post grad degrees) once said to me "He's got a much better brain than me, l don't understand why he doesn't use it".

He once complained that my shifts "f**ing rule our lives" but didn't seem to have a problem that they paid for a detached house and a new car each. l earned almost double what he did because of the shift/weekend allowances.

l used to get so tired l'd end up spending my days off sleeping. lt was lovely when we split up and l lived on my own and could go to bed when l liked!

@ravenmum i think that might be it. I know it sounds horrible but they are the only two times I can think he’s been selfish. He owns our house (bought before we met) and I’ve lived there about 4 years and he’s never asked for contribution for bills despite me offering. He bought me a car when mine broke and wasn’t worth fixing and didn’t ask for money for it (i insure, tax etc). He’s very generous every other way it’s just like he doesn’t know how to act when I’m ill/not myself

Some of these posts are awful. My examples were all nipped in the bud or apologised for, I think its thoughtlessness or perhaps I'm making excuses? Maybe I'm asking too much, not sure.

My commute is 3.5 hours a day. he'd be off in the week. My car heating broke and I couldn't afford to fix it so I went a winter before sorting it. I leave at 6.30 to beat rush hour so would be in the dark scraping and putting the distinctly cool blowers on. He didn't offer me the use of his car, with fully functioning heating and windscreen demisting, despite not using it. Some mornings it dropped to -7 on my rural route. My fingers and toes hurt on these days. When I asked him why he hadn't offered he admitted he didn't want me driving it (it's nothing fancy, but importantly works).

When I returned from maternity he was in a new job 1 mile from home. I was still commuting. I was expected to do the childcare drop off and pick up from my mums, adding 1hr on to my day. Because it's "on your way". No, it's not, in fact it's the opposite direction. Its 20 minute drive from our house. We now share this.

When I had our first child it ended up in a cat 1 c section. Prior to this I'd laboured all the previous night. As soon as I got moved to the ward, around 6pm, still catheterised, hadn't eaten, couldn't move etc, he went home so he could catch up on sleep. He was an hour later than visiting started the next day, but managed to not bring anything with him such a gift for our new child or food/token item for me (I wrongly thought this could be what held him up!)

Leaves tissues, tops of milk bottles, food wrappers on the counter multiple times a day

When we were dating he lived with his parents and I lived alone. I got the flu and begged him to buy me some soup or something and bring it over as I couldn't move from bed as felt so rotten. No, he was having an evening at home to himself. Two weeks later his mum got the same thing. He rang me on the Friday to say we had to stay at his house and cancel our plans to keep his mum company as she was really poorly and he felt bad for her...his dad was home...

That was long. Sorry. Quite cathartic.

OMG these are awful. DH is fab, thoughtful and kind. It occasionally annoys me when he makes flapjacks for his sport he should make more of them. That is the worst thing I can think of.

Took me to a & e once & just left me there by myself.
Hogs the tv.
Won't walk the dogs - even when i broke my toe.

These are legitimately awful.

And makes me realise that I’m with a very selfless man - the worst I could think of was that he finished the bottle of lemonade yesterday but offered to go out and get another one.

I'm quite greedy, but you get a lot of prawn crackers with a Chinese, and they are quite oily. That is definitely greedy bastard territory to eat them all on the way home!

I had a bad pregnancy with dd3 and was high risk. Exp made it to 2 scans but all the others including speaking to consultant about possible problems she could have I went to on my on with our ds who was a toddler. Last appointment and scan at 38 weeks was told she hadn't grown at all in 2 weeks and I was going to be induced soonest they could book me in was 3 days away.
Exp had arranged parental leave I rang and told him ( we had split and wasn't living together) he went mad as it was too short notice and I was bang out of order was arranging it with out him giving the ok . He did actually make it to her birth the only 1 the others he was too busy as he had made arrangements and they didn't come on their due dates.

notagoodname do you do more of the housework/laundry/cooking etc than he does?

When I pick up ds after work I come home and make dinner for everyone. When he picks up ds after work (less often, he works longer hours generally) he only makes food for the two of them. When I challenge him he says "I didn't know what you would want". I have pointed out that he owns a phone and his fingers aren't broken .