Moral Dilemma - to sell this and pocket the cash?

[PersonaNonGarter]

I have a moral dilemma.

A Sponging Relative (‘SR’) has run up so much debt that he has finally been evicted from his property and is likely to be made bankrupt shortly. He is also a massive hoarder. Recently, my aunt went to visit SR and suggested he part with some toys rather than pack them before eviction. The toys were given to my DC.

The toys turn out to be worth a lot of money and I will sell them rather than have them take up space - DC aren’t going to play with them. Should I :

1. Pocket the cash and give it to my DC on some way like a holiday
2. Give it to the very skint SR
3. Give the cash to some of the people SR has sponged off.

He doesn’t sponge off me although he has tried. In law, I know they were a gift and are mine/DCs. But morally...?

I see this is a dilemma for you. Seems like relative has issues or would not be in the situation. Be kind and honest tell them and your Aunt they may be fine with it and tell you to keep the toys/profit. Why did you accept the toys and if I am not mistaken the other items. Whether situation brought on by relative or not, benefiting from someone's bad situation is unpleasant, unnecessary and dishonest.

Show us the toys!

I would keep a few that the kids like most and sell the rest and keep the money. Don't over think it. They don't want them and gifted them to you. It's up to you now.

What about keeping in cupboard for your kids to decide in a Few years? Will they go up in value!?

Just sell them and keep the money. Help someone out if you can.

1. It’s immoral to pocket the cash.

Option 2.

If you are sure SR would use money wisely then (2). Failing that then (3).

I imagine that second hand toys have a very poor value indeed and I wold be very surprised if you got anything like you think. Donate them to charity and forget about them.

Abso-fucking-lutely this!

“TrippingTheVelvet

He's never sponged off you but you know he's being made bankrupt and have gained some of his possessions that are actually worth money and you want to keep it. That's outrageous! Do the right thing and give him them back and explain that they're worth money.”

You seem like a bit of a shitty person. Who accepts expensive items (from a skint person) that they don't actually want and then thinks it's ok to sell them on? It isn't your business to pay back his owed money. Give the items back to him, explain they are worth some money and leave him to deal with it.

Agreed.

1. Why should you keep the money yourself?

Tell the aunt.... life after bankruptcy can be hell, he will probably need to make repayments for 3yrs afterwards... They gave you them in good faith. Karma.....

As a LL l felt very sick to read rent arrears of 39K...how has the property not been repossessed? Must be a very wealthy LL

Sell but keep money in separate account until after bankruptcy etc, at that point you can judge who is most worthy of the money, or just treat the many relatives caught up in the mess to a nice dinner maybe?

I imagine that second hand toys have a very poor value indeed and I wold be very surprised if you got anything like you think. Donate them to charity and forget about them.

That’s a ridiculously blanket statement. Collectible toys in good condition can be worth a fortune.

2 when they were given to your dc your SR may not have realised their worth. He will find cash useful if he has fallen on hard times. I am surprised you would need to ask this.

You call him Sponging Relative. Do any of your family members call you 'Judgemental Relative'? The toys were given to your children, not to you, and I bet they'd be playing with them now if you hadn't gone on eBay to see how much they're worth. Give them back to your aunt, let her know what they're worth and let her decide the best way forward.

I imagine that second hand toys have a very poor value indeed and I wold be very surprised if you got anything like you think. Donate them to charity and forget about them.

Why would you say that? The OP has admitted they may even have undervalued them at 2k, and that they are still in original boxes. Vintage toys is a huge collectable market and prices for some items can be insane.

Sell the toys. Put the money aside to see how things pan out.

Seems to me a lot of people on here are getting on a high horse about a bunch of toys. If he or your aunt had wanted them, they wouldn’t have passed them on. I’d probably keep them in the loft or something for a bit whilst you work out what to do.

Give it back to him. The only fair option. Not your job to pay creditors

Personally i would sell the toys, keep the costs for packaging and posting plus a small amount for the time and effort then send the rest to the aunt to decide whether or not SR gets it or she does if she is the one currently having to be responsible for him.

Seriously? A few years ago I sold a bunch of my old toys. My original 80s my little pony stuff added up to over £500. The original polly pockets another £200. Then there was the Lego I don’t even remember how much that added up to. I funded a new car by selling off my childhood toys.

If for example some of those toys are Star Wars figures in packaging from the 70s then that’s easily thousands of pounds.

either sell them and put the money away for your kids or sit on them a bit longer to see if they increase in price, assuming of course that your kids have no interest in them. I don't think you are doing anything wrong as they were given to your kids, up to you what you do with them. If you feel too guilty doing that then the only other option in my eyes is to contact him and let him know they are worth money so does he still want you to have them, if not find a way to get them back to him or ask him to collect them.