to feel humiliated by mums leaving pub tables in a state

[Servernotslave]

I’m a waitress and today I felt so demoralised by the state the the table was left in by a group of 4 mums out for a £6.99 sandwich meal deal in the chain pub I work in; High chairs left caked in food, the floor covered in rice and grated cheese and other snacks, used wet wipes all over the table but not used to clean up even a tiny bit.

My children are 11&12 now but I never would have left a table like that, I’d have asked for a dustpan or if they offered to clean it I’d have left a tip and apologised.

I’m overworked and underpaid like a lot of jobs, I used to be a buyer in London but following a shit divorce i waitress locally because it currently fits in with the kids. I’m a smiley person and do my best to give really good service and go the extra mile however I couldn’t hide my disdain today and noticed one of the women had left her bank card on the floor, I ran out of to the car park to hand it back and said “Whilst I was picking your food off the floor I found this”.
She said thanks but tbh I wish I’d just left it behind bar so she would be inconvenienced collecting it- it’s so unlike me to think like this.

It took me 15 minutes to make the table presentable again whilst I also had food to run and other customers to serve- 25 other tables actually! I’m really questioning how a group of mums with toddlers made me feel so worthless.

Another table had left quavers all over the windowsill and another table had let their kids snap crayons everywhere.

It’s normally a nice pub with a great regular clientele but now I’m just dreading the build up to Christmas if it’s going to be like this every shift as more mums pile for get togethers and give no thought to how it feels to pick up mess like this in front of other customers.

AIBU to expect people to have a bit more decorum or is it my job unconditionally?

Worriedmummybekind You say they cleaned the table with wet wipes so not like they have totally left it dirty.

Re-read the OP it clearly says:

used wet wipes all over the table but not used to clean up even a tiny bit.

Why don't you get a cloth and a plastic bag and a spray bottle with flash or jif? Put all the rubbish in the bag, put all the crockery in the kitchen, give the table a quick spray and use the cloth to wipe the table. Then move on to the next table and repeat.
That way you will have total job satisfaction.

Any left over Quavers are always tasty
in a sandwich.

RedDogsBeg ah yes. Makes more sense now

Sorry OP, I though they had cleaned the table fully with wet wipes but the floor was dirty.... must read more carefully!

You say they cleaned the table with wet wipes so not like they have totally left it dirty.

Op didnt say they had wiped the table just that wey wipes were left all over the table

We get that a lot. Mess everywhere, used wet wipes, empty wet wipe packets, just dumped and left for us to pick up yeuk
People are gross.

Damm x posted.

Why don't you get a cloth and a plastic bag and a spray bottle with flash or jif? Put all the rubbish in the bag, put all the crockery in the kitchen, give the table a quick spray and use the cloth to wipe the table. Then move on to the next table and repeat.

1. Why should we use plastic bags when we are supposed to be cutting down on thier use because someone else is too freaking lazy to put something in a bin?
2. we have to clean tables as per rules set by boss and that means as quickly as poss not faff around with bags and bottles. How lovely for other customers to be moving between tables with carrier bags full of rubbish and old food!
3. if people weren't so freaking disgusting in the first place we wouldnt have to.do it.

YANBU but my almost 10 month old throws food off his high chair and while I try to get everything, he sometimes has crying fits and I try to make a speedy exit. On balance I think it's better I leave things a little messy than have him disturb the other diners.

That's disgusting. When my children were using finger food as babies of course it went everywhere, and they were brilliant at our local Wagamamas where I used to meet my mummy friends (noodles everywhere!) but we always used to ask for a dustpan and cleaned up with antibac wipes that I used to carry around too.

I worked as a waitress years ago. A child vomited over the table and floor. The parents sat and watched me clean it up and not a word of thanks was uttered.

I am always disgusted that so many people leave rubbish around their seat in cinemas. Why not just take it with you and deposit it in the bin that is by the entrance? Disgusting.

I also worked as a maid in a hotel once. I now always put all my used towels in one pile, sometimes strip the bed and ensure all rubbish is in bins.

Op, you are missing out that going out is different to having a meal in. Someone else will clear the table after you.

I wouldn't leave the table in a big mess, but wouldn't leave it spotless either. Last time I took my baby to a restaurant, she delighted in sucking the bread, then throwing it on the floor. The waiters were giving her this bread. I tried to pick it up at the end but they stopped me. The expectation was that you don't clean after yourself or your baby in a restaurant.

I have been there too OP, the worst was getting to a table like that and slipping over in a pile of child's vomit - explains why they buggered off sharpish without so much as a word 😡

I worked as a waitress, in bars, and as a chambermaid in my younger years, and had to conclude that some people are dirty, thoughtless and entitled. It’s an eye opener working in the service industry, that’s for sure!

We always tidy up as much as possible when out with our unruly toddler and I nearly always end up on my hands and knees.

DM used to be the manager at a high end department store restaurant often frequented by WAGs. She said they were the worst, left dirty nappies on the table after they'd eaten and toys specifically bought to entertain the kids whilst they lunched.

No one deserves to deal with my kids dirty nappies.

YANBU OP. I hate people who do this. I’m always really self conscious eating out with weaning babies or toddlers anyway, they do drop a lot of food, it’s our job to pick it up! I would be mortified at leaving that sort of mess for a waitress to clean up.

I usually do 2/3 quick sweeps under the high chair during the meal as well. Takes 30 seconds, I can’t bear the thought that the waiting on staff are watching us thinking that we will leave a big mess behind us.

I don’t fully clean the table or anything but I pick up dropped food and put it back on a plate, put wet wipes in a nappy bag and take it to the bin, remove food from the high chair and give it a quick wipe down. Essentially I try to leave the table in the same state it would be had sensible, non-messy adults been eating there.

In the past people did not take children out to cafes/restaurants. Children were expected to behave when they did.

It is totally unreasonable to take badly behaved children out and inflict them on the public, there is a small place locally where groups of entitled mothers sit for ages over one coffee with prams if they can sneak them in, they also put put adults off coming in and actually spending money. They are also rude to the staff.

We go to the child free place further down the street.

Yanbu. At all. Sheer laziness.

It isn't a reflection on you, but them though.

@omygoodness
What a bizarre comment, that's presumably what the OP did do, clean the table?

I've always cleared the worst up and bunched it up to the end so it shouldn't be any worse than the routine clearing after adults. Staff shouldn't have to wade through squelchy dropped food before they can even access the table.

I encountered this recently where a family of young children just left in a busy cafe leaving food liberally strewn all over the floor, chairs, high chairs and table. I doubt any made it as far as the toddlers mouths! It was the only table avaliable and couldn't be approached for a few minutes until the staff. I'm used to mess. I'm investigating if my older child has SNs, one of my concerns is his skill at eating efficiently as it's still like a toddler has been eating; we also did BLW, but I haven't seen carnage like that just abandoned before. May be it's that I frequented places like Morrisons rather than more upmarket coffee shops encouraging more entitlement.

It is the entitlement and lack of care. Because we were appologetic and dealt with the majority to return it to a reasonable state of usage, staff were very pleasant and often told us not to worry about what was left even if we hadn't got very far. Swanning off and abandoning it as someone elses problem to deal with will get peoples' backs up.

I will say about cinemas though... at my cinema the bins are about the same diameter as the larger popcorn and drinks buckets. There's no way you could get a screening's worth of debris into them. Staff armed with black bags airhostess style are ready to clean up at the end of the showing (I do carry mine out anyway, but I don't buy bucket portions)

I don't get it, during weaning its a bit messy but by 18 months surely they have the motor skills to eat less messily. Otherwise don't order them rice and grated cheese when out.
I have been appalled at state of tables when out

NurseryFightClub
I agree. I did baby led weaning, but in a restaurant or cafe I would give non messy food. They quickly learn not to throw food if they don't get it back and aren't given more. By 18 months, there wasn't much to clean up, just wipe hands and face really.

I waitressed as a young adult, and it gave me a real appreciation of how hard the job actually is. I think it shows a distinct lack of manners to leave the place looking like a tip. Yes, when you go out you don’t want to do everything you would at home, but I would always make sure the bulk of the mess was tidied. And to be honest my friends would too.

We ask our teens to get jobs, not because we can’t afford to support them, but because we feel that these life lessons are sadly missing in some people. Hope the festive season provides you with lots of lovely guests and big tips plus no ludicrous mess OP!

YABU to feel humiliated. They’re the ones who made themselves look bad. I’ve sat next to tables full of entitled mums groups like this who take over a giant table and spend very little between them and chat away whilst their kids yell and smear the snacks they’ve brought from home everywhere. Most of the time they get up and leave shit everywhere without even making a minor attempt to clean up becuase they’re to busy being yummy mummy’s and it’s beneath them.

I really look down on them and feel frustation on behalf of the waitress and for the pub/cafe who will have lost customers because it puts other people off going in to the place. One of our local pubs is nicknamed ‘the crèche’ to the point that I know people with well behaved kids who avoid going there.

I’m all for pubs being child friendly but think it’s now gone too far in some as some people treat everywhere like it’s softplay or McDonalds birthday party. I wish some landlords wouldn’t be so fearful of the inevitable Daily Mail sad face story or Twitter boycott, but they need to tell these types to control their kids/themselves or get out and bar them if they leave the place a wreck. Maybe other customers should start saying something too to shame these types in to having manners.

Yanbu op

Everyone should work in customer service at some point. I was a waitress for a few years and now always scrape and stack plates, put glasses together so they're easy to pick up and leave the table as easy to sort as possible

It drives dp mad!

YANBU. I have friends I no longer meet in public because of the mess they allow their toddlers to make. It is disrespectful and entitled, and it just makes me cringe.

Sorry those people have no manners OP. Try not to take it personally.