To think after trying it on with boyfriends brother,we are done?

[angelarr]

I'm massively ashamed.
Friday night I met my boyfriends family as they had a party and I made a total fool of myself.
I drank 1l of vodka,I tried to kiss my boyfriends brother,I fell down some stairs.
I told his sisters and gran (who is 82) they were "swear words"
I can't remember any of it.
They've told me I'm not welcome in their home again.
Can I redeem myself here?
Do you think boyfriend will dump me?

Like others, I think you need to seek help for your alcohol problem. You are 23 with your life ahead of you - don't let alcohol ruin it.

I'm sure PP have mentioned this before but drinking alcohol is a huge no no when taking anti-depressants... you seem to be unaware of this.
Talk to your doctor and ask why you shouldn't be drinking whilst taking them. Not just vodka, any alcohol.

With Anxiety I think you will spend any time with this man feeling worse and scared about what happened. Even if they say they forgive you, your brain won't until you get proper help.

Send him an apology and explain that due to personal problems you need some time to yourself. Get yourself sorted. Then go on the dating scene when you know a litre of vodka won't cause you problems.

'Vodka doesn't agree with me'
1L of any spirit is enough to floor most people. It's not the vodka. It's not the ADs. It's the sheer quantity. If you do that as more than an absolute one-off you should see your GP about your drinking patterns.

if drinking vodka makes you a nicer drunk your words id hate to see what the other drunk you is like beyond me why you need to get off your face you ruined a family occasion if i was your bf id be running away from you fast as i could

OP, just how ill were you after downing a litre of vodka? I would've thought you would be suffering from acute alcohol poisoning and even if you weren't hospitalised how did you feel yesterday?
You need to keep away from your boyfriend and his family and get help for your drinking.

Hey OP. Hope you are okay. You know what you did was of the chart embarrassing and unacceptable so no lecture from me. X

Op, you need to find ways to handle your anxiety. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, or TRA if you are traumatised.
Meditation is something you can do yourself with lots of free resources on the net, and it can help with anxiety.
Best of luck with it x

You know what? I reckon that if it was a bloke writing this, everyone would just shrug and say 'Boys will be boys'.
😂 is this your first time on MN? OPs are told to LTB if their male partner’s lazy eye looks in the direction of another woman.

Ooof, you have earned your dumping, I would apologise and move on and never drink again.

It’ll be ok OP. Yes this relationship is over but it wasn’t right anyway. You’ve had a big shock, you’re still hungover and it’ll take a while for the shame to leave. But it’ll be over soon and big lesson learnt.

It's screamingly clear youre issues way more than just anxiety op. No judgement from me, I've done some questionable things in my time when my ' black dog ' has been on my back. Hope you have people around you who can see there's way more to this and support you.

I'd leave if he doesn't break up with you just because this will always be in your mind and even if he can get past this you won't forget and will always be wondering if he/family are judging your past.

You need to stop drinking.

Your behaviour is not ok. Anxiety and/or alcohol are not excuses for what you did.

I've stopped telling people I have (diagnosed) anxiety disorder since it became everybodies get out of jail free card.

Yes, I think you can assumed you'll be dumped.
You need to rethink your relationship with certain types of alcohol and may be worth seeking help. I think you would be considered to have a 'drinking problem' rather than anything more serious at present but it is a slippery slope. I found vodka (and tequila) made me hyperactive and I ended up in all sorts of scrapes similar to your recent incident. I had to stop drinking for a year to break bad habits and even to today I don't touch either of those spirits.
Time to have a good talking to yourself. I sought help from the AA to help me through my drinking problems which sound similar to yours (anxious in public settings and used alcohol as a crutch).
Today, I do drink but much more controlled (but I have some rules I follow as the potential for abuse is still there). Took me a while to get to this stage.

And the 'drinking so and so makes me angry' thing is rubbish. Its all the same substance.

It may all contain alcohol but I certainly notice a difference with different drinks. I'm nearly 50 and had major problems all through my 20's until I stopped drinking for a couple of years.
I've had about 15 years of managing it quite well but I am very aware of what I can and can't drink.
The main part though was learning to socialise without alcohol.

Give the poor OP a break, she fucked up big time and knows it. We’ve all done stuff we aren’t proud of. OP end the relationship for your own sanity. You may be at rock bottom right now but the only way is up

Big difference between drinking a few alcoholic drinks to settle your nerves and drinking 1 litre of vodka!!

You know what? I reckon that if it was a bloke writing this, everyone would just shrug and say 'Boys will be boys'. A bollocking, but it would go no further.

I disagree. If a female poster wrote that she’d taken her boyfriend home to meet her parents and he drank the best part of a bottle of vodka, tried to snog her sister and called her sisters and gran filthy names I don’t think many people would be telling her to give him a second chance. Do you?

OP please take responsibility and try to learn from this.

Is Granny upset or is she a tough old girl who gave it back?

MN always jump to the “you have a drink problem!”

I actually don’t think you do. I know lots of people that drink to excess on the weekends and not in the week.

I can go out day drink for over 12 hours straight and then not drink again for months.

With the family it’s raw but give it time and they might give you another chance.

I would recommend that if you can’t handle your drink that you drink less.

You need to speak to your boyfriend and find out how he’s feeling.

You don't think drinking as a coping mechanism, downing so much alcohol that you become inappropriate, abusive, have no memory of events, and your drunk behaviour being a repeated concern that others have raised, constitutes a drink problem Callmedarcy?

I am a man, and in your boyfriend's position I would end the relationship. I'd hope a woman in the same situation would do the same, and to be blunt you need help for what seems a drink problem.

I've just looked it up and 25ml of vodka contains a unit of alcohol.
So a litre is 40 units.

To put that into context, that's the same volume of alcohol as in 20 pints of beer or 4 bottles of wine

I'll happily hold my hands up to the odd drunken binge at OP's age; but I never got remotely near this quantity of alcohol.

I agree with Callmedarcy. In fact, I can recall a few incidents I have witnessed similar to this and I came fairly close to something similar myself ( in the midst of a nervous breakdown)

It seems shocking but ime it does happen, particularly when people are under 30. OP MN isn’t really the best place for sympathetic advice like this because most posters are much older than you and drinking is hugely frowned upon generally here. But some of us do get it.

It will be over, I promise. In a few years you’ll look back and get a flash of shame, but nothing like the disabling fear you feel now x