CF tightarsedness

[BorisAndDoris]

Inspired by another thread, I'd love to hear your experiences of CFers being tight arses, never putting their greedy paws in their own pockets.

Mine was an ex when I was a youngster. Maybe 16? 17? I was financially independent (okay, skint on min wage but paid my way) and rented my own place.
CFBF and I were in the early stages of dating (maybe 1 or 2 months in).
I was running errands one day and needed to pick a few things up from the supermarket. He tagged along.

I went round the supermarket and he kept chucking items into the trolley. Fine with me, no point in 2 trolleys.
He put his stuff on the conveyor (sans divider!) whilst I was packing mine. I didn't notice until he said he needed to pop to the loo. He left me to pay for everything.! I was mortified and hadn't grown the lady balls yet to stand up for myself well. I paid and asked him for the money when he got back. He told me he forgot his wallet and would give it to me when he came next time. He didn't.

In fact the next time he showed up I was leaving for the cinema with my best friend. We told CFBF we already had plans. My Best friend was paying because it was his turn and I was skint (thanks to CFBF's shopping which he forgot to bring his money for again!)
I locked up the house and we all walked to the bus together. CFBF got on too as it was also his bus.

We got off in town. CFBF got off with us. Okaaaay...
We got to the cinema. CFBF still with us.
I asked if he was heading home and he said no, I'll come with you! Hmm.. whatever, I couldn't really stop him.

He walked in just ahead of us. The desk clerk had the tickets printed when we got there and best friend paid. It wasn't until we were at the concessions counter he realised he'd paid for three, not two. CFBF has asked for three tickets and not paid his one. It was so awkward that best friend couldn't bring himself to actually say anything.
I stopped answering the door to CFBF after that night and best friend and I have been laughing about him for 20 years now. I should have realised when he only turned up at mine in time for dinner and I'd feed him not wanting to be impolite!!

This has reminded me of the wife of dhs friend a proper CF. They came to stay for the weekend, I was on maternity leave so little money. We went to town and stopped to get a drink and lunch, in the queue she said how they were tight as saving for hours and wedding so I offered to buy lunch. Next shop we went into she bought a £100 radley handbag!! That evening we went with other friends for a curry, they were going to share a main and sides- and drink tap water, due to finances.'my husband offered to pay- they then ordered starters, mains and several sides plus drinks!

I've barely spoken to them since and would never host them again.

From when I was a waitress, people who’d hang back after a group meal and pocket the cash tip left on the table.

These people get away with it because people are too willing to be walked on. Rose, why don't you all pull him up on it? I wouldn't bother to meet him anymore ever, yes, even as a family member. My dad had a brother like this and I think I met the man about twice in his life because my dad just refused to enable him like that because it's a twat thing to do.

What does cf mean? Or stand for?

First bf -I had a part time job and he told me he lost his... so I paid for everything for about 3 months and was really skint.
Anyway one day looking over his shoulder at the cash point I noticed he had a grand in his account.. and so it transpired he had a secret job at a jewellery shop which he went to when I was working at my Saturday job 👌😂😂. When I questioned him he claimed it was all for my Christmas present ( that never transpired)
Dumped the weirdo soon after! 😂

CF = cheeky fucker

Ooh, I remembered one that was trying to be a CF to me! When my kids started school I owned a lovely horse who was coming to the end of her life. She was too old to do much more than walk when ridden but she still liked going for short, gentle rides or just walk out in-hand, to see the world go by. One of the mum's at school, on finding out I owned a horse, told another mum, "That's summer sorted, Krusty has a horse, we can all ride her," she meant her kids as well. Luckily the other mum pointed out that it didn't really work that way and the mare was not able to work hard anyway. It didn't stop this woman from turning up at the livery yard where I kept my horse when I was at work and demanding they tack her up and bring her to her as she fancied a ride in the countryside. When the staff explained they couldn't do that, she said, "Oh, it's fine, I know Krusty." So they called me and had the pleasure of hearing me yell at her over the phone. Didn't stop her asking me to give her kid free riding lessons though, as they were skint and I had a horse, so why wouldn't I share? Of course, no offer to pay half the mare's livery bill, farrier bill, vet bill, cost of tack or indeed, the insurance I would need to take out to cover her little treasure in case she had an accident on my mare. Not that any of those CFs would have got within six feet of my pride and joy. When I suggested that she look for a share in a younger horse for herself and her kids she said, "Oh no, horses are expensive!" Yeah, but it's ok to bum the cost of one of someone you only know to say hello to at the school gates?! She was also notorious for never wanting to pay for a drink when out with other parents or put her hand in her pocket for anything. She once gave a teacher some out of date apricots dipped in chocolate as an end of term gift. Luckily, she had been bragging about how cheap the gift was and why in the playground, so he was warned before he was tempted to eat them!

"D"M had a history of tighfistedness, despite being extremely wealthy and self-indulgent. She had 5 DGC, and was too mean to buy anything much for birthdays and Christmases. One year for Christmas,she gave my 6-yr old DD a cheap, violent pink dress, obviously far too small, saying "this probably won't fit you, but that's ok, I know of someone who can wear it." DD unwrapped it, then it was snapped out of her hands and rewrapped in the same paper and passed on to my cousin's 4-yr old DD. The perfect revolving present. She also bought my niece a dilapidated doll's pram from a charity shop, gave it to her for Christmas, saying "But it must stay here at my place for all the children to play with." What children?? She was the youngest by a long way. This was the woman who blew millions of inherited family money on personal extravagances.

Some of these CFuckery stories are jaw dropping but even more astounding is the way people let them get away with it. Even worse, let them get away with it time and time again.

My younger BIL is embarrassingly tight. Stayed with us on a few occasions, never pays for anything, expects to be driven around. I can get people being careful if they don’t have a lot but when you have a huge salary why be like that? He never pays his share of meals, drinks, just expects to be treated as though he is a child, he’s in his mid 50s. One example is last time he was here, I saw him looking at his phone, I said I don’t have that persons number, he said I’m just checking the number and I’ll use your house phone so it doesn’t cost me anything. I had to leave the room.

Years ago when I was around 21, I was with a guy who we'll call X. My parents asked me and X if we'd like to go to Camden with them for the day, X said he was really skint so my dad said he wouldn't mind paying for lunch and a few drinks.
While in Camden, X spots a pair of trousers he really liked, then decided he had to buy them, they cost £80!
I was embarrassed after my dad had said he'd pay for our day out (I did offer to pay min and X''s half but he said no).
A little while later we went to the pub for a quick drink before heading home, I said to X "as you obviously have got money, why don't you offer to buy a drink to say thanks for our day out?" Guess what he says!!! "I would but I can't afford it" 😮😮😮😮

My dad was fuming after that.

We still laugh about how X was always first in the pub but the last one to reach the bar.

Still makes me cringe 11 years on

When my DD was about 10 she was into sewing, one Christmas my cf very well off , sister gave her, the only niece, an interesting looking package. Inside was a bag of about 10 cheap and poor quality spools of thread. I looked carefully in the wrapping paper to make sure we had not overlooked something, but no, that was it. That Christmas , as a single parent , I had spent about £20 on each of her four children.

cfmagnet that is awful!

I've got enough CF tales from when I was working to fill a book. One example (CC = Cheeky Client):

CC: "How much do you charge for full leg?" Me: "£15" CC: Is that for one leg or two? Me: That's for a pair of legs. CC: "and?" Me: "that's it, £15 for full legs". CC: "I'm waiting for the magic word". Me: "um... Abracadabra?" CC: "discount. What discount do you offer?" Me: "I don't offer discount as my prices are very reasonable and much lower than you would pay in a salon" CC: "But if I went to a salon they would offer me a discount". Me: "well I suggest you do that then. Byeee!"

DDad and stepmum came to visit for five weeks, and wanted to travel around Europe. They didn’t want to go by themselves and decided that as I was self employed, wouldn’t it be great if I came too. They kept sending through their ‘wish list’, I booked it on my credit card with the promise my stepmum would transfer through money. They came, we all traveled, and I got about half of the cost for their expenses back - meaning I covered 60% of their trip. I felt uncomfortable asking Dad for the money so let it slide even though it meant I had to work two jobs for almost a year to cover it. They came a second time five years later, for six weeks. I emphasised that as we had just brought our home, I couldn’t afford an expensive trip. It became four weeks, and although I got about 70% of their costs, in Germany stepmum supposedly got pickpocketed on the train losing 4K in cash (yes, really - she had the withdrawal receipts). I ended up having to ‘lend’ (give) them 2.5k cash, which I never got back...

Six months later, DB casually drops into the conversation that DDad and stepmum had had an argument as DDad had seen the insurance renewal quite which had skyrocketed. Turns out she’d successfully claimed for the 4K on their house insurance. I almost choked, and let him know that they’d never repaid me for lending them money. DB replies “Oh, but they paid for your trips” I then discovered that Stepmum had told my siblings that she had covered all my travel costs for both extended trips around Europe. I emailed my DB the spreadsheets and my bank and credit card statements to prove I’d actually subsidised my DDad and stepmum to the tune of 11k including the ‘pickpocket’ money, and trips to places I’d already visited with friends and DH.

To add insult to injury, I then discovered that DDad had given my stepbrother 50k as a wedding gifts few weeks after returning home (the same as he’d given my siblings). Guess who never even got a wedding card even though we got married the same year - and no, they didn’t pay for the wedding as we eloped just like my stepbrother.

Stepmum suggested a few weeks ago that she and her best buddy would like to come visit Europe and base themselves at my home for a month. I’ve said our spare room is fully booked until 2045.

Oh and she’d also told DDad that she’d reimbursed me the 2.5k I’d lent them but pocketed it herself

@NotTheQueen

I'm sorry but why the hell havnt you just told your dad?

If you're not willing to stand up for yourself then it's your own fault it happened twice.

Colleague - cannot ever afford (unwilling) to contribute to gifts events etc. Never bakes when it’s her turn....just patronising comments ...oooh bluelegume you need to bake I don’t have time or money. Yet she mocks me for not using my hard earned money to look better....I don’t look awful btw I just don’t fake the whole lot. I also pay my way in life yet she pretends to be a single parent to claim whatever she is ‘entitled ‘ to but lives with the boyfriend of 2 of her children. She mocked me this week for making up a word.....the word was frivolous 🙄apparently I’m ‘wierd’.....new job beckons

Years ago I had a friend who wanted to run a 10k for charity, specifically for a children's ward in the specialist hospital my ds spent a fair amount of time on when was really young. I sponsored her £50 as the cause was so close to my heart. Plenty of other people were equally generous and she raised a fair amount.
All lovely you would think? Except she never got around to banking the cash and sending the cheque. I found out later when she drunkenly laughed about how the cash had paid for her Glastonbury tickets! She must have forgotten I'd sponsored her.
I got my money back and donated it directly but funnily enough she never spoke to me after that night and I bet the hospital never received the money.

I had a friend that used me to the max. We shared a horse yard that we built our stables on. We went halves on all the costs, I did the lion's share of the building work, she did poo picking for 4 days a week, I did 3 days (she owned 3 horse and I had 1). I used to pay for everything and she would pay me her half in dribs and drabs. We ended up buying a trailer so we could take the horses out and again, I paid for it and she was to pay her half when she could afford it. She was going hunting at least 3 times a month (costs £50 each time). 6 months later my DF died after a long battle with cancer and a few weeks later I had to have my horse PTS. I was devastated as you can imagine.
I went to use the trailer a couple of months later and discovered that she had locked the hitch so I couldn't use it. She said she was protecting her investment (she still owed me over £700 and had not paid a penny since 3 months before my DF died, I'd been too busy/upset to notice). I "borrowed" the trailer one day to help move another person's ponies and whilst driving, the ramp at the back dropped down and could have caused a major accident. This happened because she hadn't looked after it and a leak into the side of the trailer had caused the whole side to rot.
She basically told me she was washing her hands of it and because it happened when I was driving it was my problem.
I went to collect it as arranged as she didn't want it on "her" yard and I went early morning to avoid her because I was spewing I was so mad. She turned up as I was leaving and blocked the entrance to the field, setting her 2 big dogs on me. All to try and provoke a fight. Luckily my DH was with me and he dragged me away. Total bitch and I hope she gets what's coming to her.

My mil. If dh, dc and i went with her to eat out, she would treat any and all of her dc, dgc, and inlaws. Very nice.

However, if dh was not with us, I would be expected to pick up entire tab for his sister, mother and of course dc and myself. I was SAHM, so HE was paying, not me. But she hated me and couldn't bear to pay for my lunch.

Also, dh bf and wife when we were all newlyweds visiting their home city. We spent 2 nights at theirs and of course took them out to dinner. They chose. By the time we paid for drinks, starters, main, drinks, dessert, we could have stayed at 5 star hotel. AND she had a photo of my dh looking snuggly with HER prominently displayed. DH swore it was optical illusion.

He's your dad fgs! TELL HIM!

@ukulelelady Please PM who this is, or give a teeny clue. I don't work for the Daily Mail BTW!

What a massive CF though. Off the chart.

PS: My random guesses are Jamie Lawson or Tom O'Dell.

@ukulelelady I've another guess, Frank Turner.

Whenever we were arranging a works night out a group of us, who lived some distance away always travelled together. We usually took turns, my husband would drive one way, another friends partner the other way. One friend never took her turn as her partner was a taxi driver and was always busy. However one time when we couldn’t arrange transport back she said she would ask her partner to come get us. The rest of us said that’s great and how good it was of him. Everything was fine, my husband took the four if us in and friends partner picked us all up. As we were nearing home CF said that she had got a discount for us on the taxi as she was traveling with us and it would only cost £24 so asked the 3 of us for £8 each. CF expected us to pay the whole fare and as she had got discount she didn’t need to contribute. Was bad enough we were expected to pay, when my husband had taken her at least 6 times and about same for other mates, but another friend who had a taxi only charges £20 for the same journey.