To be really angry my DD took my coffee on a weekend away, without asking?

[AdoreTheBeach]

I’m an early riser. I have sleep issues (wake up and can’t get back to sleep), so I follow a fairly strict sleep hygiene routine. That includes no caffeine after 10am. I also have digestion issues and diverticulitis so I need to be “regular”, which routine includes my morning coffee. I look forward to my lovely huge mug of coffee every morning. This morning, it’s gone. Extra large jar of Dow Egbert coffee is gone. Hard to miss a jar that size. My DD left last night for a weekend away with friends, renting a large self-catering house. Dare I suspect she’s the culprit? If so, AIBU to me REALLY angry with her? (FYI, looked in bin and recycling just in case accidentally broken - not there).

That would piss me off.

Why didn't she just spoon a small amount into Tupperware?

I have a small 1 cup cafetière and a nice bag of coffee in the fridge and have two cups every morning - best part of the day! Much nicer than instant. Don’t be really angry with DD as you’ll end up feeling rubbish (I have a 17 year old) but just have a chat about it.

Go to the shop and get another jar? I’d be miffed but not angry. Tbh you couldn’t pay me to drink instant coffee anyway!

I guess some people get a kick out of taking the most literal interpretation possible, just for an excuse to disagree...

Yeah, I'd be very annoyed. Even if she didn't know why you need to have coffee every morning, she must know it's part of your morning routine, and anyone who's used to morning coffee will be understandably upset when it's suddenly missing (because someone took it without asking).

It was selfish of her to take the whole thing. She's not a 5-year-old who's still learning empathy and consideration; someone in her 20s should know better.

I would be very cross too

Meh, I actually like the taste of instant, but it's also a heck lot more effective when I need waking up. I also have a coffee press so there!

She only took it because she knew she'll be out of range when you'll realise . Even my 4 yo refuses to tolerate me without any coffee!

I would be really angry. Slightly miffed doesn’t cover it.

It’s yours, not hers, she should not have taken it. Very selfish. Bloody kids!

Keep a spare jar.

Very selfish and thoughtless of her. It may only be coffee, but it's YOUR coffee. She's certainly old enough to know better.

A jar of coffee for Christmas seems appropriate.

I wish I only had a coffee problem to post on mumsnet about.

I understand you being annoyed that you couldn’t have your coffee this morning, especially if it’s for health reasons. However I do think YABU to be so angry because of it. You can go get another jar to help out today and have a word with her when she comes back. Don’t ruin her holiday by contacting her while she’s away :) it’s not worth it!

You raised your daughter, so perhaps you should speak to her on why you don’t do these things? I certainly wouldn’t take the whole jar of something I know my family uses out of respect for everyone.

YANBU She had no right to help herself to the coffee that you bought, especially when there was no other coffee in the house. She wanted to make sure that she and her friends had coffee and didn’t care this meant you had to miss out. She is thoughtless and selfish.

I would be angry too - all she needed to do was ask beforehand and not just take ... take her phone when you go out for the day and see if she's just slightly miffed

Be careful what you wish for bevelino

She should have left a spoonful in your mug but it isn’t is only a jar of instant coffee. Your reaction and justification seems somewhat excessive. Most people over 50 have diverticulitis.
Had it been your nesspresso and a tin of pods, I could see you might give it more than a passing “oh dear” but a jar of ordinary instant coffee?

Seriously get a grip, OP. It's coffee, you're not going to die without it.

Tell her not to do it again and leave it at that. You sound like hard work.

Why should op need a spare jar just in case her selfish dd takes hers ??

This isn’t just about coffee. It’s about the bloody selfish entitlement of some young adults who think they can just help themselves to our stuff totally agree with this from Matilda!

*bevelino

I wish I only had a coffee problem to post on mumsnet about*

And the sanctimonious award goes to......

I become irrationally angry when my late teen / adult daughters pinch my stuff too. They finish my chocolate, 'borrow' my flip flops and don't return them, and the younger one keeps helping herself to my exercise leggings, so on the day I need them, I find them screwed up in her room. It's so bloody annoying! They don't do this to anyone else. They are kind and thoughtful to their friends. And it's not like I take it lying down ... there's world war 3 every time. They just weather it and then do it again. Infuriating.

Yes,,its just slightly annoying !!! Its best just to stock up on some more of your favourite coffee, and then if your daughter absent mindedly takes your coffee again,all will be ok...

I don't ever drink coffee these days, just lovely tea., but don't have anyone here to whip 50 tea bags out of the jar.!!

This is why I keep hidden enough coffee for a pot, enough chocolate for a treat, a little bit of sugar, and anything else I don't want eaten!

It's not that the culprits don't replace it, they do. It's just that they usually don't think to replace it until I need it and it's gone!!

I agree that it’s irritating, but to be really enraged is waaaay out of proportion. Getting so mad about a minor infraction isn’t going to help the blood pressure.

I'm very lucky because where I live there are shops that sell instant coffee,ground coffee and even fresh coffee! Go figure.

@JaneJeffer @bigchris, I appreciate the OP’s complaint. However, it hard to understand how anybody can get “REALLY angry” over a jar of coffee, no matter the circumstances. The OP needs to put things into perspective.