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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to not wear panty liners every day?

905 replies

Sammysees · 07/11/2018 14:21

Tbh this is a complete new one for me. Was having a conversation with a friend yesterday who wears panty liners every day and has done since she was 15. I’d never heard of this before and told her so. She told me I was a manky minge and that everybody wore them. Is this true? Thoughts please ....

OP posts:

Megan2018 · 08/11/2018 13:41

Every smear test I have had, the nurse has commented on the amount of mucus obstructing my cervix. Along with the usual indignity of it I have to perform a series of coughs to try and dislodge it!
Some nurses have said it is unusual, some haven’t commented.
I have had thrush before and can tell the difference. But my secretions have been tested at least 3 times over 20 years and every time confirmed as normal.

It has got worse since I came off the pill in my 30’s, but it has always been there since puberty-I’m now 40. A dry minge for the menopause will be a relief!

3littlerabbits · 08/11/2018 14:09

I do. Can’t run for a bus or after the kids otherwise.

Satsumaeater · 08/11/2018 14:29

*I save my raised eyebrows for women who choose to wear them as knicker protectors - and yes I do know some who do"

Erm...that's exactly why I wear them. Isn't that the point of panty liners? Just as the point of sanitary towels is also to protect underwear (and clothing generally and whatever you are sitting on).

What a strange discussion.

As for the notion liners are horrific for the environment...they're tiny! I wrap them in one sheet of loo roll and put in bin. Hardly the biggest eco-crime of the century.

OhGrrrreat · 08/11/2018 14:41

I've never felt the need to wear panty liners but seriously considering it. Recently I feel like I have way more discharge and (sorry tmi) seem whiffy towards the end of the day. I get a lot at night too for some reason. Not sure if it's normal (mid 30s).

SinisterBumFacedCat · 08/11/2018 14:43

News flash: discharge is normal

If you don't get much if any, fine. I'm incredibly jealous of you! I sincerely wish I didn't have as much as I do but I always have since puberty and I doubt it'll change any time soon. I probably wear two a day, rather than have an uncomfortable wet gusset and have to change my knickers several times a day. There is nothing bloody wrong with me though! The first page of this thread is people laughing and finger pointing at those of us who, shock horror, choose to wear pantyliners, which is pretty mean.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 08/11/2018 14:43

But why? As I said, my logic is based on knickers being protective, cheap and easily washed. Why would I wear protective gear to protect my protective gear?

Extra cost, extra pfaff, extra resources used. I have never understood why anyone would bother (unless there was a specific need), hence the raised eyebrow!

I have asked one of my friends who uses them and her answer is fairly nebulous: because it keeps her knockers clean, is cleaner, just is... So, in the absence of any reason to use them, I continue to wonder why bother?

SingaporeSlinky · 08/11/2018 14:48

If you’d read the thread, you wouldn’t need to ask why. Some of us have repeatedly explained exactly why. Did you miss the replies saying a gusset is simply not enough for some of us? A damp patch can get through to trousers and beyond. If you don’t need them, great, don’t use them. I need them.

PrincessDaff · 08/11/2018 14:50

I have had to wear them every day since getting the implant as I randomly have spotting, never enough for a tampon but enough to stain your knickers to the point were I can not wash it out as it is dark brown. I have had to throw at least 10 pairs of knickers away so I now wear them every day so save me from spending the day in blood stained knickers.

SinisterBumFacedCat · 08/11/2018 15:06

Curios I suspect your friend was being evasive because she didn't want to discuss her discharge with you, I wouldn't in RL. Can you blame her?

For some of us, one layer of gusset isn't enough protection for an hour or two let alone a day. Think yourself lucky it's not like that for you.

BettyBitchface · 08/11/2018 15:26

I do wear them. I sometimes piss myself a little if I cough or sneeze. I'm on tablets where a common side effect is a persistent dry cough, which is fun. If I have an actual cough or cold I have to switch up to Wilko own brand big incontinence pads but otherwise a pantliner will do the job.

I'd prefer no pads down there of any description though, I prefer an unfettered fanny.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 08/11/2018 15:30

I suspect your friend was being evasive because she didn't want to discuss her discharge with you, I wouldn't in RL. Can you blame her? Given the reason for the conversation, yes, I bloody well would blame her! That's a friendship I will have to reassess!

And those of your chastising me and telling me to read the thread - try reading my posts - I have repeatedly said that in the absence of a specific need

bellanotte22 · 08/11/2018 15:41

The post about it being like wearing wet socks is bang on.

I've had excess since I was a teen. My mother complained bitterly about my use of liners and thought it was an advertising fall. So she banned them. In the end my sore chafed skin gave her some clue that it wasn't a vanity issue.

It's really sad that there are women reading this thread who believe being a woman woman is rooted in female biological reality and yet they think this very real issue for many women is the product of Male marketing campaigns and wanting to smell like flowers. That reaction has really crushed me tbh, I'd have put money on those women being understanding.

Imissgmichael · 08/11/2018 15:42

Ex nurse, mainly gynae. My discharge is perfectly normal and I wear panty liners daily. I don’t like stains on my knickers that rarely completely wash out and I don’t like slightly moist knickers either. The panty liner soaks up the secretions and I always carry a spare one.

Oh and shock horror I shower every day and change my knickers daily.

SingaporeSlinky · 08/11/2018 15:43

Well of course if there’s no need, then you wouldn’t. That’s obvious surely? You wear them because you need to. Some of us have given graphic examples of why we do, and yet people are still commenting with silly replies. OP’s question was “does everyone wear them?” Clearly the answer is no, some do, some don’t. There are a few reasons to wear them and varying degrees of what feels uncomfortable to each person.

Hopefully some people have genuinely learnt something without the need to judge.

AsleepAllDay · 08/11/2018 15:44

No! They're full of fragrance and shit that I'm sure was contributing to UTIs. I just make sure to change underwear daily and wash well. Panty liners are a real waste until its to catch a light flow period

AsleepAllDay · 08/11/2018 15:45

Also I do get discharge/spotting but I just take it in my stride, I used to wear liners for that but plain cotton can do what they can just as well

CuriousaboutSamphire · 08/11/2018 15:53

Well of course if there’s no need, then you wouldn’t. That’s obvious surely? You wear them because you need to Well, that's why I posted that I reserve my raised eyebrow for those who do choose to wear them, without any need!

Which is why I am perplexed at still being moaned at and being told to RTFT or that a good friend lied to me out of embarrassment - we were talking about embarrassing things and swapping coping mechanisms, she is that friend in my life but, apparently I may not be that friend in hers!

Or some posters are too busy beg a tad defensive which s understandable given the thread topic!

SinisterBumFacedCat · 08/11/2018 15:57

*Today 15:44 AsleepAllDay

Ffs. There are unperfumed liners, like towels. But not all discharges can be cleaned away by washing, unless you plan on washing every hour.

TisMeTheLadFromTheBar · 08/11/2018 16:00

Only on MN would you find so much judgement over whether or not you wear panty liners. I never discuss stuff like this with anyone my friends.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 08/11/2018 16:02

I never discuss stuff like this with anyone my friends

Isn't that one of those things MN is for? All those conversations you don't feel comfortable with in RL!

M3lon · 08/11/2018 16:03

This thread is a proper disgrace. No one should be shaming anyone for either moistness or lack thereof.

But the absolute crowning low point for me was mrtrebus saying is was insulting to suggest someone might be incontinent. Fuck right off with that.

People are incontinent, often due to childbrith injuries. It is NOTHING TO BE ASHAMED OF, and cannot therefor be an insult.

PortiaCastis · 08/11/2018 16:30

You have vaginal secretions because otherwise you'd squeak when you walk!

Erm ok then ! and no you may be a nurse but you're wrong, an awful lot of women have excessive discharge and that is normal for them and they have already seen their GP.
Online medical diagnoses are dangerous !

Plessis · 08/11/2018 16:36

Sorry to bang on. Well, I'm not really sorry. But discharge that doesn't wash out?? and bleaches pants?? Really? And I mean really in a Well I never knew that way rather than a disbelieving way as I can see this is going to get heated

the only thing that doesn't wash out of my pants is blood occasionally. What would make a normal vaginal discharge bleach a pair of pants?

Plessis · 08/11/2018 16:37

incontinence is a compltely different issue. I was incontintnet for a bit after dc2 - a panty liner would have been the equivalent of a chocolate teapot - I needed a full on tena lady

SilentIsla · 08/11/2018 16:42

PortiaCastis

*You have vaginal secretions because otherwise you'd squeak when you walk!+

Erm ok then ! and no you may be a nurse but you're wrong, an awful lot of women have excessive discharge and that is normal for them and they have already seen their GP.
Online medical diagnoses are dangerous !

People have referred to having seen their GPs, having been tested and declared healthy etc. And yet, A N Other comes along online and tries to put everyone right.

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