AIBU to not wear panty liners every day?

[Sammysees]

Tbh this is a complete new one for me. Was having a conversation with a friend yesterday who wears panty liners every day and has done since she was 15. I’d never heard of this before and told her so. She told me I was a manky minge and that everybody wore them. Is this true? Thoughts please ....

I hardly ever wear knickers let alone panty liners. Everything is all very normal down there. Never had thrush. Never smell. Even when on period.

Yes, this thread reads like when people who barely have periods try to compare theirs with my blood floods.

@catsmother I agree with everything you've said throughout this thread.

Ha, I get the period thing too. When I bleed, I BLEED, which people don't seem to understand. About 8 weeks of heavy flow, two weeks of which I'm actually bedridden because of the pain and clots? Not a "usual" period. But normal for me.

Ha @Lweji - yes I keep telling my body to quit with the tsunami and listen to Mumsnet! 😂

This lack of awareness and belief in other people’s anatomy and experience is what does make girls and women ashamed of their bodies, thinking they are ‘wrong’, ‘different’ or ‘dirty’. The porn culture is bad enough without women adding to the problem themselves.

Very well said, I have to wear them and change them during the day, and yes I've been checked out by various GP's and it's not incontinence, nor and age thing, I just happen to have more watery discharge than most people.

PS - who ever said Dribbly Foof I love you a bit and I'm going to use this

Again why this insistence that it must be the perception of the poster at fault? FYI and I can't believe I am really sharing this - my pubic hair is au naturel. I wear cotton pants of normal width - can't stand thongs - I dislike tight jeans and tights, I never wear them. I'm not ashamed of my vagina and I don't think it's unclean. However I don't "think" I am soaking wet - I am sufficiently wet to want to change clothing. Whether it's soaking or not is of course subjective, certainly it's not like I've sat in a bucket, but it is certainly more than the extra 1-2 layers of cotton in a pant gusset would absorb. And anyway if I feel uncomfortable, perhaps to the point it is distracting and annoying me or irritating my skin, that is a personal preference. If I had this level of wetness on a jumper, perhaps due to resting my arm accidentally on a spill, I'd change that too. Wouldn't most people? As it's not practical nor particularly environmentally friendly () to change/wash knickers and potentially trousers several times a day I choose a more sensible option of pantyliners.

And no I don't want to sew my own pantyliners from an old t-shirt thank you very much, I will just continue to buy them. I don't go on and on and on about people using reusable pads or mooncups just because I prefer them if they prefer tampons or Always.

Do you ever step in a wet patch when wearing socks? Isn't that THE MOST irritating sensation? Imagine that on your foof.

Do you ever step in a wet patch when wearing socks? Isn't that THE MOST irritating sensation? Imagine that on your foof.

Oh god, it is exactly like that @bertiebotts ! With the added embarrassment of looking like I’ve wet myself!

Fair enough. Blame other women. Can't be anything to do with advertising or marketing. And fascinating that the women getting the blame here are the ones saying that not all women need to use a panty liner every single day. Not the ones saying that those who don't must be unclean and "manky".

Apart from the OP's friend who apparently called her 'manky' I haven't noticed anyone else using this term to describe women who don't use liners.

In fact, up thread, I think I mentioned I felt rather envious of those who don't have the need and wouldn't dream of questioning their preferences or making noises of disgust or disbelief like those which have been directed at women who do use liners from a minority of those who don't and seem to think they're superior because of it.

We are all different and have different needs. Why this simple fact can't be accepted god only knows.

I did not see anyone saying that those who don't wear them are unclean or manky.

People saying (and even a "nurse") that there must be an infection or a medical problem if you have "excess" discharge are fucking idiots. I've had a child and I've also been through fertility testing previously to that,I also went through PCOS testing when I was around 15. I'm pretty sure if it was an issue it would have been picked up. IT IS NORMAL AND NOT A MEDICAL ISSUE AT ALL surprisingly everyone is different SHOCK HORROR. for a "nurse" to come on and say she would test for infection if there was discharge is ridiculous and untrue.

Much as I don't use them and haven't ever considered using them (I save my raised eyebrows for women who choose to wear them as knicker protectors - and yes I do know some who do) even the NHS recommends them:

Panty liners can help with heavy or excessive discharge or if you're worried about any smell.

I've had to start using them because I got fed up leaving wet patches, both on clothes and furniture. And no, to the poster who said it must be sweat, it's not. You can see clearly when it's a sweat patch and when it is neatly vulva shaped (and in any case you're cold rather than sweating!).

To the landfill worriers, the constant overwashing of clothes some of us have to do would be part compensation, no? Not to mention that the waterfall of discharge does, over a short amount of time, both bleach the clothes and underwear and leave them kind of stiff and manky, meaning they need to be thrown out and replaced sooner than they otherwise would. Surely you'd also frown upon that kind of consumerism too?

There is nothing wrong with my vag. It's perfectly healthy, I have had it checked. This is just how my body works. I resisted liners for years, partly due to the fear of thrush - until I found the constant dampness actually gave me thrush and the liners helped to create a more healthy environment in my case.

I'm not pleased about my copious discharge - I hate liners and hate having to be conscious of the dampness, and I can do without extra shaming from the neat, dry, discharge-free, thanks. Furthermore my husband loves it - he thinks it means I'm constantly hot for him, that I only have to look at him and I get all wet. I haven't bothered to set him straight :D.

Nobody has said that

I'm taking offence to those saying anyone who does feel they need one is mistaken or has some kind of infection. I don't think it's unclean not to wear one if you don't feel the need. Why would it be?

In hot climates, it's normal practice for women to change their underwear at least once during the day. I know many who wouldn't leave the house without a spare pair in their bag.

It's not a huge deal to wash 14 pairs at the end of the week instead of 7. They don't take up that much space in the washing machine.

Ahh, I just need to tell my vagina that it’s soaking through my clothes due to overzealous sanitary protection marketing!!

When panty liners started being sold was a godsend for something I had feld the need for. No need for marketing as such.

Same thing for sanitary towels with wings.

Of fgs, this thread is infuriating. I’m only still responding because if it helps someone understand that they’re not the only one that has discharge or a need to wear a liner, then I’ve maybe helped.

Fresta there’s a big difference between “a small wet patch” which your DH could interpret as him turning you on right before sex, and a completely stained, unsightly, white streaky gusset. If I have some heavy discharge during my commute to work in the morning, trust me, by 11pm that will not still look like a small wet patch.

PerverseConverse why is my “perception of normal” skewed? If I’ve been told it’s normal and I believe it is, then the products aren’t unnecessary, they are in fact necessary. Periods are normal, sanitary products are necessary. Same thing.

1. Believe me, I wouldn’t be buying something if I felt I didn’t need it.

1. That doesn’t mean I think I smell, I know I don’t, and I’ve never smelt an odour from any other women. It’s purely to catch the discharge and dispose of it without needing to change knickers and keep multiple pairs of used ones in my bag all day.

1. I know there’s a difference between incontinence and discharge, thank you. I happen to have both, sometimes, but as I’ve said, mild stress incontinence, like an occasional issue when sneezing, coughing etc doesn’t warrant me constantly wearing incontinence pads. A liner is sufficient to cover me for both.

1. I never said I’m abnormal or dirty, how ridiculous. In fact I’ve clearly said the opposite, this is normal for me, and many others. I feel more hygienic disposing of a liner when needed, rather than having wet patches. Clearly some of you have never seen what I’m referring to (and why would you need or want to) and I really shouldn’t have to spell it out any clearer.

Good for those that don’t need them or want to use them. I need them and am happy to carry on if I need them.

I wear a full on sanitary towel every day due to severe OCD about germs and a constant fear of bladder leakage (i do get recurrent UTI's and have an over active bladder/urge to go with little warning)
A panty liner would be too small to get in the right place and allow for underwear moving and isn't absorbent enough.
Even if i didn't have the OCD though i would need the liner as i do have quite a large ammount of natural discharge and it has alwaays bleached/stained my underwear from a young teen when i didn't.

I don't live in a hot climate and changing pants is much more difficult when you're wearing boots and trousers than it is when wearing flip flops and a sundress.

Everyone knows their own body (or should) and what it needs. The op's alleged friend calling her "manly" sounds like a silly spoiled brat who should mind her own business.

Manky even!

Well it's why they're manufactured 🙄

PerverseConverse I didn’t say you aren’t a nurse, I just said you might be, might not. You could literally be anyone, and I don’t think people should take medical advice from a stranger on the Internet. I’ve already told you I’ve had checks, but the nurse had to take my word for it, I’m not going to show them a pair of stained knickers. And as a PP said, right before a smear test I have a shower, put clean underwear on and then fold them up out of sight during the test. All tests have been completely normal and I don’t need a hygiene lesson either. So you might have screened hundreds of women, but that doesn’t mean a lot of them haven’t had a normal, but heavy secretion. They just haven’t shown you. If there’s no sign of infection, why carry on with more swabs? And I repeat, I don’t believe “discharge is seen as dirty”, but until you’ve experienced it, what you believe is nothing more than a tiny drop of watery stuff in the gusset might be completely different to what I actually experience. Not my perception, the actual fact. Mid cycle I can have actual blobs of jelly consistency on the liner, not smelly cottage cheese infection stuff, but clear healthy secretions. When I wipe myself I can have long clear stringy bits. Can you tell me that’s not normal, if my GP has said it is? Would you prefer all the ladies coming to you for smears actually showed you theirs to prove it?