AIBU to be sick of privileged, older white men - join my tiny rant!

[windygallows]

Yup I'm probably unreasonable but I just want to put out there how sick I am of working with privileged, older white men - 40 plus and often 'posh'.

They dominate the upper echelons of the organization I work in as well as all the organizations I liaise with. Some are very good but many aren't due their seniority nor are they that smart - but they are well spoken and confident so whatever they say comes across as read. Their smuggery is driven by their high self regard and knowledge that they are 'where they belong'.

And despite their seniority they are often mollycoddled and supported by (usually female) PAs and completely enabled by wives at home who have been supporting them for 20+ years to the point that they take all the support for granted. They are so enabled that all they have to do is go to work and everything else is sorted for them - it's kind of a carefree oblivion they hold and thus they are completely oblivious to the challenges that others (e.g. women) face in their day to day lives.

I see this male privilege everywhere and everyday. In my boss who is completely self absorbed and with a family set up that enables and supports the fact that he is Number one. In other work scenarios, like when I was interviewed last week by a panel of important men + one woman from HR brought in to balance out the panel. I see 'important white men' driving fast in their cars, beeping up behind me in the fast lane as they need to go to their important meeting. Male privilege is everywhere and am sick of it.

From age 50 (my age) the number of women in the workforce starts to drop significantly and I'm wondering if it's because they're just sick of working with the men I describe!

I can't be the only person to feel this way. Please join me in this tiny rant!

You are not racist. Of that I am certain!

You’re clueless. Truly. It’s embarrassing.

Racism is rooted in systematic oppression and persecution of people for the colour of their skin. White people haveneverfaced this, and probably never will.

So the Irish have never exoerienced racism no? Or Jews no?

Dictionary deinition of racism is...

prejudice, discrimination, or antagonism directed against someone of a different race based on the belief that one's own race is superior.

HTH

Galatea, as the OP can I ask you to stop detailing this thread. You've had your say. Most on here disagree with you and you're not going to change their minds. Make it end.

You can't dictate what people post.

Still pissing myself at the thought that white European Jews experienced zero racism in Nazi Germany. Literally impossible for that to have happened, apparently. An utterly refreshing take on the holocaust, you have to admit. Bravo.

@Dontfeellikeaskeleton I’ve a female friend who is Canadian but lives in London. She also says that the UK is far worse than Canada for blatant sexism and the the sort of sexism you’re talking about which is harder to see. Do you have any idea what we could do to change things?

Canadian friend and I have to decide if we should send our dds to ingle sex secondary schools. Could that be one answer?

Until we can get the Golden Bear of Pom, maybe we could shrinkydink an empty packet and superglue a pin on the back.

Just googled architecture stats as I’m pretty sure having a vagina doesn’t actually mean you can’t plan buildings as well as penis havers. Seems it’s about 50/50 coming out of universities now though of course there’s a gender pay gap.
So the fact that men made buildings before isn’t to do with biology.

I'm not bothered, happy to leave people to their small mindedness.

As a senior manger in a fairly big company - 90% of my peers and superiors are white middle class, middle aged males. There's been more than one raised eyebrow because I arrive at 7.55am and leave at 5.02pm for my 8-5 shift. Not once has my boss ever spoken to me about not achieving what he wants me to do. I do more than I need to. Yet it's amazing how many of them stay in office until 6 or 7.

Karrwomannghia indeed, as I say it is changing and I did not say women could not just that they have not.

@SillySallySingsSongs
She asked her to stop. That’s a request.
She didn’t dictate that she had to stop.

Love this T shirt

Although having a vagina means I can clean better than people with a penis. I think the male genitalia must get in the way of the mop.

And this

@Holdinonbarely
MAJORTY [sic] of men in power are white Anglo Saxons.

But the majority of the population of Britain is white Anglo Saxon. So why is it even noteworthy that the majority in power are white, when this is simply representative of the demography of the country?

The noteworthy point is that they are mostly male, when half the population is female. No need for the OP to bring race into it.

Totally agree.

In my profession, at training level 80pc are women. At a senior level, it has always been around 20pc women. This is changing though - thankfully. But traditionally in my industry it’s been the older white men ruling the roost, propped up by underpaid women employees.

Galatea but you seem to be saying we should be grateful for the fact that men did the building, but why would we be grateful for not being educated or let out of the house or listened to even? Because that’s why it didn’t happen before. We’ve been held back since forever and it’s infuriating.

@CalamityJane10
Is that the best you can come up with.
It does matter that they are white. Because it automatically delineates that they are in the majority. although we are mainly women talking about the affect on us, the wider affect of the being white is an issue regarding entitlement. But that’s not the main point of the op.

I can’t really get where your stance lies, other than to argue for the sake of it.

It is true that at the moment women enable it...by being the support, dealing with the home, organising it so Mr Highfly, can do it, but it does often come at a cost, Mr Highfly will often be missing out on the family life he is providing for. IMO the men who do value the 'work/life balance' are not the ones at the top.
How many women would be happy to have the roles reversed and if they are lucky pop into the kids bedrooms to say goodnight to a child, leaving home before the child gets up and not having got home until after bedtime.

We cant change the past but need to look at how it can be made to work for the future..the options at the present time will not change things and I'm not sure what the answer is.

At the grassroots level as a manager at a fairly low level it is mothers who are now calling shots...rotas are round them, their colleagues get the shitty shifts around one or two individuals who demand family friendly rotas. Holidays around their requirements, colleagues have to plan theirs around these not if it actually suits them. Companies are falling over backwards to accommodate them so they don't fall foul and get negative publicity.

These women are resented then. Businesses are there to make money, not be social engineers. Those few if there are any men at the top who do school runs/pick up kids/take the dog to the vets yadda yadda are those who need to be shouting it out and be the role models for their male colleagues.

I like those Lulu, I could pin my GoldenPom to the T-shirt.

As a non white female in a corporate environment I can confirm that this OPs statement, to me, is utterly valid. All positions of power are given to white middle class men. Never to women, asians, black people. You can try and argue for 20 years or so that it's just chance that NONE of these people have the experience, skill set, fortitude, ambition or resilience...and then it just becomes fundamentally obvious that these people aren't allowed in. Stop knocking at the door and stop whingeing, nothing will change.

Karrwomannghia

Well they did a little more than just the actual building of course, they worked out all the science and maths as well. Women of today are standing on their shoulders to paraphrase Isaac Newton, so yes they should be grateful to an extent.

We should start to see large numbers of female innovators and inventors entrepreneurs, and if not it'll still be men's fault. It's a comforting world view.

Yes I agree. This is my experience in local authority. Mediocre white man doesn’t deliver anything or make any tough decisions but keeps escalating to the top. Females and BME who have far better ideas and drive don’t fit the mould.

I see this an awful lot in my organisation. Not all bad but there are certainly mediocre middle aged, white men in positions that a female would have to work so bloomin' hard and really prove herself to attain.

I once commented on his privilege to a man (outside work) and he got very angry and totally denied he had had any 'natural' benefit.

But women could have done maths and science back then just as well had they been given an education but they weren’t allowed! Need I remind you that women could not even vote? That until the 70s women could not open a bank account without a male relative’s signature?
So no, not grateful for my male ancestors oppression of my female ancestors. Because under the feet of those giants are women.

@GalateaDunkel
Oh just bore off. If you don’t have the wit or intelligence to see a wider view of human evolution