To want my DH to come home after my car crash?

[pinkcardi]

I had a car crash today, driver ran into me whilst I was waiting to turn right off the main road. Everyone ok, but shaken. Two small DC in the car. Other car a write off, ours badly damaged.

This happened 7.30am, DH was just arriving at work in local big city.

I dealt with it all, police, insurance, car garage, replacement car. Got amazing MIL to pick us up, she stayed a few hours after too which was a real help. Made tea etc.

My DH obviously concerned, on the phone etc, but hasn't come home. I asked at 11ish and he said he would stay for an internal meeting then come home, so he'll prob be back by 5.

I wondered if yours would have come straight home? My head and neck hurt, I want to sleep, I have two slightly upset children. AIBU just to secretly want him here?

My sis was in a very similar car crash yesterday, someone drove straight into the side of her, DD in the car, car badly damaged.

After sorting out the insurance she went home to get another car and then drove up to London, as it was our father’s birthday lunch and she had the lobsters (main course).

I gave her some rescue remedy and some alcohol, she was fine.

Mine would without me having to ask. His work also wouldn’t mind and probably would tell him to go home to be with us.

Yes of course he would,he wouldn't be able to concentrate at work.

You should really go and get yourself checked out at the hospital OP,having neck and head pain after a car accident should never be ignored.

I wouldn't even think to ask my DH to come home and I doubt he would either.

Glad everyone is ok though.

Have some arnica for shock, or sweet tea. Ibroprufen for the pain.
Any sign of concussion ring gp, if pain becomes whiplash and lasts more than few days, claim on insurance, there may provide physio.
You will be fine, too many forms to fill in tho

poor you, hopefully you are better soon.
my dh would have come home if I were too affected to look after dc, but not otherwise.

go book yourself a check up & physio to minimise whiplash (ask insurance)

your mil sounds like a star!

I often wonder if I'm in a parallel universe to most people on MN.
Yes, my DH would have come home straight away to check all was ok.
Likewise when he had a crash a year or so ago, I left work to check he was ok (very shaken up) and then I went back to work again.
I'm beginning to think I'm really odd on here .......... 

He would if I asked, but I wouldn't ask for that since no one was injured.

He probably would ask me if I wanted him to pick up dinner though.

It depends...
I had that and was in shock for the next few hours (2 of which were spent waiting for the car to be towed - on the side of a motorway).
If I had been closer to home, I would have appreciated some support because I was really out of it. Not injured as such and nor were the dcs but i certainly couldn’t think clearly....

I was involved in another accident where I came out wo any ‘side effects’ and was fine dealing with all this on my own.

Fwiw if your u have some neck pain, please mention it to the insurance and organise to go and see a physio in the next few days. If you’ve had some wishplash (very likely) it needs to be treated ASAP so you have as little répercutions as possible.

PinkCardi you might need to get yourself checked out as you're suffering from head and neck pain.

If I told my DH I had been in an accident he'd be in the car before I would have to ask.

I hope you're feeling better soon u

Btw I thinkthe people who say it wouod never have crossed their mind have never been really shaken by a car accident.
Whine you are in shock/shaken, you can’t think straight. You might not be physically injured but it doenst mes;year u are well either iyswim.

Yeah, he’d be there. It wouldn’t be too difficult to swing and I’d want him there. Plus it would mean a lot to the kids.

My DH definitely would have come home, especially if DC were in car with me, even if I told him not to bother.
True he might practically not be able to do anything but he would be able to make me feel a bit less shaken.

My head and neck hurt, I want to sleep

Ring 111, you may have whiplash or something else and need to be seen by medics.

It's horrible when you're involved in a car crash, however minor, and it does shake you up for the rest of the day.
You handled it all well but I think YABU to expect your DH to come rushing home. He knew you were all ok and safely at home.

MyBrexit I have been in a quite bad accident actually, and was shaken up. My car was written off. DH couldn’t come home from work 🤷‍♀️ . He is the boss but that means if he leaves there is a lot that can’t just be done by anyone else.
He also wasn’t able to leave work on two separate occasions when I have been sat in A&E on my own with all 3 dc. Both times one of them was injured but not life threatening or anything. It’s shit but he can’t leave work and I’m an adult so I just get on with it.

I must be amazingly out of touch, but yes I would expect DH to be here if I'd been in any kind of accident like that, let alone the kids. Work is just work, your family is important! Plus I'd want another adult around to keep an eye on us all in case of delayed reactions or injuries. To me, YANBU.

My DH would come home regardless whether I asked him or not, he works about an hour & 20 mins away and can come and go as he pleases, he can wfh too so has a few options.

I've seen your update and see you didn't know what to expect.
I wouldn't expect anyone to come home in this situation. No one was hurt, shook up yes but otherwise fine. Your MIL has helped out and the car issues are being dealt with. There is no need for DH to come home.
However you may feel worse tomorrow if you are a little bruised ( without reallisng it now) so maybe DH could be around at least in the morning to see how everyone is.

Not sure why some posters are saying OP isn't injured. She has head and neck pain and after a car accident that is potentially serious.

If my DBoyfriend had been in an accident like that I'd do all I could to get back to him.

My DH is definitely not good at expressing his love or being particularly empathetic but I'm pretty sure he'd come home just to see the kids in that situation.

If it was just me in an accident without any injuries he'd stay at work and send me a couple of extra texts/calls asking how I was.

Have you been checked over?

Forgot to say mine probably would but he’s in a job that he can leave if needed.

He prob thought all was ok and you were in safe hands with MIL. I would deffo get yourself checked out though. Bless you.

Yes he absolutely would and I would too. I’m a bit shocked at all these people evidently married to their jobs. Just weird.