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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Poolside etiquette

176 replies

PollyProsecco · 29/10/2018 07:31

On holiday, family near us being overly possessive with their inflatables. Our children have been told not to touch them by us, but being kids, they are obviously tempted to play with them. Especially when they are floating on the pool with no one else playing with them. Adults of family keep giving each other cross looks and now the inflatables have been placed far away from anyone’s reach. I just think this behaviour is odd - if it were the other way round, I’d happily let other children play with our stuff.
Interestingly, their children are quite happy to share their things and play with our children.
The situation now just creates an awkward atmosphere poolside. Who is being U?

OP posts:

BumsexAtTheBingo · 29/10/2018 10:28

I see the op has finally bought some inflatables. Once she’s had to buy a few more because kids have nicked or burst them I’m sure she’ll still be delighted to share with people who don’t want to pay for any.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 29/10/2018 10:45

Some of you on this thread are serious joy suckers

Innit.

Can just imagine them on holiday clutching their rubber dolphin to their chests whispering mine under their breaths.

sunglasses123 · 29/10/2018 10:50

I agree that these inflatables take up a fair amount of room. However many years ago I told a family that they could use our inflatable rubber ring in the shape of a duck in a public UK pool as we were just going to have showers. When I came back the scum bags had pinched it. It was an unusual one as well...

sunglasses123 · 29/10/2018 10:51

We always buy a couple of inflatables when we arrive at the resort. Why didn't you I wonder?

GreenDinosaur · 29/10/2018 10:52

@Lovemusic33, that sounds awesome, lucky you!!

Lovemusic33 · 29/10/2018 11:03

I remember any parents buying us I flatables and buckets and spades when visiting Jamaica. We met a Jamaican family whist there who were really poor (they had 17 children), we left them all our inflatables, buckets and spades and any money we had left over (mostly change) when we left.
Inflatables are not expensive, I bought some in lidls this year for a few £.

ittakes2 · 29/10/2018 11:33

We are lucky enough to holiday a lot and have only once come across children who think its OK to just take other people's inflatables. And those children did end up taking our inflatables out of the pool and leaving them elsewhere so it was not a good experience. Its obvious if a child comes close to my children playing that they want to join in or use the inflatables - so we always invite them to join in or say they are welcome to borrow them. But just because you are on holiday does not mean its OK to through basic manners out the window.

scarbados · 29/10/2018 11:40

@Hippywannabe Take them into the sea.

Unless you're prepared to be within arms length at all times, or even better, have a light rope attached to the inflatable and keep hold of it, please don't use inflatables in the sea. Ever.

Even in what looks like a calm sea, children get swept out on inflatables and can drown. Unless you can identify a rip current and keep your child out of it, they could be pulled out hundreds of yards within seconds. Our local lifeboat rescued 3 kids under the age of 8 who'd been swept out 4 miles in a small dinghy last summer while their parents were asleep on the beach.

Keep the inflatables in the pool and keep your children safe.

Spiderdemon · 29/10/2018 11:44

er I have children so can't go to a lovely adult lane swimming spa... but I do like to swim lengths. It's my holiday too.

however I'd usually go in first thing or some other time before the kids get in there.

EmpressJewel · 29/10/2018 11:53

I dont let anyone use our stuff when we are out and about. I have done in the past and our stuff has been broken.

MsTSwift · 29/10/2018 11:54

Remember on a family holiday a funny German family with a bearded dad and 3 identical lads walked over to our prized rubber dingy picked it up along with the paddles and purposefully strode off to the lake. Never seen my dad move so fast he loved that dingy we had driven it all the way to lake Garda and used it every holiday. They thought it was communal but we politely but firmly set them straight. Was so outrageous was funny moment

finallyme2018 · 29/10/2018 11:55

See normally if it was just me then I'd have no problem sharing the inflatables but my little boy has autism and whilst he's happy to share whilst playing with children. If he gets out then the inflatables have to get out to, he can't cope with people using them when he not around so I've had the funny looks when I've had to move his inflatables and say sorry but can I have it back. Keeping my child calm and happy is my priority whilst on holiday so whilst I understand how it looks and will gladly explain if asked. It's not necessarily as black and white as it can seem.

SushiMonster · 29/10/2018 12:07

I don’t share my lilo, it comes out of the pool and under my lounger when I’m not using it.

If you want an inflatable, buy your own. They are pretty cheap but also quite delicate. I don’t want anyone else breaking mine, or using it when I want to!

SixFeetUnder · 29/10/2018 12:10

We're just back from holiday and the pool at our resort had set times that inflatables were allowed in the pool and the rules were enforced by the lifeguard which I thought was a great idea. However every day without fail, as soon as the inflatable hour started the pool would fill up with people wanting to swim lengths who would then get all huffy about crocs, sharks and rubber rings being in their way. Despite the pool being empty beforehand.

Micke · 29/10/2018 12:21

Some people do want to actually swim in the, er, swimming pool which they've paid to use hmm

errr... the kids and families have also paid to use the pool, perhaps they want to be able to splash about without adult swimmers booking an entire section of the pool so they can swim up and down making tidal waves (note that my opinion is that there should be a way for everyone to be happy - both the swimmers and the kids on inflatables.

I dunno - everywhere I've been there's been a few outdoor pools - some allow inflatables, and some are for the more serious swimmer, then there's often the indoor spa pool which kids aren't allowed in at all (or only during certain hours).

My kids love the jacuzzis - luckily again where we've been there's been multiple so adults can stew in one, and the kids can play the 'blow up your rash vest so you look like an american football player' game.

BumsexAtTheBingo · 29/10/2018 12:23

Interested to know how old the ops kids are and whether they have any additional needs? Surely once the op had told them to leave the other people’s stuff alone that should have been an end of it? She shouldn’t have had to be telling them all morning! Whether the op thinks they SHOULD share or not they didn’t want to and her kids repeatedly went and took others stuff. Why didn’t you make them sit with you or leave if they wouldn’t stop helping themselves? It doesn’t seem like you ha e any control of their behaviour. It doesn’t matter how great and tempting the inflatables looked they didn’t have permission to use them!
You and your kids were being a pita and you have no high ground to be complaining about anyone else imo.

HoustonBess · 29/10/2018 12:53

They can't expect to leave inflatables floating about in a pool full of kids and not get played with. Taking them out of the way is a solution.

BumsexAtTheBingo · 29/10/2018 12:58

Well the op complained when they were left in the pool and when they were put out of the way!
I think it’s perfectly reasonable to expect a child not to use something that isn’t theres when they’ve been told no.

Dollymixture22 · 29/10/2018 13:04

I know the OP has left, but her poor kids. The looks were probably being exchanged about the cheap parents who wouldn’t buy their kids pool toys when the kids clearly wanted them!

Glad she shelled out and treated the kids

HugoBearsMummy · 29/10/2018 13:43

Unreasonable. The amount of issues I have had with parents doing nothing when my toddler has been playing with beach toys and some other random child picks up his stuff and walks off with it/starts using it. Don't think a child should be EXPECTED to share with people they don't even know. Same goes for reverse, if DS tries to touch someone else's toy I immediately tell him to give it back, sometimes parent will say it's ok for him to use but I totally would not be offended if they weren't okay with it.
You knew you were going on holiday- provide toys for your kids. Simple.

tiredgirly · 29/10/2018 13:45

Do not let kids take inflatables in the sea.sheesh,some real idiots on here!

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 29/10/2018 14:08

The other children weren't playing with them though all of the time which is why the OP asked if she was U in thinking the parents could have let them.

If your dc aren't in the pool but the inflatables are I can't think why anyone would pull their face at children wanting to play with them. As long as they were behaving themselves and looking after the floats what's the harm? Really.

YourMilkshakeIsBetterThanMine · 29/10/2018 14:10

Bit odd that your DC are old enough to play in the pool without you but not old enough to understand "don't touch those".

PunkrockerGirl59 · 29/10/2018 14:21

at the thought of all these adult swimmers rampaging up and down the pool making not just waves, but tidal waves no less!
People using the swimming pool for actual swimming will be accused of causing a veritable tsunami next ffs.

I did say in my previous post that pool should be fun for everyone, of course it should. But don't make ridiculous exaggerations to try and score a point.

And as for the idiots suggesting letting children take inflatables into the sea, there are no words....

Havaina · 29/10/2018 14:38

Reminds me of the Turkish baby swept to sea in an inflatable

m.youtube.com/watch?v=-T_oehV230s

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