to think these two girls are being neglected. And what do I do?

[Whysoslow]

Two young girls 8 and 5. Live at home with mum and stay with dad for two days a week. Mum lives a very chaotic life which means the girls regularly go to bed late and unwashed. If they get head lice they are not treated as mum thinks the treatments are too harsh and bad for their skin. House is a tip and dirty (cat faeces on floor) The girls don’t have appropriate clothes and shoes for the seasons (walking around in leather boots in boiling weather in the summer due to not having sandals/flip flops, no winter coats etc) clothes are dirty and not changed; they sometimes go to bed in their dirty clothes as she can’t be bothered to wash them or it’s simply too late) The list is endless. The mum just has completely the wrong priorities and to top it all she is going away for a weekend for a friends birthday and will miss her 8 year olds birthday.

All of the above is not due to a lack of money or education.

I feel so sorry for these girls.

I’m a bit by this post. You know all of this for sure, you presumably know how to contact SS and are capable of googling telephone numbers etc... so what are you asking MN? Surely you can’t be sat there having no idea what to do?!

The school may have neglect of these girls on their radar too, so may be worth the Dad sounding them out too as they'll probably speak to him about any concerns.

Contact social services. What is the father doing to rectify this?

And yes if all this is accurate, report.

Some of the things in isolation wouldn't be eg the wearing of boots could be a choice but I think it gives an overall picture of neglect.

I also wonder if you're the paternal grandmother? What is their dad doing to safeguard them? Has he discussed it with social services? Would he be prepared to be the resident parent?

This is definitely a safeguarding issue with both neglect of needs and possibly emotional neglect.

Report to Social Services or the NSPCC.

If you have first hand knowledge of this - if YOU have seen it with your own eyes, or the kids have told you then report it to SS.

If this is second hand knowledge then keep it to yourself. If possible encourage the person with first hand knowledge to report.

Hmmmmm sounds like a bit of rumourmongering to me. Sour grapes by someone who wants to discredit mum maybe? A lot of children choose inappropriate footwear - eg boots in summer - because they want to, not because there is no choice.
Yes report, and let someone who has all the facts decide what is really going on.

Both parents are neglecting the children. They both need to be reported.

Why isn't their dad buying them suitable clothes? Or treating their hair/skin? He is their parent too, after all.

I reported someone in my family under similar circumstances, down to the animal faeces and unwashed clothes. Social Services have been involved ever since and although the situation improved slightly it hasn’t completely improved to what are considered normal standards and the family do the bare minimum —despite help being thrown at them— to keep SS just about satisfied.

possibly emotional neglect

What’s the emotional neglect in the post? I can see lots of physical problems but going away for a birthday isn’t emotional neglect.

This is just a snippet of info. It depends if this happens lots and lots with parents missing huge moments for going out. If it’s just the once missing a birthday for an important event that’s understandable. It all depends on how often it happens.

Id still like to know how this person knows so much what relation is she and how much is guess work

the OP has not said that anything she says is guess work. It doesn't matter how OP knows or how she fits in if he/she is going to report anonymously.
I'd report to the school and ss, tbh.

Head lice - I don't get the impression that the headlice aren't got rid off just that the treatments you can get aren't used so possibly she does regular combing - not neglect

Wearing boots in summer is not necessarily neglect

Untidy house - that's often a judgement call and your standards may be excessive

Again one or 2 of the others could be judgement calls. It depends so much on how often and how excessively.

If things are how you've expressed them then you can be positive the school are already aware

Id still like to know how this person knows so much what relation is she and how much is guess work

Why?

My dd used to wear boots in the summer through choice. Not being there for a birthday sounds to be part of a pattern of not putting the children first. The rest sounds neglectful.

Are you going to contact ss?

Please report. Children in this situation don’t have a voice and you need to speak up for their sakes.

Phone social services and put in a cause for concern. It doesn’t matter how you know- you have a concern, that is enough. It isn’t your job to investigate.

Do you know which school the children go to? Could you raise your concerns there; likely they're already on someone's radar.

On the other hand if they've told you, they're likely hoping you're the adult that will help them.

The wearing of unusual clothes may be SEN issues where they like wearing comfy familiar clothing.

mummyoflittledragon you are spot on. Missing the birthday is part of a massive patterrn of the neglect.

As I’ve said before this is about two little girls who deserve to be washed, clothed and put first before anything or anyone else.

The dad, from what I gather, likes being a part time dad and lives a very nice life aside from his two daughters.

I needed to hear opinions first but all of the replies have cemented my gut feeling of what to do.