Hauled into school because dd had no breakfast

[takeastand]

Got called into school as dd(13) felt unwell and it transpired she hadn't eaten. I don't encourage her to eat breakfast although I don't stop her - she rarely gets up early enough to eat it during the week. I honestly thought the school would be sensible about this but what an absolute waste of everyone's time. I thought once I explained that she wasn't neglected or malnourished we could go on our way. Instead a load of hand wringing, unsubstantiated and unscientific bollocks about how important breakfast is and how clearly this is the reason dd felt light headed, even though she hasn't eaten breakfast before school the entire five weeks and this is the first day she has felt unwell.

For context - she is overweight. I'm not going to force another 300-400 calories that she doesn't desire or need at the only point of the day that she doesn't seem to be starving hungry! I make her a cup of tea each morning, she drinks plenty of water. Her house is first for lunch so she eats at 12ish!

It's half term next week and I'm not sure whether I should say anything to the school tomorrow or just let it lie.

@littledog 😂😂😂 I never said OP is the worst example, i actually said it’s the lowest level I have ever dealt with.

Not bigging myself, just stating a fact.

Why do you find me bonkers and unprofessional? Because I have to defend my role and factual information?

Just like you seem to be touchy on your psychologist role?

Honestly regardless of how you see me as a person, whether you think I’m bonkers or not. Let’s put that to a side for one second and address the factual information everyone is ignoring.

There is obvious factual info, given by OP and also advice from professionals but yet it is still being disregarded?

You're only insulting people @dontall and mocking because this has clearly hit a nerve.

Yes, it's touched a nerve with internet sprites who have completely me-railed the thread and continue to do so. It's their nerves that are hit. It's mildly amusing to the rest of the world.

I find it amusing that you can’t answer a simple question 🤔

I find it amusing that you can’t answer a simple question

At last you are discovering the joy of having a sense of humour. Glad to be of assistance! Life's so much better when you can smile.

I’m always smiling 😊😊😊😊😊😊

LostinLondon where did you get the idea I'm a psychologist? You make an awful lot of assumptions about an awful lot of people. And I'm not touchy about my role at all, I'm just more discreet discussing in on a public forum than you are, which makes me see you as unprofessional. I wouldn't consider 'diagnosing' (as you have done) a complete stranger based on a few words they've said, many of which you've twisted a number of times. You even suggested that the OP had an eating disorder which she was projecting onto her daughter. Where the hell did that come from?

I also find you very provocative in quite a fascinating way. You're trying so hard to take the high ground but you're letting yourself down all the time with the insults and attempts to wind people up. And it seems as though you've literally been online non-stop for hours / days maybe even now on this thread! Do you not have a life?

Why are you so invested in this? The OP has gone ...

@littledog but yet you are still here? Double standards? I can multi task.

I have said over and over that some of what I have said is purely an assumption and opinion. This can be disregarded. The facts cannot.

What have I twisted? I have directly quoted.

I never once suggested OP had an eating disorder, I said she possibly had hang ups. If she did not then why did she mention her DD as overweight? Not really relevant is it?
Tbh I do think DD is going down a path of an unhealthy relationship with food. But totally my opinion. I base this on what OP has said. The fact she has put on weight over the last year or two and in the past 5 weeks has begun to skip breakfast.

I’m not going to pretend that the safeguarding bashers didn’t frustrate me. It was directed at me but they couldn’t comprehend that this procedure is not something I have implemented but is a guideline set out by our own government.

I’m responding to people’s posts towards me. Tbh if it wasn’t for people like you directing comments at me then I would be long gone.

Wait a sec, thought you hopped off yesterday?

You mention me in a post and ask why I’m still here? Really??

‘I also find you very provocative in quite a fascinating way. You're trying so hard to take the high ground but you're letting yourself down all the time with the insults and attempts to wind people up. And it seems as though you've literally been online non-stop for hours / days maybe even now on this thread! Do you not have a life?’

I have been patronising at times but not insulting. The only slightly insulting comment was ‘you sound like a moron’, I apologise I offended.

‘Do you not have a life?’ Sounds like an insult to me?

Take some deep breaths, move away from the computer and chill. It's Sunday, you're winding yourself up.

I'm off for . You should do the same.

@littledog honestly, I’m not wound up.

But you are right, time to move on, hopefully.

Enjoy your Sunday!

YABU My daughter is of a similar age, and I always remind/encourage her to have breakfast. Why wouldn't you? Even if it's just a banana. My daughter has two weetabix and a bit of fruit. Sometimes she has something to walk with too. It IS important when they're in school all day.

My DD doesn’t like to eat breakfast but we have finally found something she will happily eat early. Itnis something I have battled since she was little. However I have get it important she eat something and has the energy to get through the morning.
You aren’t helping you daughter by allowing her to go through to lunch time without food. I don’t blanke the school for contacting you. I do however think an email or call would have been better

I never ate breakfast when I was young, I had the standard one, a cup of tea and to cigs on the way to school lol. If she was 6 or 7 I would be concerned but at 13, breakfast is rarely on the cards. I would let it lie unless it happens again and then I would deffo kick up

I was shocked when I read this, if I am honest. My mother would never let me leave for school without some breakfast inside me, even when I was a 15-year-old. She always encouraged me to have something, even if it was just a piece of fruit. Breakfast is just that - the breaking of your overnight fast, and not having something to eat for such a long period between nighttime and lunchtime wreaks havoc with your blood sugar. Also, should you not be encouraging your daughter to rise a bit earlier in the week, so that she has time to eat something? And as for saying she is overweight and you are not going to force another 300-400 calories down her, this is not a responsible attitude to take when raising your child. Why is she overweight? Is she so hungry by lunchtime that she is over-eating then, or snacking from the school shop? Your job, as this girl's mother, is to ensure that she is getting adequate nutrition and no wonder she must feel unwell after 5 weeks of skipping a meal every day. This is just laying the foundation for future problems. Whilst you cannot force your daughter to eat breakfast, why not encourage her to have something like a smoothie?

Watch out good and Cherries - you’ll be accused of being smug, possibly force-feeding and, more importantly, perpetrating the “propaganda” that breakfast for teens is generally beneficial

I daren’t even mention that I get up early to make porridge or eggs for the whole family. Imagine!

No! No! No! This is a passport to obesity - letting your child go to school for FIVE whole weeks without breakfast! You would not have had a leg to stand on if you had challenged the school. I do hope that this will be a wake-up call. Your daughter is still a minor and it is your role, as a parent, to ensure she does not become ill through inadequate nutrition. No wonder she is feeling unwell. Have you asked yourself why?

YABU. Kids can't concentrate at school if they are hungry. She could be overweight because she keeps skipping breakfast. Best thing for healthy weight is a healthy breakfast such as porridge.

Breakfast is important and she should perhaps be taking a banana to have at break time if she really can't eat first thing.
To have nothing until 12pm which is probably 17 hours since her dinner is not acceptable.
You say that she is overweight so help her to make sensible and healthy choices, eat at ALL mealtimes but cut down on portion sizes and encourage her to take up exercise - this will boost her appetite in a positive way.

I agree with onegiftedgal. The child needs encouragement and support in losing some weight in a healthy manner. Teachers will not ask a parent into school for a chat without good reason. They may have noticed other problems with your daughter - how is she supposed to concentrate on her studies when she is hungry? Rather than leave your daughter to lie in bed until the last minute, then leave home without anything inside her, or anything to take to school to eat or drink, if you don't understand the good principles of nutrition, it is in both your child's and your interests to contact your GP for referral to a dietician.

Mandarine I don't think I accused anyone of force-feeding, I think I said that's the only way I'd get DD 11 to eat breakfast before school. We're going to McDonald's for breakfast this morning, she asked if we had to last night. She has to come, or she'll fall back to sleep and she's got school tomorrow, she doesn't have to eat anything.

Personally I’d be grateful the school cared enough to flag their concerns.