Who is BU? re wedding guests

[biser]

Wedding in country house hotel. Naice but not amazingly so.

How much would you, as a guest, be prepared to pay for a double room inc breakfast before you start to suspect "woah, I'm being ripped off to subsidise their costs".

And obviously, if they've booked the whole place, the B&G will be paying for any empty rooms. For that reason, I think 'single, exclusive venue' weddings work best if the B&G pay upfront and either cover all costs for a small wedding party, or pass on a reasonable fee to guests, to ensure the rooms are all used.

But it’s the hotel’s price - nothing to do with the B&G.

How is the wedding ‘better’? Surely they booked a package and the hotel charged? They get the profit and it’s up to the couple as to whether it represents vfm.

Separately, £110 for the night at a wedding hotel isn’t too bad and I’d be reasonably pleased if I were a guest.

My friend decided to charge more for the rooms than the hotel did themselves. I'm talking £200 for a £120 room. She also wanted people to pay for two nights, even if they were only staying one, as she didn't think it was up to her to pay for the empty room.

Bloody hell! I think I’d have one less “friend” after that.

Passing on any cost to the guests so you can indulge your desire for a venue is pisstaking.

I think you are stirring things up. £110 is not unreasonable for a hotel room. You expect to pay more at weekends then mid-week

Having said that the B&G should have negotiated a cheaper flat rate.
Either don't go or stay elsewhere. Don't cause bad feeling at their wedding.

In my experience, weekend rates in country houses are higher than weekday rates. In fact, I'm booking for the weekend now, and all the hotels in my search are more pricey at the weekend.

£150 for a double room. No more than that x

The cost is irrelevant. Rooms could be offered to guests for £500 per night and it wouldn't be cheeky. You pay it, or you stay somewhere cheaper / more convenient for you, you have a designated driver or worst case scenario you decide you'll sit this one out.

The only 'cheeky' scenario I can think of is if taking a room at the venue was a condition of attending the wedding.

I've attended heaps of weddings which have offered accommodation at a set rate (and yes they have been 'genuine' offers, accompanied by a list of alternative hotels for those who wish to do their own thing).

I can't think of a single wedding where we've opted to stay elsewhere locally. Once taxis and so on have been factored in I've never felt it was worth it, and i would happily pay a premium to be on site (patricularly in a lovely castle / manor house location).

I don't care if it technically subsidises the couple's final bill: it's not akin to a cash donation. I get the place to sleep that i needed or wanted anyway, so who cares!?

If the venue accommodation isn't for you for whatever reason make your own arrangements.

God MN is so weird.

How is the wedding ‘better’? Surely they booked a package and the hotel charged?

How do you not understand what they are doing.

Lets say the cost of the wedding is 3k, the B+G pay the 3k and then sell the rooms onto their guests.

By charging guests between £20-£50 more per room the B+G are able to use that money to splash out on extras that the guest are effectively paying for.

Having said that the B&G should have negotiated a cheaper flat rate.

Has anyone done this successfully? I worry that if you knock the price down then the hotel will recoup by skimping on the offering - little things you can't see like having one less serving staff.

£150 maximum if it was a family or close friends. Otherwise I’d be looking for a B&B reasonably near.

@headsdownthumbsupeveryone

The OP said the B&G are not seeing the rate - the hotel is. They haven’t paid a lower rate and added a surcharge.

Therefore how do B&G gain?

Or did you not see the post where OP said the B&G had nothing to do with the charge?

How is the wedding ‘better’? Surely they booked a package and the hotel charged?

Say the cost of the package is £7k. You charge the B&G £6k and make a super-profit on the rooms of £1k.
The hotel still get their money but B&G get a £7k ("better") wedding for the price of £6k.

It's usually the B&G that set the room cost though - is it in this case, OP? Not the hotel.

But really, if the weekday rate is £60-90, you might expect the weekend rate to be £100-150 or so, so £110 seems pretty good.

That’s not how it works!

The hotel has a wedding package which includes factoring in the room rate they charge. The price of the wedding package takes the room rate into account.

That’s the HOTEL - not B&G

And as PP says, these country hotels used for weddings are usually more expensive on weekends - they’re not like corporate hotels.

130 max

Imagine paying a bit less and having a lot of other randoms around at the wedding?

I can't imagine any guests care if other people at staying at a hotel where a wedding they are attending is held. This is the kind of thing the bride and groom may care about, but I wouldn't give a fig. And they would not actually be attending the wedding.

And as PP says, these country hotels used for weddings are usually more expensive on weekends - they’re not like corporate hotels.

So I'm being the naive one? IABU, not them?

A friend was obviously annoyed at me when I refused to book a room to attend a wedding like this. I wasn't drinking, so just drove home that night. She made a big deal about how it was a shame I wouldn't be at the wedding breakfast.

The price of the wedding package takes the room rate into account.

Not in my experience. When we looked several venues gave the option for the B+G to set a price for rooms when discussing it with the venue.

If people can get the same experience for much cheaper then nobody is going to book the room. The fact the B+G have no idea what happens if nobody fills these rooms suggests they are not expecting to pay for them.

I’ve been invited to a wedding like this and I was fucking delighted to be one of the 15 rooms or so that was offered a room first

• It was the same price as staying elsewhere
• No taxis to worry about organising
• Can go back to the room to freshen up etc

The b&g had loads of requests from guests to allocate a room if they had any spare

The additional cost is a piss take but as a premise I don’t see anything wrong with it at all

First off why on earth do you think the weekday rate is more expensive than the weekend - looking at random country hotels the weekend rate is between £10 to £30 more expensive.

So if I am reading correctly the rate you are being charged is £20 more than the standard weekend rate. If so I really dont get the issue as that seems perfectly normal for a hotel

See this as an example www.metropole.co.uk/booknow/

Then I looked at a Hilton that went up nearly £100 for a Saturday

Country house hotels are always more expensive at weekend.

Rate is set by hotel separately from wedding package normally

I think YABalittleU - I dont think paying £110 for the night is unreasonable. Does it include breakfast as that is a deal breaker for me some