Who is BU? re wedding guests

[biser]

Wedding in country house hotel. Naice but not amazingly so.

How much would you, as a guest, be prepared to pay for a double room inc breakfast before you start to suspect "woah, I'm being ripped off to subsidise their costs".

I'm not sure why people think the Op is the bride it's clear she is a guest.

I would not be impressed that's a rise of between £20-£50 whilst its still under the £150 most people said its still blooming cheeky.

@Ifoundanacorn maybe RTFT before launching into incorrect rage.

Hence: who is BU?

In this case no one is imo.

Ifoundanacorn - biser isnt the bride or groom

If I visit DD during the week, the hotels are much cheaper. I would expect to pay more at the weekend. Going to a wedding I would also look at other hotels in the area and cost of taxis.

PyongyangKipperbang I am pretty sure it is the op's wedding!!

I'd pay that and have no problem with it. Doesn't seem unnecessarily cheeky or expensive to me. My ideal scenario is having my own room in the venue so I can retreat whenever I need to.

It does seem a bit off to be paying more than the usual rate, surely there should be a wedding discount?

You'd think so, wouldn't you.
The hotel want 100% occupancy. I have asked B&G what happens if there is a shortfall but they don't know.

These types of things are always a scam and utter CFery on the part of the B&G
That's what we said.

You told your friends you think they’re trying to scam you and that they’re cheeky fuckers?! I’m surprised you’re still invited!

I paid paid £125 a night in September for a double room with breakfast for the two of us near Brighton in a country type hotel ( not a manor )

We had to stay 2 nights as traveling a long way
The wedding was in the hotel but the bride and groom also gave us plenty of other options on where to stay locally
But everyone so around fifty people stayed at the hotel which was lovely

I am pretty sure it is the op's wedding!!

What the heck makes you think that, it is obvious that the OP is a guest

How many rooms are the B&G expecting to fill?

It would depend on a lot of things, how much I would have to pay for transport, how close I was to the couple, how many people I knew there, and, basically, how much fun I would be having while there. There are very few people I can be arsed travelling to AND staying overnight for a wedding for these days.

If it was close friends and wedding wasn't too far, I'd pay 100 quid or so, I guess.

We are guests. Family.

Apologies you are right. I misread it.

The B&G are CF clearly and there is no way I would stay. It is not the cost, it is the principle. I would hate to feel conned and would feel I was being taken advantage of.

I would not feel comfortable going to any wedding that was being paid for by conning the guests. The bride may feel differently because she has a very good incentive to say it is reasonable, it isn't.

I am pretty sure it is the op's wedding!!

How on earth did you come to that conclusion when the OP has stated very clearly, several times, that she is discussing this with the bride and groom

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110 per room is fine. At my wedding we crammed as many people in the wedding party as could fit in all 4 rooms at the historic house we booked.
So roughly 9 people per room. Often they charge more because they expect you to flaut the rules for maximum occupancy.

Do you really think they’re trying to scam you OP?

Why would you even want to go to their wedding if so?

If they’re usually decent people isn’t it more likely that they’re just crap at negotiating discounts?

Maybe I’m lucky but I know very very few people who would deliberately try to scam me.

I have asked B&G what happens if there is a shortfall but they don't know.

From experience they think nothing of trying to add a proportion of the money not made from the unsold rooms back onto the bill of those who agreed to take a room and that leaves you in an even more awkward position.

I am not surprised you said they were being cheeky fuckers that's exactly what they are being.

I had the same situation yesterday. B&G asked if we wanted a room put aside for 2 nights (DH is best man, and every other wedding I know of, has paid for groomsmen, but that's a different matter).

Normal weekend rate is €70 pn - they want €240 for two nights!!!
I went and booked a b&b for 3 nights for the same €240.

Oh, and the groom wanted DH to go down a night early to help him out. He'd put DH up for the night, but DH had to buy him food and drink - CF! At least we'll have that night in the b&b too.

I once went to a wedding like this except the wedding was in a giant barn and the rooms for a handful of guests were in other smaller converted barns. Some were cottages.

Friend and I invited (male and female) but we often went on holiday in twin rooms together so our friend the bride said there were a few rooms available for select guests as there were plans for fun the next day (turned out to be rounders...) at £100 so would we like to stay over so we could drink etc. I wasn't fussed but went along with it.

Our 'room' was a mezzanine with two beds ON THE FLOOR. It was a cottage that was clearly for a couple and these were two single beds ideally for children. The mezzanine was open so the other couple (whom we didn't know) were in the lounge partying on (having invited other guests in) until 3 am when we were ideally wanting to get to sleep. We were not overly impressed (putting it mildly) but it's hard to complain to the bride on the wedding day or day after.

Insult was added to injury when it actually transpired it was £100 EACH for this privilege (we were to pay on leaving). Bearing in mind a taxi home would have been around £35, they were really pulling a fast one. My friend and I refused to pay. Bride's wedding planner came over all agitated. Tough shit, we said. We gave them £50 on behalf of both of us which we felt was sufficient for a bed on a floor in an open plan "room" with no breakfast and said they could suck it up.

Um, Hecky, you just used one sentence of mine and then immediately followed it with one of biser's, who's another poster, in the same quote. That's such incredibly poor form.

biser I wouldn't pay to stay at that hotel and if it made the B&G angry so be it. They're trying to get the guests to pay for part of the wedding, like the poster who said they recouped some of the money for their choice of venue from the guests. It's supremely pisstaking.

And what is all this have breakfast with the bridal party the next day self-indulgent nonsense?

It sounds like the b&g are being a bit disingenuous. I’m pretty sure they’d have to cover the cost of any shortfall so that even if they’re not actually making money to cover wedding costs, they need you to book into the hotel to cover the cost of the rooms.

Personally I’d pay up to £150 for a nice room. Whether it costs more for weekends or weekdays, I should imagine depends on the location of the hotel, if it is more in demand for business people (weekdays more expensive) or social guests (weekends more expensive).

Blimey I didn’t even know this went on at weddings. Explains how some people have fantastic weddings. My friends all got married locally or we just stayed in local hotels.

£110 isn't that bad. I worked in hotels for years, although you'd think that a group rate would be discounted from the standard, it's very often not. This is because the hotel doesn't want to fill it's rooms at cheap rates.

It's not very logical to most people, but it does make business sense.