My partner keeps waking the whole house.

[ThaiRedCurry]

This is one very sleepy house. I have a 5 month old who is a terrible sleeper, a toddler who thinks 5am is a reasonable time to get up in the morning and my partner who is in the police works shifts.
When he is on a late he finishes at around 1am. He comes in the front door and then slams it behind him. Turns on the landing light and the hall and then I hear him in the kitchen. Opening the microwave, reheating tea, slamming microwave door and then pulling out the kitchen chair. Once that's done he comes up the stairs and switches on the bathroom light. Leaves the door open, has a shower uses the toilet and flushes it. Then if this isn't already enough he dumps bag in the babies room (we only have a 3 bed so lots of storage in a wardrobe in babies room) and often even turns on the light in there for good measure. I try not to get pissed off but by this point we are all awake and I then have to get up and settle everyone and try get back to sleep myself.
Should I stop grumbling or is there a way I can approach this subject with him.
I'm so sleep deprived

wonder totally relevant, and I often do an AS If the thread is a bit weird, or I get a certain feel from a poster. Many threads I just take at face value and I’m certainly not nosy just for the sake of it. I know it’s considered bad form, but sometimes one look at OPs other threads can tell you all you need to know about the overall situation. It can save you the time of investing energy into an OP that will never return - such as this one. Everyone can just stop giving OP advice now as she won’t come back, an advanced search will tell you that.

I like a drink, not I just had one. It's 6am here!

My DH does the same job and he has never acted like that,he can come into the house without slamming a door behind him and he'd never go into one of the DC's rooms and stick they're light on,that's not by accident OP,I'm sorry but that's quite an aggressive act in it's self, your partner is being a prick and you need to stand up for yourself and your DC!

I can't understand why you haven't said anything before. And yes, he should settle the children, you are sleeping, he is already awake.

I'd probably start hoovering thebedroom at 5 AM every time he woke you.

Knob, knob, knob.

He sees and hears the kids are up. He sees and hears you settling them. He knows it is in relation to his coming home.

You need to talk to him one day after it has happened (to avoid a middle of the night argument, keeping the kids up longer) and say it is unreasonable, set some clear and basic rules to follow (trying to do things quietly, shutting the kitchen door, avoiding lights where possible, shutting the bathroom door.

He's an adult, it's not rocket science, he can be more considerate with very little effort.

Why on earth would you not speak to him? There is a chance he doesn’t realise how loud he’s and if so he’ll be very apologetic when you raise it. If you tell him and it carries on then he’s a selfish arse.

Looking at her preveposts, and presuming she's telling the truth, she's been off Coke for 2 years then seemingly relapsed a few days ago. She needs help rather than a bollocking right now.

Oswald it’s possible to work shifts without being as intentionally loud as possible and turning the lights on in the childrens’ bedroom at 1am. Or are you just being like that for the sake of it OP?

I'm puzzled why you think suggestions of talking to him has to be during the night, you can communicate during the day to.

OP - you have had 100s of posts telling you that he is a prick, although you won't hear of it.

Many, many posters have told you that no one would act like this regardless of shift-work, stressful job, whatever.

So there is another reason why he is acting like a prick. If you want your relationship to continue, you have to talk to him. And get to the bottom of what is really going on here.

Oswaldspengler

Lol you can't be real.

Because no real person would think a woman should be grateful to their husband for turning on the light in the baby's room at 1am for no good reason.

So?

oswald Don’t be ridiculous. Just because he earns a wage doesn’t make it ok to wake everyone up at stupid o’clock.

There's no need to turn the lights on. There's no need to slam doors. It doesn't matter what their work arrangements are. Why would any civil person do those things when there's no need? And no sane person would think, "Oh it's okay, I'm just grateful he has a job".

I’m a SAHM and DH isn’t an inconsiderate bastard 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'm the breadwinner in my house and I wake up to start work at 6am while OH and kids are still asleep. I quietly make coffee and get to work without waking anyone up. It's pretty easy. Because I'm not a dick.

It’s not normal background noise at that time in the morning.

DIY is a normal thing to do but you wouldn’t be happy with your next door neighbour doing it at 3am