9 year old DD - just plain greedy!

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Sorry... posting here for traffic

DD has always had a big appetite... but recently she has become unbearable, always eating, throwing tantrums etc.

She’s always been on the ‘fuller’ side of healthy, but recently I’ve been noticing she’s looking quite overweight. I decided to step back and track what she ate yesterday:
2 slices of toast with generous amount of Nutella, a banana and small bowl of shreddies.

2 hours later was rolling about on the floor claiming she was ‘starving’ I gave her an apple. Checked up on her a minute later to see her munching on digestive biscuits from the cupboard!

For lunch she insisted on making herself TWO wraps with lots of ham and cheese inside, a bag of salt and vinegar crisps. Said she was still hungry, I offered her carrot and houmous which she reluctantly accepted.

Mid afternoon... caught her raiding the fridge, getting herself a large chunk of cadbury, and a yoghurt.

Dinner was new potatoes, steamed fish and lots of veg. She ate all of it, demanding more which I gave her, and then proceeded to make herself another bowl of shreddies afterwards.

8pm, screaming she’s hungry, that we’re starving her (!!) she had a tall glass of orange juice and a marmite crumpet.

If you ask me, that’s ridiculous! I try to make her only eat healthy snacks etc, but frankly I sometimes need an easy life. Both DH and I are fit, healthy weight. For some comparison, I, 33 years old ate:

Scrambled egg on toast breakfast.

Apple mid morning.

Salad with falafel & quinoa lunch. Cappuccino.

Greek yoghurt & honey mid afternoon

Same dinner

Chunk of cadbury (less than DD) around 9pm.

Her brother, 11, also has a good appetite, eats less than her.

What do I do ?!

Stop buying any snacks, simply do not keep them in the house. If she is hungry the choice is toast or cereal.

Look at eat4life website.lots of useful tips including a sectioned plate showing what a healthy meal should consist of.Sugar is now seen as the most important part of a diet to cut down on.Anything in its most natural form is better.wholemeal better than white for breads pastas. Cereals apart from the basics are so high in sugar,like giving full sugar coke for breakfast.honey is often substituted but its still sugar. Snacks such as nuts,carrot and cucumber sticks,not too much fruit as again its high sugar.We buy very low sugar biscuits meant for diabetics.I personally wouldnt cut anything out completely as it may make her want them more.take her to gp first to make sure there isnt a medical issue and then look at her activities to get her as active as possible

My dd is a similar age and eats loads at the minute. We literally cannot fill her. She isn’t overweight at all so I assume she is going through a growth spurt. Perhaps your dd is the same.

I agree with pp’s about the amount of sugar though. We don’t have unhealthy snacks or sugary cereal like Shreddies in the house, but if we go to the cinema or out for dinner we will all have popcorn or a pudding. This means that sweet foods are not banned, but they are kept as a treat.

While I am sure you don’t mean it, you do come across as judging your daughter’s eating habits rather harshly. I hope that you tread carefully with your dd. 9 is still very young and you can help improve her diet without her even being aware of it.

I was that child accused of being greedy and getting fat. My DM used to go on at me about my weight and how I needed to lose some. I remember her saying that she would weigh me in a month's time and if I'd put on weight she'd smack me. She still makes comments about my appearance and whether the clothes I choose 'flatter' me.

I've been a yo-yo dieter all my adult life, I go on a diet and get slim, maintain it for a year or so and then put on weight again.

I'm a size 14/16 at the moment and not worrying about it as there are bigger things going on in our lives right now.

But please, don't make your DD feel like you're judging her. It's a sure way of giving her life-long issues with food.

OP your daughter is 9, it is going to be difficult for her to break this habit. Do listen to the advice of people telling you to remove all these snacks.
Knowing my history, I limit my Childrens snacks and sugar intake. But I educate them about it at the same time. I may offer my 5yo daughter a biscuit and she will tell me that she’s had enough sugar for the day.
As an adult it took me 3 months and the hugest amount of motivation. Motivation that I didn’t think was possible. This was because I ballooned after giving birth. But I’m back in my old ways.
Let her gradually reduce it.

Sorry I meant DO NOT LISTEN!

IMO too much sugar - so she’s crashing - maybe she’s very sensitive to sugar - strip out the crap - it’s the only way

My dd is like this. I’ve posted before about it. I really think that unless you live with it, you don’t understand it.

We have no crap in the house. So then she will load up on cereal, yoghurt, toast or anything that’s available. I can’t realistically lock away all food. But she will eat what is available.

I fear creating an eating disorder my not allowing her chocolate etc. Because then she will desire it more. She’s 12 now and this has been an ongoing battle all her life. It’s really wearing and tough.

We have 3 other dc. We had crisps etc when they were younger to show that everything is ok in moderation. None of them are like this and one hates sweets and chocolate even though it was available when he was younger.

I feel dammed if I do and damned if l don’t.

She’s now at an age where her friends buy entire bags of cookies and bring them into school. So of course she has one.

What has struck me, is when we have friends to tea, they leave food on their plate and often decline a pudding. Dd never does this, and l just don’t know how to get her to change.

I think their needs to be more understanding of issues like this, where people battle with dc who are overly interested in food. Out of 4 dc, only dd is like this, and she hadn’t been treated any differently than the rest. But she has a much bigger appetite than the others.

A lot of what you're offering her is VERY high in sugar so she is addicted to it. Hence: Tantrums.

You need to slowly take the simple carbohydrates out f her diet and replace them with complex e.g. brown wholegrain pasta, oat cakes and porridge.

Also why are you buying all the sugary foods?

She needs more protein so she feels fuller for longer.

Also swap all drinks for just water and make sure she drinks plenty.

Plenty of eggs, meat fish and yoghurt will help her.

I decided to step back and track what she ate yesterday

I decided to step back and track what I gave her to eat yesterday

OP i am friends with a lady who didn't get a grip on my her daughters eating and temper when she was a similar age. She couldn't cope with the temper (hormones) so allowed her to eat whatever she wanted as well as meals. Her lovely daughter is now 14 stone and very unhappy. You need to distract her or start saying no. Stop handing out healthy alternatives. Absolutely no way anyone eating that amount of food needs more snacks, even if they are healthy.

This is classic carb / sugar craving. Her calories might be fine but her level of carbs/sugar is creating the hunger. The body produces insulin to deal with carbs/sugar and as soon as the energy from the last hit of sugar is used up - about 2-3 hours - then it will trigger hunger cravings for more sugar / carbs.

If you lower her carbs (toast, shreddies, nutella all have masses of carbs/sugar) and increase her protein and fats you will start to see her hunger reduce.

It's basic biology.

well.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/06/27/how-carbs-can-trigger-food-cravings/

Re the time it takes to get through the withdrawal from high sugar/carb diet - at least a week

My 11 year old DS is a little like this

In an average day he will have ..

Cheese and salad bagel
Small handful of nuts
Apple

Fish fingers with rice and veg or sandwiches with crisps, fruit and a couple of biscuits

Couple of raw carrots

Dinner of chicken, veg , potatoes or spaghetti Bolognese or fish etc etc

Pudding

Hot chocolate and toast

It's loads! He never seems to stop. Weight is normal and he's relatively active. I try and keep sweets to a minimum.

OP I was exactly like your DD whenever I was younger... now aged 21 I really struggle with choosing healthy food. I know what's healthy and what's not, but I haven't got any willpower whatsoever! I just haven't got a healthy relationship with food.

From my point of view, don't make a big deal of it (body image issues, food relationships, all of that stuff) but just don't buy the stuff. At all. Maybe for treats like birthdays and Christmas but just let her get out of the habit of eating sugar and rubbish every day. Your own diet sounds fab so just make her the same stuff? You could also try some healthy baking recipes for something fun to do together and to help with the sweet tooth cravings!

Along with nutritional advice, I would like to add that some people eat as an activity. Maybe she's bored and needs something to do besides eat?

Also, antihistamines create food cravings.

I would echo what mooncuplanding is saying with regards to carbs/sugar. I would also switch any carbs she does have to wholemeal. I did this a while ago and dc didn't even notice. My dd is nearly 8, she loves looking at one of my cookery books, choosing something to make together and shopping for the ingredients. Maybe involving her in food preparation might help? Also may sound daft but is she confusing hunger for thirst? Quite often my dc will say they are hungry after a substantial meal, I just ignore and give them a drink, and they usually don't mention it again!

That’s an insane amount of food for a 9 year old. I agree with pp saying you need to get rid of all the sugary stuff in the house and replace them with healthy, protein rich alternatives.

I'm surprised so many children seem to be allowed free access to fridges and cupboards whenever they want.

I don’t think this is necessarily a problem. She’s on half term isn’t she? Out of her routine, probably bored, and there is nice food about- why are you posting this as though it’s a daily occurance?
It’s no wonder so many women grow up with food issues when you look at some of the suggestions here. Lock the cupboards- WTAF?

Incidentally, eating/ feeling full is hugely psychological. I hate the mantra that protein fills you up. It certainly doesn’t for everyone. Know what fills me up? Chip butties. The idea that 2 scrambled eggs slipping around on a plate would make you feel more full than 2 scrambled eggs with toast is laughable

I haven’t had a chance to read the thread so huge apologies if I have missed something.

My dd is about to turn 9 and she has not stopped eating for around 2 months! She is continually “starving”. I suspect she is about to have a huge growth spurt. She is also getting buds so I think hormones are kicking in. Just like you I offer healthy snacks in abundance. She would happily eat crap all day every day.
I don’t want to stop her having the occasional less healthy snack or meal but by god she could eat a litre of ice cream and still ask for more!
I just keep reinforcing healthy stuff to fill up and occasional sugary and fatty things.

I pressed too soon!

There are months when she barely finishes a plate of food and will even bin half an occasional ice cream. I feel I can trust her to know when she has had enough. Whether that is junk, treats or healthy. She eats meat like a dinosaur and devours veg. Junk is just easy as it’s to hand so she asks for it. If I offered to cook a full meal every time she was hungry (currently) she’d say yes!

All last week when she said she wa ahh hey I offered a sandwich and she accepted and practically inhaled it.

Said she was hungry*

I'm surprised so many children seem to be allowed free access to fridges and cupboards whenever they want
Why are you surprised what are you suggesting,ration food,restrict access?
Access to food is pretty fundamental and you decrease supervision incrementally as kids get older
But yes my kids can go get drinks,food,male toast of course they can