9 year old DD - just plain greedy!

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Sorry... posting here for traffic

DD has always had a big appetite... but recently she has become unbearable, always eating, throwing tantrums etc.

She’s always been on the ‘fuller’ side of healthy, but recently I’ve been noticing she’s looking quite overweight. I decided to step back and track what she ate yesterday:
2 slices of toast with generous amount of Nutella, a banana and small bowl of shreddies.

2 hours later was rolling about on the floor claiming she was ‘starving’ I gave her an apple. Checked up on her a minute later to see her munching on digestive biscuits from the cupboard!

For lunch she insisted on making herself TWO wraps with lots of ham and cheese inside, a bag of salt and vinegar crisps. Said she was still hungry, I offered her carrot and houmous which she reluctantly accepted.

Mid afternoon... caught her raiding the fridge, getting herself a large chunk of cadbury, and a yoghurt.

Dinner was new potatoes, steamed fish and lots of veg. She ate all of it, demanding more which I gave her, and then proceeded to make herself another bowl of shreddies afterwards.

8pm, screaming she’s hungry, that we’re starving her (!!) she had a tall glass of orange juice and a marmite crumpet.

If you ask me, that’s ridiculous! I try to make her only eat healthy snacks etc, but frankly I sometimes need an easy life. Both DH and I are fit, healthy weight. For some comparison, I, 33 years old ate:

Scrambled egg on toast breakfast.

Apple mid morning.

Salad with falafel & quinoa lunch. Cappuccino.

Greek yoghurt & honey mid afternoon

Same dinner

Chunk of cadbury (less than DD) around 9pm.

Her brother, 11, also has a good appetite, eats less than her.

What do I do ?!

Can you try stopping buying biscuits? I would say everything else except the nutella and crisps sounds OK. Perhaps have a big bowl of fruit, and let her help herself? You could make energy balls together. Maybe get her enrolled in some sort of sport or fitness thing where she can run a lot of it off? I would take professional advice about how to advise her on her eating rather than on here though as you don't want her to get a complex about food.

1. Get rid of all snacks and biscuits from house
2. if she’s hungry between meals she’s only allowed fruit
3. ensure she’s drinking enough water (some people eat coz they’re dehydrated )
4. ensure she’s not bored

Good luck

That's true amused, nothing's forbidden in our house.

DD asked for a snack before bedtime the other day, I didn't give her one, because it would have made her late for bed, I think I possibly did the wrong thing.

Her breakfast was actually three breakfasts but none of them likely to be filling.

Get rid of crisps and chocolate in the house.

Her lunch doesn't sound bad, my nine year old might polish two ham and cheese wraps.

Give her a bigger portion of dinner as long as it's extra protein like chicken and vegetables not extra chips rice pasta potatoes.

A crumpet with marmite isn't so bad.

I'd up the protein. Get rid of snacks and review breakfast. Eggs and bacon might actually fill her up and have fewer empty calories. Shredded are better than many cereals but still loaded with sugar which does nothing for their appetite.

Honestly OP I think a different kid would have access to the exact same food, but would naturally self regulate to have/want smaller portions and be skinny. In fact I know kids who have v similar meals and snacks to yours but are v slim. They'd only want to pick at a single wrap and not eat much of their dinner or have a crumpet though, and their parents would probably egg them on to eat more.

While diet isn't perfect if this is a long standing thing I don't think it's to blame.

I think unless you have a child who has an insatiable appetite and borders on overweight despite efforts to keep things relatively healthy and control portions, it's very very hard to understand what it's like.

Maybe get checked out for intolerances or coeliac. Good luck.

Could you gradually decrease the amount on her plate to cut calories. Obviously do not have biscuits, choc, crisps in the house. If they aren't there they can't be eaten. Could you possibly distract DD getting her involved in something when she claims she is starving? Really challenging problem though.

OP, you can't compare the intake of a 9 year old against a 33 year old. Yes, you are taller but you are mature enough to fully understand the ramifications of eating more food than you need in an adult way and the implications for your overall health in a way she cannot yet. Also she is developing mentally and physically so it's not fair to compare the two of you.

She may be genuinely hungry if her body is not making enough of the hormone that makes you feel full - something more protein heavy might help.

I don't think it's excessive but they're better dietary choices to be had. I'd stop buying junk in and fill her up on protein fruits and vegetables. Growing girl needs to eat

Does your DD drink much OP?

We've found with our youngest DD that quite alot of the time she was thirsty rather than hungry.

As for snacks would she eat things like nuts/seeds/Hard boiled eggs/crudites and homous or cheese spread/fruit.

• get rid of the sugary snacks - if they're not there she can't take them
• make sure she drinks plenty of water as it's easy to confuse thirst and hunger at that age
• mine want to eat a when they're bored - keep her busy/active out of the house

Sounds like blood sugar spikes and dips need limiting - more protein needed throughout the day to even it out - nuts and cheese are good. Also drink more plain water and keep up the fibre - try oatcakes instead of digestive biscuits perhaps - ryvita or similar dipped in normal yoghurt is a good dippy thing to have which takes longer to eat so she might get the full reflex sooner. Am sure you are showing a good example at mealtimes and I know its not easy, but you are asking too much to expect her to resist nutella etc if its there IMHO, it is as if you bought it, so it must be ok? Good luck, lots of us have been in the same place to some extent.

Sounds like blood sugar spikes and dips need limiting - more protein needed throughout the day to even it out - nuts and cheese are good.

Nuts and cheese are a terrible, terrible snack idea for an already overweight person.

Cheese is stupidly calorie dense.

Hormones/growth spurt. My teen put on a few pounds age 11, she slimmed down a couple of years later. I worried at the time but she was fine. I did watch her diet more carefully but amounts didn't worry me so much.

OP it sounds like you're on a diet yourself? Why is your diet so strictly healthy but your child is munching on cereal, nutella and biscuits? Hide the biscuits, swap the nutella for boiled eggs or good energy foods etc

Half her portion sizes, up her fluid intake and stop her helping herself to extra snacks.

Check out Radiant Recovery to help your daughter with this, her brain is addicted to all the sugar. Just taking away all the sugar means she'll go cold turkey, but won't recover - will just make matters worse. Good luck x

You seem to be piling all the responsibility onto her. She's only 9 years of age.
It is you who does the shopping. Your hands put the food into the trolley. Your hands stock the cupboards.
You are the one who establishes habits that Nutella and Toast is 'a thing' and crisps with your lunch is 'a thing' and second helpings for dinner is 'a thing' in your house. It's what you guys do.
You can't blame your daughter for mis-interpreting or not noticing boundaries if there no one is there providing guidance or boundaries around mealtimes.
Mealtimes should be started, then finished, then kitchen closed. Certain snacks on weekday afternoons and maybe different snacks on weekends. A, B or C you can't have X, no sorry because we don't eat chocolate for breakfast anymore because B is better for energy. Don't refer to her weight or size.

Why does your daughter get to be called 'greedy'. Maybe equally call yourself 'Lazy' about managing her food intake better? You are blaming your daughter for things a parent is responsible for.
It's odd that you say this 'if you ask me that's ridiculous!' as if you are a bystander who glanced in through the window at a girl who has nothing to do with you. Are not aware that yourself are a major factor, if not THE most important factor in the eating habits in your household.

I was like this as a pre-teen. My mum used to pull me aside in front of friends and tell me off for being greedy. I ended up anorexic as a young adult. I’d tread very very carefully around this age. Once the image-conscious teenage years begin she will likely cut down on her own terms.

Doesn't actually sound like much food to me, just not very filling.

Fruit veg lean proteins at meal times not sugar laden nutella type foods...
Egg & toast fruit & yogurt for breakfast.
Wholemeal bread lean meat veggie sticks for lunch ...biscuits & cheese & fruit for a snack.. meal fish good carbs & veg for tea.
That should fill her...no sugar spikes.
Don't tell her she's putting weigh on guide her in the right direction before she gets to big school.

What Faith and others say.

Parents who think if their children as disgusting and greedy can't hide it and are setting their kids up for life long destructive relationship with food.

Coming from someone who was in your DD position as a child, help her while she’s young.
I’ve grown up constantly overweight. It affected my ability to love and appreciate myself. I always wished my parents limited the amount of food I ate as a child.
I will definitely recommend not to get rid of all the junk food. I ate quite a lot of junk as a child on top of a very healthy diet. Looking back, I was so big. One day my mum and dad stopped buying all the junk. So I then used to buy it in the corner shop for myself. Sneaking it when I could. When I left home I binged, I still do.
Encourage your daughter to limit her own junk food. Teach her that it is a treat.
The worst thing you can do is take it all away.

Listing your own humble brag quinoa salad and an apple "for comparison purposes" next to your daughter's Nutella toast and packet of biscuits just makes you look as though you see your 9 year old daughter as a rival in some wierd way.

Difference being,she’s a child growing bones and developing.shes not greedy
You’re a mature adult, in all likelihood she is hungrier than you
Bin the crisps and chocolates offer fibre. Protein and a filling diet

My kids are frequently hungry, not greedy. Hungry from running about,and growing up
Don’t call a child greedy it’s so mean

Half her portion sizes
Ignore this advice.Please op do NOT starve your daughter!