To ask if you have children how often do you go out socialising with friends ?

[Peachsnowpop]

As the question says....

Sorry, that sounded judgy. I do love her!

My kids are young (9,3 and 2). I get out probably 3/4 times a year by myself. I don't really mind. I think it's a good balance. I'd rather spend my time with the kids and my DH, and chuck in the odd meal out with friends and spa day with my sisters. My friends have young kids too, so trying to get a time and date to go out for dinner that suits us all is usually pretty tricky.

I do go to a gym class 3 x a week, but I have to get up at 5.20 to sneak out when they're all asleep to go. I wasn't really counting that though as "going out".

2/3 times a week. I also book weekends with just friends probably every few months although September I had 3 weekends away! I don't need to be with my kids 24/7! They have a dad who is here too!!!! Mine are aged 18/17/12/7 though so much easier to leave them x

At least once a week, but budget dictates what - Might be popping to a friends with a bottle of wine, a couple of lime and sodas in wetherspoons, or dinner in Nandos. Or even meeting for a coffee at 6pm and I’m home by 8.30. About once a month I’ll do a dinner and drinks night out, or a bottomless prosecco brunch, or cocktails out somewhere.
Kids are 15, 11 and 8.

My dcs are 3yo and 9mo and we don’t have any family or friends nearby, so going out, even for an evening with friends means a trek into London. I do that maybe 4 or 5 times a year. DH and I get out alone together even less than that, but that’s our choice really, as we don’t want to get a babysitter very often. Maybe when the dcs are a bit older we will.

When my kids were little, hardly ever. Now the youngest is 10, I go out a lot! Not out drinking but that’s personal choice.. but often have meals, spa days, coffee etc. It’s really important to me and I feel like I have a life away from the family home

When they were younger about once a month. Now the the oldest is 16 we go out whenever we want, money permitting. It's fab!

Usually once a month with DH and we try and have a couple of child free weekends a year.
Once a week (ish) on my own and we socialise regularly with the kids.

Although, I was out Fri and Sat night and I'm out this afternoon 😁 but that doesn't happen often.

I don't agree that you have to completely forfeit your social life just because you're a parent.

Out to a bar, or for a meal it’s probably twice a month on average, but I meet friends for lunch, or to walk the dog a few times too. Same for dh, though he’s out with work a bit more (but his business partner is also his friend, so it’s also social)

Probably averages out once a week with friends including things like lunch/dinner, a coffee out, or a big night out e.g been out loads this month (lots of birthdays) but didn't go out at all in August,
With just dh prob about 4 times a year as we struggle for babysitters.

I don’t actually have any local friends so the whole question is moot.

seeing friends for:
walking and chatting about 2-3 times a week (usually at 7:45 til 8:30am or during beavers)
coffee and lunch about every fortnight
Pub/restaurant- once or twice a week
big night out (past midnight) about every 2 months
weekend away (spa/festival/cottage//abroad) twice a years

Two or three times a week, mostly in the day time for coffee/lunch or to do some art. In the evenings more like once or twice a month.

2-3 times a year as a couple, and maybe another 2-3 times on my own with friends.
2x DDs aged 2 and 5, OH works shifts so we struggle!

Never. Our hamster has more of a social life! We've no family to watch the kids and DH works every Friday & Sat night so there's no point. To be completely honest we're not entirely bothered, on the nights DH doesn't work we'd rather watch a movie anyway.

This week I went to the theatre one night, and have had a quick drink with friends Fri and Sat (early eve when DC's have been at parties or clubs).
I don't feel I go "out out" a lot but it's prob more than I think!

4-6 times a year

“I don't agree that you have to completely forfeit your social life just because you're a parent”

Well, it totally depends on your household income, doesn’t it? kids are expensive. Childcare is expensive. Even if you’re a SAHM and don’t pay for childcare that’s an income that’s lost. Clothes, shoes, school dinners and trips. Costs a bloody fortune. A babysitter if you don’t have family nearby.

Housing is outrageously costly these days. I don’t know how some of you have the money to go out to bars and restaurants once a week and spa weekends a few times a year. Presumably a large household income.

Lots of families with young children struggle financially. DH and I used to go out once a week and do a lot of travelling, pre-kids.

Completely different now. We have been through the struggling years , now we’re up to being ok money-wise but therr are various reasons why we dont go out as much as we did pre-kids. we struggle for time to go out. DH works away a lot and on call, we don’t have the energy or time we had to go out after work like we did years ago, ageing and ill parents mean babysitting is now difficult. And one I hadn’t anticipated- the kids are old enough (early-mid teens) to be put out at being left with a stranger and told that they’re not allowed to come with us!! They both like nice restaurants as much as we do. If we tell them they had to stay at home with a ready meal while we went to a nice restaurant for the night I woukd feel guilty (unless it was for our wedding anniversary).

When mine were smaller I would go to aqua fit once a week.

Now they are teenagers I go for dinner once a month with friends. I also go to the allotment and shopping on my own but I’m not sure if that counts

@curlyhaired I was referring to people who say once you have a child you shouldn't have a full social life anymore - as was inferred by a previous poster.

Of course all of the things you listed have an impact however, a social life doesn't have to be expensive. It costs very little to go round to friends with a bottle of wine. We socialise once a week with a group of friends. It's a mixed group of couples, singles and some of us have children. We take it in turns to host and it only costs us a bottle of wine and some snacks. Plus we don't need a babysitter!

One thing I do disagree with though. I think it is important for a couple to have adult time. You shouldn't feel guilty about that. My 4 year old knows that sometimes mummy and daddy like to do things on our own. We do lots as a family but that couple time is sacred.

Never.

Once every couple of months, I book a hotel room with my friend. The DDs are left with their Dads, and we have 24 hours of doing what we want! (This normally involves going to the cinema, then sitting in the hotel room watching another film and nattering, because we're hardcore). I need this time away, for my sanity. Doesn't mean I don't love my DD - I do, but 3 year olds can be hard work!

It probably averages out at once a month but my friends mostly live quite far away. Plus, given half the chance and a babysitter DH are more keen to do stuff together (we're both antisocial gits ;))

Less when my kids were little but that was because they both EBF for ages and I moved away for about 3 years. Then it was about 2 or 3 times a year. Now they are 14 and 11 and I would say I go out about once a month (sometimes less, sometimes more).