To not feed my kids 3 meals a day?

[GunpowderGelatine]

If I feed my kids 3 meals a day, they just don't eat all of what I make them (they are 5 and almost 2). I loathe wasting food, and they probably leave about a whole meals worth altogether if I feed them 3 times a day. I usually give them a little something for breakfast, like half an apple - or if they're not hungry when they wake up they'll have something mid-morning - then the odd little snack through the day and then a full meal at dinner time. They're hungry enough by then that they'll eat it all. They never complain of being hungry and rarely ask for food.

Similarly I never have breakfast in just never hungry in a morning, I always wait til lunchtime.

AIBU to think that, for some, 3 meals a day is excessive?

I imagine it will aaaaall change come teenage years 

@gunpowder - not to derail your thread but I just night weaned my 2.6 yo a couple of weeks ago. Like you, I was feeding 2- 4 times a night and obviously it had to stop! It was honestly a million times easier than I thought it would be. Just 2 nights with full on crying before he got the message. Unfortunately he is still waking 2 x a night but at least now dh can see to him!

@dustarr73 I am making it available, they are only taking a few mouthfuls.

I'm getting snarky with people who've taken it upon themselves to diagnose me with an eating disorder, or who've skewed my words or claimed I don't feed my children anything. That's not "having an opinion" it's being a dick for the sake of it. It's frankly pathetic and yes I will call it out

I posted more to see if anyone else was the same not out of any particular concern

some your just giving them 1/2 an apple, grapes and yoghurt

A good example of twisting what I've said - I've never once said they only have the above all day 🙄 also, this may shock you but some people don't eat the exact same way every day. Sometimes they do have a more plentiful day than others.

With the breast milk if it's just for comfort Id be worried about his teeth at night, not as bad as a bottle but still putting him at risk of tooth decay. I think I'd want to look at stopping that soon.

No thanks. The evidence linking tooth decay and extended feeding is sketchy at best. The WHO recommend feeding until 2 and beyond so I trust I'm making the right decision for him

I've read the full thread. I posted on Page 1 @ 21.02 "From what you've written" - haven't changed my mind. You've just "drip fed" the whole post - for example, it took till Page 4 to mention you B/F your son.
You have posts from Mumsnetters on every page, except one, indicating personal experience of eating disorders.
Posters @ 11.17 and 11.22 just summarize it all.
In conclusion, would I be correct if I said that the "hearty meal" at dinnertime, and this morning's bacon butties, are courtesy of your DH.?

As long as they're eating and nutritionally satisfied.

For my two year old, he has a small breakfast (a croissant and a banana), then mid morning he will have some fruit then at lunch it'll be a sandwich, some crisps and a small pack of mini chocolate biscuits then he will have dinner around 5 o'clock, and a small snack again just before bed time.

But sometimes he will have three meals a day as well. It completely varies. Our routine is never the same as he goes childminders 3 days a week.

No otters I do pretty much all the cooking - why do you ask?

And I'm not sure it's drip feeding by not mentioning breastfeeding when, as posters point out, it's not exactly a 'meal'

You indicated in one of your posts that you might be a "shit cook".
You've been selective what you've commented on from my last post.
Not wishing to start another topic, but there are links - B/F & tooth-decay.

But if your children are some days eating plenty and some days not eating very much that's entirely normal for children their age. It's normal for everyone really.

I've seen a fair few studies that link nocturnal breastfeeding to tooth decay in children over 18 months, i wouldnt recommened stopping at 18mnths but as he's over 2 I'd be looking to stop soon. Nothing drastic or immediate but I would be thinking about stopping nocturnal breastfeeding as I would be worried about the effect it will have on his teeth. It's your child and you can do what you like.

otter the shit cook was a joke. Honestly some fucking people!

Can you provide credible sources to the links please between breastfeeding and tooth decay and that most toddlers definitely experience this even with a healthy diet?

Your attitude stinks!
Last post from me.

otters eh?! Why?

And I don't understand what you were getting at asking if my DH cooks? Is this part of another eating disorder diagnosis?

Kids diets balance out over several days. They self regulate. The do NOT need to eat three meals a day. But that doesn't mean they shouldn't be offered them.

If adults did the same like we used to do over the centuries and self regulate then most of us wouldn't be fat! I doubt cavemen had breakfast, lunch and dinner afterall...

I think a lot of these replies are completely hysterical. Just because they aren't big breakfast esters doesn't mean you are starving them. Your original post sounds like they don't have breakfast or lunch, but further in you describe a typical day that includes lunch so maybe people are confused. My toddler often doesn't have lunch depending on his nap time and school run, but I'm not worried about his food intake.

For your 5 year old I would try to encourage something else before school though. Would she eat a smoothie? Putting a spoon of ready brek in would add loads of calcium and other vitamins as it's heavily fortified. Would she have a fruit or yoghurt pouch or cereal bar? Maybe flapjack or breakfast biscuits? I know they usually have a lot of sugar in but it might tempt her to have something. I wouldn't worry about the toddler.

OP, I didn't mean he shouldn't have breast milk! I meant that on its own it isn't sufficient , as some poster/s seemed to think. If he's eating normal food as well he won't be short of normal nutrients.

I worked in a school in a faraway country where small children arrived , having been almost exclusively breast fed as there was bugger all else to feed them. The nuns who ran the school spent the first term feeding them iron-rich foods ( mostly eggs and dark green veg ) so they'd be alert enough to learn.

I give my kids 3 square meals I mostly throw in the bin and get pestered for snacks so I know your pain OP.
I hate waste and sometimes want to just shout "just eat it, they're are children starving in Africa/Syria/parts of England/etc."
But you know what? I keep on making food and throwing it away and don't shout at them at all. I just say to myself "I did my job, I gave you breakfast/lunch/dinner not my issue if you won't eat it."
If they are hungry they will eat. And if rather throw away food (begrudgingly) than worry they're not getting enough (which they definitely are, actually hungry kids will eat almost anything they're given)

That said I was shocked at other peoples portions for their kids at one point and realised They were never going to eat my oversized portions 🙈

Some days they eat like mammoths and others they eat like mice. Sometimes I have to give them seconds, others they don't eat firsts.

I just put any leftovers in a tub and try to waste as little as I can by serving them a little at a time.

If the kids are having the apple as soon as they wake, maybe it's worth getting them dressed and downstairs before offering them some more substantial food instead.

Could be that they are not hungry first thing, but by the time they are at the table they'll have the appetite to go for a bowl of porridge or similar.

OP..hiya ..forgive me i havent read all the posts but my little girl is so difficult with breakfast..she hates it.She is 6 yrs old and the only thing I have found that does the job of getting breakfast inside her is to get her up earlier.I wake her at 7 a m then by 8 she is ready for a small amount of something.She does seem to enjoy it better..weekdays she has a yogurt pouch with some fruit,its nt much but she can choose her own that also seems to help.At weekends she sleeps in and has a brunch about 11 ish and she totally eats all that..She loves crumpets or a full english etc.School days their class have fruit at 10 ish and she always eats that and she does eat her school lunches even if its only half a jacket potato and beans and cheese,I always cook a dinner at tea time for all of us but she will eat most of it.I can't offer any advice really but I would think about not snacking at home if you can cos I think it does help the little ones feel more ready for lunch..Best Wishes

My 1 year old has breakfast, snack x3/4 then dinner. He doesn't eat lunch, he will eat little and often and that's ok. Breakfast is the main meal that they need and as long as you're confident they're getting enough for them then that's ok. My eldest was always small, with a small appetite. Since she started school and was eating crap school dinners and putting every day she started to gain unnecessary weight (shes now overweight which were slowly tackling) I don't believe in pushing children to eat, they know when THEY are hungry not when they SHOULD be hungry by everyone else standards

I haven’t read all the posts but I don’t think this is that bad as long as they are getting all the nutrients they need. At this age, especially for the 2 year old Id be more concerned about healthy fats although if they’re breastfed that shouldn’t be a problem. Nutrient dense foods such as eggs, meat, fish, full fat dairy and some fruit and veg will likely give them most of what they need at this age. I wouldn’t try to tempt them with biscuits and chocolate as what’s the point of stretching their stomachs for nutritionally void foods.

This 3 meals a day thing is a social norm and not a requirement for a healthy body. I would encourage them to eat when they are hungry and stop when they are full. It will also give their digestive system a break. Maybe encourage them to drink a glass of water when they wake up just to keep hydrated.

I think the reason that most adults are overweight is probably down to this culture of 3 meals and 2/3 snacks. If you work out the calorie intake of that it is likely to be far more than what children your age need unless the adult is really good at knowing portion sizes for children. Children tend to get away with it due to being so active and having faster metabolisms. But it seems to catch up with most people in the end so maybe encourage your children to listen to their own hunger cues rather than the ones instilled by society.

I have a packet of 🍪. Would you like to share them?? Some of the posters on here are fucking nuts. The op has had so much of her replies twisted and made to look like shit a shit mum and a lazy ass hole! Give the woman a break! She has come on here to see if other parents experience the same eating pattern as her children, she hasn’t asked for anyone’s opinion on HER own diet and lifestyle and she certainly hasn’t asked for a motivational dressing down. Do some of you realise that there is a real person behind this OP?? It’s not a fucking robot posting and your replies are an utter disgrace.
I’m seriously ashamed with womanhood right now.

My DD (nearly three) can hugely vary in her appetite. Some days she’ll have a several stage breakfast (weetabix, fruit, bit of toast, yoghurt) and then scarf a hot lunch and dinner, asking for seconds. Today she rejected breakfast after a few shreddies, had a few pieces of pasta and veg for lunch and only ate the carrots and mash from her dinner- it all seems to even out. As long as she has fruit, veg, dairy, some carbs and a multivitamin every day I don’t feel too worried.
She’s not much of a snacker though- she doesn’t ask for food between meals at all really unless we’re on hols having ice cream or something. I try not to make a big deal out of food or pressurise her to eat more- she knows her own mind I think.