to not take something of a deceased neighbour

[GoingNuckingFuts]

my neighbour passed away two weeks ago she was 68 (im 30) i often (2/3 days a week) would go sit with her have a brew and a jangle (we could of ruled the world us two with our putting to rights convos haha) i would see if she needed a hand with anything around the house, shopping picking up, even though she had a friend a few days a weeks to help her with these things, i would often put some washing out, iron a few things, or pick her up a few bits and bobs, would make her some lunch take over cakes if id been baking, because i wanted to help my friend and i really enjoyed her company.

she became a frail lady over the last 12 months but remained sassy as hell, absolutely hilarious, and i loved spending time with her.

she was a good friend to me when i had cancer 3 years ago she and another neighbour (in 50's) would often make pans of stew/sunday dinners/spag bol, take our son over to their house's for lunch/dinner or just to play with their grandkids for an hour or so to give me and my DH a rest while was going through chemo,(i was very ill i nearly died im very lucky to be here) both ladies actually did more for me than my own mum who didn't cope well with my illness,

her passing was a shock but not huge as she had been really poorly, it broke my heart, i long for my friend back, she has left a little gap in my life, i miss our conversations more than anything, we had such fun.

her family have now been told they need to empty her house within the next 4 weeks I've offered to give them a hand and they have been grateful, her 3 sons have asked me to come and pick a little trinket of hers to keep as a thank you for all the help in her last few years but i really don't want anything, im just happy i got to spend time with my friend in her last few days and that i helped her with odd little things, and happy i have some fantastic memories with an incredible lady, i don't want her sons to think im ungrateful for the offer i really am not i am just as i said happy i made such a lovely friend and i hopefully made her life a little easier as she made mine when i was ill,

would it be unreasonable to not accept a small gift? i feel like it might be, she has quite a lot of grandkids and people she was friends with for much much longer (we had been friends around 5 years) that should have a little token, i don't want to offend them .

thoughts, please.

[Truckit]

Jean

[bacardigan]

To Jean (from Lancashire) x

[notsohippychick]

Oh my this is wonderful. Truely fabulous.

I dont drink anymore but raising a cuppa to wonderful Jean x

[Aprilislonggone]

To Jean, from the North East
Xxx

[paxillin]

I missed 8pm.

[continuallychargingmyphone]

So has the op

[Emmageddon]

In memory of Jean, a sassy woman who was a truly wonderful friend to Emily
from Emma in Llanfihangel y Creuddyn

[NWQM]

A slightly belated 🍷 to Jean

[Redglitter]

So has the op hmm

What a surprise

[Veterinari]

A bit late to the tribute but 🍷 Jean!

And 🍷 to you too OP, like finds like

[continuallychargingmyphone]

It is a bit embarrassing

[TrueLoveWays]

To Jean

[ConfusedMum82]

I'm so sorry for your loss OP, your neighbour sounds amazing.
I was in a similar situation. I volunteered at a community second hand sale and cafe, twice a week for 4 years. Older ladies and gents were our main visitors, and, as often happens, regulars were like family after a while, and we kept an eye out for them.
One lady was a star, she was impressed by my love of vintage, and she showed me her prize possession, a Kelly bag. She promised it to me should the worse happen but I said I wouldn't hear of it and she was going to be around for far longer.
I forgot all about it, but two years later, we found she had passed away. We were all gutted, she was just so full of life that we never saw it coming.
She had left all her belongings to the charity, she had no family, but had left instructions that all us volunteers be given something. The bag was left to me, and bless her, she had never forgotten. I have it now, only use it on very special occasions, but it makes me smile so much.
It's not strange to be offered something, it could be a mug, or a tea towel, just something that you can look on and smile and remember how great your friendship was.

[DitheringBlidiot]

In a bit late but have just read the whole thread, bawling my eyes out and raising a glass to your dear friend jean, and to yourself, what a lovely friendship you must have had 💕

[TheMonkeyMummy]

A little late to the party but DH and I are a) chuckling over her photo on the wall b) raising a glass. She sounds amazing.

Good luck, OP on your saving and baby journey. X

[Whoisshequestionmark]

Amazing 💗

[InspectorIkmen]

This thread has touched bits of me that have lain stony for decades.

I'm literally howling here.

Lots and lots of OP

[Theyprobablywill]

Been out missed the 8 o'clock. But I'd like to say Hi! to Jean.

I knew someone called Hope, but she slept with so many mingers we used to call her Charity.

[Schuyler]

When you think the world is full of horrible stuff, you come on here and see the beauty in the world. :)

[Toomanytoremember]

[purplepigs]

I like the suggestion of taking the mugs that you often had tea from they are going to be the least expensive thing in the house but will give you the most memories

I also agreed it is probably helping them out lots to knowing that you were a great friend to her and that this is ta away to thank you

Let us know what you decide

[donajimena]

purple there was a gift box awaiting her.

[purplepigs]

@donajimena I can't find that bit ! LOL

[PaulHollywoodsSexGut]

The OP hasn’t returned.

That’s unusual

[donajimena]

Nah I don't think so.