AIBU?
MIL and FIL have turned up uninvited
scrabblechampion · 14/10/2018 10:58
I don’t want them here. DH is out (sport he does every Sunday) there’s washing all over the place, the place is a tip, I’ve got a cold, there’s no food in (DH going to supermarket on the way home) and they’re sat on the sofa in the other room waiting for him.
I let them in so as to not cause a scene and now I’m crying in the bedroom.
I hate it when they do this. I’m in my 30s, I should be able to tell them to get out of my home.
Can’t get hold of DH, he leaves his phone in the car. Have left a message to come straight home and get rid of them.
They KNOW he’s out at this time. They pretended they forgot. I don’t know what they want.
pointythings · 14/10/2018 12:17
I don't tolerate people just popping by - I want advance warning so that I can say no if I don't want visitors. OP, you need to have a serious talk with your DH and then both of you, speaking as one, need to set this boundary with your ILs - no more popping by unannounced. And if they do, just don't respond. if people have no boundaries, they have to learn them the hard way.
And some of the people on this thread are really strange...
chocatoo · 14/10/2018 12:17
Even if I didn’t really want Visitors I hope it would never show in the hospitality I offer. Since when did parents need to make appointments to see their families. How sad. I hope when the kids of lots of PPs marry, their partners are more hospitable. No wonder so many old people are so lonely, there are so many people with hearts of stone on here today.
OP I think you should remember your manners and get out there and make a cup of tea and manage some small talk. Make your visitors welcome. If you must, perhaps you could suggest that next time they call ahead to make sure you are in.
specialsubject · 14/10/2018 12:21
unless you think they will turn violent (in which case call the cops) just state the obvious - you aren't feeling well and are not up to visitors. your husband isn't carrying his brickphone so can't be contacted, they could always drive off to find him if needed.
thanks, inlaws, another time, goodbye. Normal human beings will understand and wont be offended. If they are offended they are selfish pigs and aren't worth bothering with.
sitting crying isn't going to sort any of this.
Spiceyrum · 14/10/2018 12:23
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Wherearemycarkeys · 14/10/2018 12:25
I'd have gone out there crying if I was sick and let it all out. I've got no filter when I'm sick, I feel so sorry for myself! I'd literally walk out there in tears and say that you're not well, you don't want to entertain, why would they come all this way without informing you first, it's really inconvenient, it really upsets you and makes you stressed, you usually feel like you can't say anything as they overreact but this time you're really unwell and so it's just too much and this needs to stop. immature? Yes. Embarrassing? Yes. But I guarantee they'll leave immediately! Maybe even apologise 
VioletCharlotte · 14/10/2018 12:27
Popping in is normal in some families, but I agree it can be very annoying, especially if you're not well. There's not much you can do on this occasion, but maybe have a think about how you could handle the situation better next time. It sounds like you need to work on being more assertive, this'll help you in all areas of your life. Hope you feel better soon.
Jakethekid · 14/10/2018 12:27
Oh OP I feel for you. I'm another one of those that doesn't like unexpected guests. I like to be prepared, not walking around in my pj's with no make up on and hair barely brushed. I get so embarrassed if my home is a tip aswell.
I live in a flat and my in laws used to decide to show up randomly (funny because they never bother to come here unless they want someting) and of course would press my buzzer. Repeatedly. This would wake up my son.
Now I just ignore it, pray they will go away, and put my child back to bed.
OoohAyyye · 14/10/2018 12:33
She's well enough to post on MN.
snowflakey
All twatty comments to name a few.
Do some people only comment to be completely unhelpful and have little regard to the possibility that they may further upset the OP?
We all live different lives. What might upset one will not upset another. But surely we are all socially and emotionally intelligent enough to understand this?
OP, I really do hope you are okay and that you somehow get them to leave. Go easy on yourself and don't let this morning ruin your entire day 
Nanny0gg · 14/10/2018 12:35
Not all people are nice
Evident by so many of the posts on here.
I know it's a miserable Sunday, weather-wise, but have so many of you got nothing better to do than be spiteful behind a keyboard?
Spend the time brushing up on your comprehension skills and look for the clear meaning and intent behind the OP's posts.
Elephant14 · 14/10/2018 12:42
Thank god you've gone in for a hug Madd - I hope the OP comes back but I wouldn't blame her if she didn't - WTAF has happened here today?
Someone posts "I'm struggling" and then dozens of people jump in and say well tough luck we're ok so you must be at fault?!
Never.
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