In thinking having more than 5 sexual partners doesn't make you a raging whore bag?

[fifithefoof]

Following on from the last thread .....

Seriously how are you misunderstanding such plain English? Im not indifferent about the sex. The sex is fantastic. I’m indifferent about the need for a relationship.

I would like to pick you up on this though. You're not coherent, it like you think whi your fwb is and the fact that the sex you have with him is amazing are entirely unconnected. Methinks you might not be being 100% honest with yourself

Well you're certainly not selling it very well, it all sounds very mechanical and soulless. I play tennis with a partner, I would still play without her, but I like playing tennis with her and would miss her

I’m not trying to sell it. I don’t get points for recruitment...

I would like to pick you up on this though. You're not coherent, it like you think whi your fwb is and the fact that the sex you have with him is amazing are entirely unconnected. Methinks you might not be being 100% honest with yourself

No. It might be unconnected for you.

I have no need to be dishonest with myself. I’m happy, healthy and enjoy the sex life of MY choosing.

We have good sex. He isn’t the only person in the world with whom I would have good sex. Sure I like him. Nice chap. Relationship? No. Don’t love him.

But then YOU think love and sex are so totally linked they can’t be unraveled. I don’t.

Might NOT be unconnected for you. Typing in the bath is a bad idea.

Semantics, you call it fwb, most people would call it a relationship. Boyfriend and girlfriend. What would be done to change the status of it ?

So you're saying (comes over all Cathy Newman) that what he looks like, how he sounds, who he is have no contribution to the quality of the sex ? Pull the other one.

lorna you don't understand cognitive dissonance so please stop using the phrase.

Semantics, you call it fwb, most people would call it a relationship. Boyfriend and girlfriend. What would be done to change the status of it

They really, really wouldn’t. Most people over the age of 16 understand and acknowledge the concept.

But - we don’t date, we don’t spend time together, we aren’t exclusive, I don’t love him and presume he doesn’t love me, no plans for any longevity or taking the arrangement to a romantic level.

And, with respect, if you don’t understand it you can’t presume to tell me the inner workings of my sex life.

FWB is most DEFINITELY not a relationship.

I have a FWB, I don't have the time or space in my life for an actual relationship. We are good friends who find each other attractive and both enjoy occasional sex. beyond our meet-ups for sex we see each other no more or less than I see my other friends in only the same environments and settings. I like him as a friend but we do not love each other, there is not commitment or exclusivity and we have no plans for a future or romance or development of how we are together.

if you @lornar123 would be happy in a relationship like that, then I think your view/understanding relationships might be more flawed than your judgement of other people's sex lives.

No my understanding is not flawed. Ive seen how a number of so called friends with benefits scenarios play out. Prima face there is no difference between them and people in a relationship other than that they claim to have no "feelings of love" for the person. They often do though IME.

You don't have to plan to marry the guy for it to be called a relationship.

The sex is amazing, so something about the guy is amazing too, but you just don't want to admit it. It's like you love the cock but not the man it is attached to. Meh.

It's like saying i

The sex is amazing, so something about the guy is amazing too, but you just don't want to admit it. It's like you love the cock but not the man it is attached to. Meh

By George I think she’s got it!

Ive seen how a number of so called friends with benefits scenarios play out

Oh well if you’ve SEEN it with your friends then nobody can possibly do it differently...

I know I don’t love him. If he tells me tomorrow he loves me then it’s over. It really is that simple.

Oh and something about the guy is amazing? Sure, he’s hot. Still doesn’t equate to love though.

Ah but Jacques, no because the cock and the man it's attached to are not dependable are they. But I bet it's not just cock that makes the sex amazing, I think you must admit that the guy had many attributes that float your boat, but you are pretending he doesn't.

Dependable = separable. And the sex can't be all that if you don't care whether you do it again or not. Perhaps you are assuming that there are a plethora of guys who could all do exact what he does just waiting for the nod ? Unlikely.

I think you must admit that the guy had many attributes that float your boat, but you are pretending he doesn't

I just said. He’s hot. That makes sex good. Why is that so hard to understand. I mean I hate tennis, can understand why other people like it to borrow your bizarre analogy.

And it really isn’t hard to get no strings sex.

As an aside I sent him the link to this thread. He’s very amused by you Lornar123

So this hot guy with whom you've been having amazing sex for the last 4 years disappears off the face of the earth tomorrow and you don't even miss him a tweeny bit ? Oooooooohhhk

So this hot guy with whom you've been having amazing sex for the last 4 years disappears off the face of the earth tomorrow and you don't even miss him a tweeny bit ? Oooooooohhhk

Fantastic. It’s only taken countless messages of the same point for you to get there.

Yikes jacques, that’s quite cold. I’d feel a bit sad if the shopkeeper I see every week disappeared off the face of the planet... I mean, fair enough you aren’t in love with him, but you do like him a bit do you not? If you’re FRIENDS with benefits? Even friends without benefits mean rather a lot to me.

Yikes jacques, that’s quite cold. I’d feel a bit sad if the shopkeeper I see every week disappeared off the face of the planet... I mean, fair enough you aren’t in love with him, but you do like him a bit do you not? If you’re FRIENDS with benefits? Even friends without benefits mean rather a lot to me

The only way to respond to crazy hyperbole. What Lornar123 is aiming for is me to say “sure I’d miss him” and then profess how she was right.

But yeah, I’d be sad if anyone disappeared off the face of the earth. I’m not in love with any of them either

I mean, all this “FWB is not possible” guff is tedious, right?

Oh I see!

FWB relationships definitely exist and work well for some people. It doesn’t mean you’re either in love or completely indifferent to them.

Stonebake

What is actually more likely than the “disappear off the face of the earth” nonsense is one of us says “actually, I’d like to stop”, or he meets someone he would like to be in a relationship with.

THAT is what I would be absolutely fine with. No sadness, no regrets.

Aw I’d probably miss him a wee bit. Wouldn’t mean I wanted to be in a relationship with him though.

Not that I’ve ever had a FWB relationship, but I’ve felt that way when male friends have started relationships which mean I have to see a bit less of them. Doesn’t mean I don’t want them to go and have a good relationship, but I have missed them a little.

That’s cool Stonebake. As I’ve said all along on both threads, the important thing is that a situation is right for you.

But that feelings aren’t ascribed to others.

I don’t pretend that my arrangements would work for everyone. But it’s absolutely the right thing for me.

I suspect that once this one is over, I’ll find a similar arrangement. I’m comittedly single so it’s the perfect option for me.

Yes, you’ll still find sex somewhere else. It’s relatively easy for most people to find someone for no strings sex ime. But you wouldn’t miss seeing less of your friend? Aaaah or would you just still see each other as much but without the sex?