AIBU to wonder why people always do this on MN?

[SquirreledIn]

I'm talking about people who always suggest the opposite of what the OP asked for?

Example: Can anyone please suggest some old fashioned names for our baby girl? We don't want her to have a name beginning with B but any other letter is fine.
Other user. Bethany? Bella? Bailey?

Or someone asks what they should order from the Chinese. There's always someone who says make a salad. It's much healthier.

It happens with holidays too, in fact almost every topic. Someone will ask for restaurant suggestions in Tenerife and some bright spark will say. I don't know. I've never been. I wouldn't touch the place with a barge pole. I only ever go to a lovely little gite in Provence.

Why do they do this? Do they really think that they're being helpful or are they just trying to be unpleasant? I'm leaning towards the latter most of the time. Ok, perhaps in the first example they just didn't read the OP correctly but I so often see posts similar to the other examples and it's frustrating.

Hahaha Bluntness. I'll never forget in my early MN days when a poster was asking if she WBU to tell her DH he can't go on a stag do to Las Vegas when she'll be 38 weeks pregnant even though he was the best man and organised it. Someone suggested that the reason he picked Vegas, that any man picks Vegas, is to sleep with prostitutes when I posted saying actually my DH went with a professional poker player friend for a few days, to keep his friend company but mainly for the musicals and shows, I got my arse handed to me. What a deluded little woman I am - men don't like musicals he's there's for the shags innit. (Although they wouldn't say this if they saw how excited he got at Phantom of the Opera )

Am I pregnant??

How about you do a test instead of posting on MN.
HTH

@StaffiesandPonies I hate that too. I stopped reading the comments under Guardian advice columns because about 80% of all the responses were from men who had worked themselves into an indignant froth about what imaginary people would have said in imaginary situations. No actual advice, just competitive rage.

Some people have a close relationship with the wrong end of the stick.
If they are anything like my mother, once they have superglued themselves to the wrong end, they run with it.

@GraceMarks so much this. If anyone ever asks whether a certain shop's clothes are small or generously sized someone will always pipe up 'huge, enormous. The size 6 drowned me' so anyone buying their normal size feels like a massive fatty

When someone is having a problem with a neighbour, there is always someone who pipes up with "I don't understand why you wouldn't just go round and tell them to stop".
My next door neighbour got into an argument a few years back and solved it by shooting the other man with a home made gun so I am not inclined to just call round and make complaints. I know this is an extreme example but the lack of understanding that there are irrational, violent people in the world is flabbergasting.

Yup. And the ones that make a chicken last a week. And eat very little.

I do recall someone actually posting they should have Male and female versions of dishes in restaurants because women couldn't eat a whole restaurant serving. It's just too much food you see.

You shoild always pay your exact share of the bill, and not just split it, because only greedy bastards who drink all the wine and eat all the pies want to split the bill equally so they can take advantage of their mates.

And don't get me started on make up, shaving your legs and high heels.

If you wear make up you're vain and lacking self esteem.
If you don't you don't care about your appearance
If you wear high heels you're only doing it because you're lacking any form of intelligence and pandering to Male fantasies.

And the shaving, if you shave apparently it's as unfeminist as it gets, you have been brainwashed by men and wish to look like a child. If you don't shave em you're gross and disgusting. No win there then,

And the thread where people were exclaiming it was perfectly fine to walk about with your pubes hanging out your swimwear, and if you looked at said pubes, then you were the problem. Not the pube displayer, oh no, they were behaving normally. Any woman who didn't want to have her pubes hanging out her swimwear was some form of brainwashed, conformist, man pleaser.

And then there is the whole,,my neighbour is naked in front of the window.dont look at that either if you don't like it brigade. 🤣🤣🤣

Just saw one..

OP: What do you think, mums?

A: What about dads and childless people, are they allowed to answer?

Yes Bluntness - and the ones where if you say you have so much as an eye bath full of wine a month you're a raving alcoholic, but if you don't provide a full bar with cocktail menu for visiting relatives you're a parsimonious fun sponge Scroogey McScroogepants.

Oh yes the booze Pearl clutching,

And talking of parsimonious portions

"My mother in law serves us one roastie, a tea spoon of veg and shares a chicken between twelve of us, we are all starving".

Someone always comes along and says " well that's a healthy portion and you don't need more calories you greedy bastard, if you want to pig out do it at your own home"

🤣

@Willow2017, you made me laugh until o cried. Thank you! I have a 3 month old with an earinfction, I have not laughed for ages. Thank you

Aww
Just doing my job ma'am.😉

Hope baby is better pdq.

Yes the wine threads can certainly attract some extremists. I'm not defending over consumption of alcohol but I really hate the scaremongering posts where someone comes on and says that their SIL used to have two glasses of wine every night with her dinner, maybe three at the weekend, and she died of liver failure.
I saw someone post something like this on another forum a couple of weeks ago and when someone queried it, it turned out the woman was also a diabetic who was taking some medication that didn't mix well with alcohol.

This is the funniest thread I've read in a long while

Oh Christ the vilification over alcohol here is one of the worst things.

I.e. I had too much Prosecco and embarrassed myself at my works Xmas party, should I apologise/how will I face work on Monday?!

All you get back is "do you always drink this much?" "YABU for drinking too much Prosecco especially if you have children" "have you thought about counselling for your alcohol problem"

An embarrassing drunk story thread on here would be quite entertaining, but it would never get off the ground.

AIBU : we are going away for my mum's 70th to Benidorm next year as she absolutely loves it there. We are planning flights and my brother wants to get an early one, 6am, as it's cheaper. But we have young DC and would rather go a bit later and pay more to have less grumpy kids! My mum is saying we all have to travel together but my brother won't budge. We are all paying for own flights. So AIBU you just book our flights and let them crack on?

MN: YABU to go to Benidorm it's bloody awful. Is there nothing available in Cornwall... travelling with young kids on a plane is awful. I wouldn't be going unless it was Cornwall of course.

Or you get the polar opposites on drinking

"I have maybe 4 glasses of wine a week in the evenings is this tol much?"
^*OMG you are drinking yourself into an early grave. Do you have kids? Then how could you subject them to a mum who.is pissed 4 times a week?"^

Then.

"My dp goes out twice a week with his friends and stays out till 3am geting rat arsed on cocktails. I think this is ott as he is not fit for anything until lunchtime. Aibu?"

^"Of course you are he needs his downtime with his mates. Getting pissed is natural and won't do any harm. Stop being so controlling."^

4 glasss of wine over the course of a week

“My MIL visits every week, doesn’t get in the way, leaves before she outstayed her welcome and is generally polite and kind to the the DC” AIBU unreasonable to leave the kids with her. My mum looks after her every other hour (but that bit comes as a dripfeed.) or my other favourite “just stick it on a credit card” 🙄

To be serious, for a moment, one of the things I recall is there was a thread which asked which was the one thing you saw as a luxury you couldn't afford, and the overwhelming response was booze.

I always wonder if that is part of what's driving the hysterical posts.

Otherwise mumsnet is full of hairy legged, pube exposing, teatotal woman, who seldom eat, or conversely think six donuts is a portion size, who never answer their doors and shout fuck off at random strangers a lot,🤣

@Bluntness100, and they never use a bog brush either because bog brushes are disgusting and unhygenic.. They would far rather don rubber gloves and remove it manually.

YY to alcohol frothiness!

If an OP asks if they should be ok to shovel a whole Victoria sponge down their gob every night of the week, they're told to go for it, don't conform to the modern idea of beauty etc etc. But if you have more than a thimble full of wine once a week you're a closet alcoholic.

@lucisky or they discolour it with bleach, because if you can’t see the shit it doesn’t matter that it’s still there

What gets my goat is all the ‘grow a pair’ posters who are either far too direct in person or have an overactive imagination as to quite how assertive they’d be when faced with an awkward or tricky situation.

The prudes,

AIBU to want my husband to pleasure me as much I do him when we have sex.

Pearl clutcher: There's a sex board for this kind of thing.

Gunpowder, yes, a glass or two of wine a night! You need to seek medical intervention, neck six donuts and you go girl,,,,