AIBU to wonder why people always do this on MN?

[SquirreledIn]

I'm talking about people who always suggest the opposite of what the OP asked for?

Example: Can anyone please suggest some old fashioned names for our baby girl? We don't want her to have a name beginning with B but any other letter is fine.
Other user. Bethany? Bella? Bailey?

Or someone asks what they should order from the Chinese. There's always someone who says make a salad. It's much healthier.

It happens with holidays too, in fact almost every topic. Someone will ask for restaurant suggestions in Tenerife and some bright spark will say. I don't know. I've never been. I wouldn't touch the place with a barge pole. I only ever go to a lovely little gite in Provence.

Why do they do this? Do they really think that they're being helpful or are they just trying to be unpleasant? I'm leaning towards the latter most of the time. Ok, perhaps in the first example they just didn't read the OP correctly but I so often see posts similar to the other examples and it's frustrating.

YANBU. Reading comprehension is not some people’s strong point.

OP: should I let my 10-year-old DD walk to the shops alone?
Next poster: how old is he?

God the how old are they ones drive me nuts. I see a poster ask how old they here and think hang on am I going crazy I'm sure I read ages 4 and 6. Then I reread the op and I'm not crazy other people just can't read!

Just spotted another one I hate! Op posts a new thread. Someone responds with haven't we just had this thread ? As if every member of the website should trawl endlessly and memorise it all!

YANBU!!
"DH is Hindu and I'm Scottish, we're looking for a Hindu name that works in both cultures, obviously no Muslim names as that would be considered odd by his relatives".
"I knew an Asian girl called Zara whose sisters were Maryam and Aisha- I thought that was pretty. I like Sayed for a boy".
This one comes up all the time with Sikh and Hindu naming challenges. Seriously, if you don't know the subject, don't comment!

I think sometimes people just like to join in with the chat. (Like I'm doing now.) Humour can also be a factor.

People do make the ages thing harder though by giving school years. Someone starts a thread about their DD in Yr5 and I have to work out, ok, So reception you turn 5. So 5 more years after that. Ok, we're talking about a 9 or 10 year old. Why not just say she's 10 to start with?

It's like

Can you recommend what I should make for a dinner party, we are all vegetarians.

How about chicken casserole?

Haven't you read MN recently? Apparently they're all vegetarians now, even if they sneaked a Maccy D on the way home. So go ahead and serve them steak tartare, it'll be fine.

SpoonBender got it in one

But what really annoys me are the pile-ons when someone accuses the OP of saying - or failing that, meaning - something they didn't say at all, and then others join in with "oooo yes, it's disgusting isn't it"

And all over something that was never said in the first place

Totally agree with you OP. Ive seen it so many times!

Actually, I posted a while ago looking for suggestions for low sugar cereal ideas for my 1 year old. Most replies were helpful and sensible, except for one poster who replied things like Frosties and Coco pops!

Or someone posts, for example:
Hi all, looking for suggestions for family meals. DS doesn't like rice, eggs or bread/toast:

Replies:
Risotto
Kedgeree
Omelette
Scrambled egg on toast
Boiled egg on toast
Poached egg on toast
Egg sandwiches
Egg curry and rice
Etc, etc

My absolute favourites are those that pretend to be completely ignorant of thoroughly mainstream things.

OP: ooh I really fancy a McDonalds tonight, what’s everyone’s favourite Maccies order?
A: what is McDonalds?

Or one I saw recently, paraphrased...

OP: how long does everyone spend on their phones? I’ve realised it’s longer than I thought, would like to cut down
A: I’m still using the £12 credit I bought 15 years ago. Oh wait? Do you mean a smartphone?

It's been mentioned before, but someone posts (in the doghouse) that they want a puppy, a small breed, but don't know what sort, so seek advice. They will usually be given the suggestion of a greyhound or a staffie from a rescue, because no one should buy a puppy as all sellers are puppy farmers in disguise.

Agree. Then there is the 'guess how many people I have shagged?' camp, and the 'I spent £900 on a handbag' brigade, who come on here with their outlandish claims, and boasts, KNOWING it will get a reaction.

Then they kick off and have a go at people when they call them out on it, slate them, and judge them for it.

I’m not a fan of “this isn’t an AIBU, posting for traffic!”
If it’s something I consider important (because I am the police of MN!) then I don’t mind.
But generally - stop it! Go to Chat.
It’s not like Chat is a dead zone!

Op, I'm really struggling being a SAHM I love my dc but I'm climbing the walls, should I return to work?

Poster: I love being a SAHM it's the best job in the world couldn't imagine going back to work and leaving Destiny and Theodore they are my world I adore them.

Fuck off Tina.

I attended some training on public engagement, and the first thing the trainer said was never to forget that about 15% of adults in England are functionally illiterate, with a reading age of 11 or less. Once I started running engagement sessions, I came to the conclusion that was probably correct.

While I don't think Mumsnet is as bad as the public as a whole, there are a lot people out there who genuinely struggle with reading comprehension. (Also some in a rush, some trolling, and some who, for their own reasons, want to make other people feel bad.)

Having trawled the children’s books topic looking for recommendations I have seen tons of threads that go

OP: Can anyone recommend books for my dyslexic 11 yo dd? She struggles so I’m looking for books that are short and not too challenging but not babyish.

Next 30 posters: Has she read “Jane Eyre” yet? My dad loved it when she was about 9/in year 1/still in utero

Always Jane Eyre

Or
OP: We live in a small house, the kids share a bedroom and keep fighting and the neighbours are abusive. I don't work and DH is on a low wage.

Comments:
Have you considered, moving to a nicer area, moving to a four bedroom detached house, sending your kids to private school, getting a better paid job, planting a magic money tree in the back garden?
[grins]

emoji fail....

I once posted asking for advice on estimated time scale for a garage conversion when we were moving house. Someone replied telling me in their opinion garage conversions looked odd unless we extended above too. Wtf?! For what it’s worth that had already been done by previous owner, so useless comment on all counts.

It does all provide some entertainment though

Another favourite of mine is when a hurt or upset OP mentions slightly irrelevant information (like one often does IRL if having a conversation, especially when upset) and they get piled on for it (whilst other posters missing the point and not answering the question). Example:

"I'm shaking, I just got on the bus and a big fat man started calling me a cunt just because I was taking a while finding change in my purse. He threatened to cut my throat. No one on the bus did anything, I just got off. Should I go to the police?"

Response: "what's being fat got to do with it? Would it have been ok if he'd have been thin? Not cool OP"

Aaargh yes...my very least favourite are the comments on threads for advice about non sleeping older babies and toddlers and there's always someone who has to say...'oh, well my babies slept through 7-7 from 1 day old so that must be really hard.' I don't want your pity...I want to read actual helpful posts.

Have you considered, moving to a nicer area, moving to a four bedroom detached house, sending your kids to private school, getting a better paid job, planting a magic money tree in the back garden?

Oh I love those posts! I saw one like that today. Ridiculous.

There’s one going about a vegetarian not having any options on a steakhouse menu and so many people have put “there MUST be options, check again”.

WHY WOULD SHE HAVE STARTED THE THREAD IF SHE HADN’T CHECKED????

Sorry for shouting but it drives me fucking crazy.

On the Baby Names board you will usually get suggestions unless you specifically say “I’ve narrowed them down to these three, so we don’t need any more suggestions”. If you’re vague about it like “what do you think of these?”, people don’t want to bluntly say “they’re all foul”, so they say, “How about Anna? I prefer it to Arseface”.

What really bugs me is when an op will post a usually distressing account of some life-trauma and it is raw and some dickhead, usually at least three, will say, ‘sorry couldnt work out what you are saying because there are no paragraphs.’ Followed by, ‘it is very difficult to understand because there are no paragraphs.’ Really? really?!

Clearly thet are ignoring the op’s obvious upset just to be goady about how the op’s standard of English is much lower than theirs, when actually all they have done is show themselves to be a bit thick and a lot of a dick