Not remembering how many people I've slept with?

[fifithefoof]

Was on the other thread about do you wish you've had less or more partners and wondered whether others can remember exactly how many people they've slept with.

Is it horrific I can't! Not that I've forgotten any as much as I stopped counting!

I'm trying to make a list and think it's at around 30-50!

Is this an unusually high number! I didn't think it was but on the other thread it seems most people are at around 1-5!

Sex is wonderful and I'm looking forward to having a lot more of it just don't tell what I'm allowed to use as criteria for a mate !

I said it would be arrogant of me to assume that I would be different to them and I wouldn't want a partner who could have sex so easily

So how come my partner settled down with me and I with him? We both have multiple previous partners. Neither of us have cheated on anyone ever, but both of us have been cheated on.

Past behaviour can be an indication of future behaviour but people can change.

just don't tell what I'm allowed to use as criteria for a mate

Nobody did. But maybe don’t instruct other people on their sex life in return?

Just a thought.

It's all a bit gaslighty, what do I not get to have boundaries?

I'm not instructing anyone I beg your pardon am giving my opinion.

It's all a bit gaslighty, what do I not get to have boundaries

Honestly what are you reading

Can’t help but assume you’re vocalising your own insecurities rather than highlighting issues.

It's all a bit gaslighty, what do I not get to have boundaries?

I don't know what you mean? Are you suggesting that we don't have boundaries?

Past behaviour can be an indication of future behaviour but people can change.

No. You've said if someone has lots of sexual partners it's likely they'll cheat.

Nothing to do with past behaviour.

I'm really starting to think you're deliberately trying to wind people up.

Fifi that's a complete misrepresentation and you know it. Show me where I sadi that?

Oh for fuck's sake. Look literally 10 posts down where I illustrated it the last time you asked.

I believe the previous sex life of my partner is none of my business. It's previous. Thank God. (yup I'm putting that this way). It should remain that way. Thank God. You don't remember. Your actual partner is relevant enough. Some people go in therapy to try to forget some scumbag(s) - male or female. People shag, people shag but you need a number of both sex to get it done innit ? Society will still look down on women. You just have to look at all the vocabulary used towards women livin da life versus men. I would not encourage someone to disclose this kind of things. When something related to intimacy becomes a number, it is a problem. Here me out. I would think : You have met some jerk for one. You have been cheated on for two. You have yearned for intimacy with people who did not respond. Absolutely incorrect politically. Well let's speak the truth, what would you say to the young you ? A number increases this type of encounters. A number is not your story. Delivering this is saying something that cannot be said in a nutshell. I refuse to "own" you this way. I'm happy for you, by the way.

I don't want to be the next notch on the bedpost of a guy who's shagged half the town and that's my perogative. Get over it.

You might interpret my comments as "Fifi will cheat on her husband" bit thats clearly not what I said at all

How on earth does my sexual history as a single person have any possible bearing on my future behaviour in a marriage?

When I was single I had sex with whoever I wanted to if the circumstances were good. Now I am married I only have sex with my DH.

I have never and would never cheat on a boyfriend or DH. That would be immoral, disrespectful and hurtful, none of which descriptions can be applied to my sexual past as a single.

I don't want to be the next notch on the bedpost of a guy who's shagged half the town and that's my perogative. Get over it

At the risk of repeating myself for the 3728383rd time, nobody has said anything to the contrary.

You get it over!

You're the one that's single and us sluts are the ones in happy, committed relationships! We must have done/ be doing something right!

I don't want to be the next notch on the bedpost of a guy who's shagged half the town and that's my perogative. Get over it

That's grand, stick with the type of men you've been going with then.

I don't want to be the next notch on the bedpost of a guy who's shagged half the town and that's my perogative. Get over it.

If you were shagging there is no way you would know...

You're the one that's single and us sluts are the ones in happy, committed relationships! We must have done/ be doing something right!

Oh don’t be ridiculous. You’re getting defensive and spiteful.

And anyway, I thought some pps witg high numbers were (happily) single.

Just because you’re part of a couple, you aren’t automatically right. What a shallow and stupid comment to make.

And I’m happily married fwiw.