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AIBU?

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Not remembering how many people I've slept with?

999 replies

fifithefoof · 09/10/2018 13:07

Was on the other thread about do you wish you've had less or more partners and wondered whether others can remember exactly how many people they've slept with.

Is it horrific I can't! Not that I've forgotten any as much as I stopped counting! Confused

I'm trying to make a list and think it's at around 30-50!

Is this an unusually high number! I didn't think it was but on the other thread it seems most people are at around 1-5!

OP posts:
Stonebake · 11/10/2018 15:23

“Great. This thread was for women to talk about sexual experiences, which is an empowering thing to do in a society which still slut-shames left and right, and the trolls have derailed it and effectively shut women up and are preventing them form sharing their experiences.

The MRA's have once again won. Congratulations, shitheads.

Why can't you leave us women alone to do our own damn thing once and while? Why must you always be the center of attention?“

If you mean me, I can assure you I’m a woman and have been on MN for years. Feel free to ask mnhq.

And this thread was not “for women to talk about their sexual experiences” was it? I thought it was AIBU to not be able to remember how many. I said yanbu pages back fwiw. But the conversation has moved on from there and some people stamping their feet because not everyone is falling into raptures of ecstasy because they’ve had eleventy million sexual partners.

BrightonGallery7 · 11/10/2018 15:23

Trolls?Hmm

BrightonGallery7 · 11/10/2018 15:24

People do not have to concur with your world view. Clear?

BrightonGallery7 · 11/10/2018 15:26

Eleventy million!!😂

Frogletmamma · 11/10/2018 15:27

OMG you must be sore!

BrightonGallery7 · 11/10/2018 15:29

🤣@Frogletmamma

JacquesHammer · 11/10/2018 15:30

Fwiw everyone is free to use whatever criteria they like when selecting a partner, and if that includes their sexual history or what it's like you to have been then I see no problem with that

I agree.

I do however have an issue with it being used as a tool to judge someone who you’re not about to embark on a relationship with as some people have done on this thread.

seeyouhen · 11/10/2018 15:38

You can't just take one part of your life, put it to one side and say this says nothing about me and you are allowed to decide whether you want to be in a relationship with me because of it. That's not how it works

Most people don't need to know about their new partners previous sex life. I know you won't understand this as you said yesterday that you would be jealous of any partners previous sexual history. Your partner also seems to enjoy making you jealous, telling you all about how great some of the women he had sex with were. Most people don't do this.

seeyouhen · 11/10/2018 15:40

If you mean me, I can assure you I’m a woman and have been on MN for years. Feel free to ask mnhq

MNHQ has seen your vagina???

AliasGrape · 11/10/2018 15:40

Exactly. Can you imagine if some bloke from some tacky reality show or somesuch started boasting about the fact that he'd worked his way through an entire hockey team. Would posters on here be giving him high fives and saying 'good for you'.

I mean, society already celebrates such men plenty, so they’d hardly need my high five star but yeah, if a male friend of mine, within the context of an open and supportive discussion about sex, told me they’d had a large number of partners and that everyone involved had enjoyed themselves whilst practicing safe sex I would think good for them. I wouldn’t celebrate it as such, but I’d see no reason for them to feel ashamed so no double standards here.

Stonebake · 11/10/2018 15:42

Grin maybe they have... Oh! Do I get a high five? Someone’s seen me vag lads Grin.

Ahem... sorry, I’m being a bit silly. No, I meant feel free to check I’ve been on here for a while and they won’t have any reason to think I’m a... what was it you called me? Oh yes, MRA, troll shithead.

lornar123 · 11/10/2018 15:42

Someone used the phrase "sexual etiquette" which seems reasonable. I wouldn't date someone who I knew had cheated and I expect you wouldn't either. So I wouldn't want to have sex with someone who treated sex as if it is nothing, I don't see what is wrong with that, sorry.

Stonebake · 11/10/2018 15:44

I’d see no reason for them to feel ashamed

Exactly the same for me. But I would stop short of celebration, just as you would. But there have been some congratulatory messages on here towards people who have had higher numbers of sexual partners. One poster I think said she’d “bow down to their superior knowledge” and another said “respect”. That’s what made me a little Hmm.

Stonebake · 11/10/2018 15:45

Oh sorry;

grin maybe they have... Oh! Do I get a high five? Someone’s seen me vag lads grin.

Ahem... sorry, I’m being a bit silly. No, I meant feel free to check I’ve been on here for a while and they won’t have any reason to think I’m a... what was it you called me? Oh yes, MRA, troll shithead.

This^^ was to hen.

JacquesHammer · 11/10/2018 15:47

So I wouldn't want to have sex with someone who treated sex as if it is nothing

But this comes back to the way you view sex.

I don’t see sex as “nothing” but I don’t also see it as always having to be an act in a loving relationship.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to find someone you’re compatible with on any level. But I do think it’s really important to try and not let painful experiences cloud things for you.

JacquesHammer · 11/10/2018 15:48

Stonebake

I’m not sure what context “respect” was used. However for me respect would mean respect for someone making informed choices and living as they wish rather than a congratulatory term on numbers if you see what I mean?

To me the number of partners is very much secondary to whether someone has/had the sex life they wanted and chose.

seeyouhen · 11/10/2018 15:51

lornar123

That was all discussed yesterday in some detail. You still cannot seem to separate cheating from people having multiple previous partners. I'm really not surprised, as I said yesterday your boyfriend has done such a job on you that you can't seem to separate these things because he's told you that cheating is normal.

Stonebake · 11/10/2018 15:54

jacques

I think it was something along the lines of, “wow a whole cricket or rugby team? Respect”.

BrightonGallery7 · 11/10/2018 15:54

seeyouhen

If you mean me, I can assure you I’m a woman and have been on MN for years. Feel free to ask mnhq

MNHQ has seen your vagina???

Human biology is not your strength.

MephistophelesApprentice · 11/10/2018 15:57

Envy is such an ugly emotion, but has produced a fascinating thread.

Stonebake · 11/10/2018 15:58

Elephant14

I'm 77 and remember getting a cricket team, then a rugby 15 team .. Blackpoolforever you legend!!

And

Yesterday 22:52 theworldistoosmall

🤣 somewhere between going on a mission to fuck all of London I did settle for many years and got married and stuff. So now I’m making up still for the married and stuff years.

Footie and cricket team. Respect.

Stonebake · 11/10/2018 16:01

Envy is such an ugly emotion, but has produced a fascinating thread.

So... everybody wants to have as many sexual partners as possible? So it’s not personal choice and “respect” for living the sex life you want? The goal is as many as possible. Righto.

seeyouhen · 11/10/2018 16:03

Stonebake

The person who wrote about the cricket team was only talking numbers, not that she'd literally had sex with the whole cricket team and a rugby team.

BrightonGallery7 · 11/10/2018 16:06

Envy!?!?!!🤢🤮

The above is the response. Not envy.

Stonebake · 11/10/2018 16:07

Yes I know hen. Sorry, I don’t see how that’s relevant? She was being “high fived” for her ‘number’ either way.

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