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AIBU?

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Original poster

To be angry with school

251 replies

Firsttimenamechange1 · 07/10/2018 20:19

Name changed just in case. Posting here for traffic.

A bit of background. After a few years of emotional and verbal abuse along with infidelity on his part, I split with my ex 6 years ago and we have a DD6. He used to sit outside my house everyday when we first split. (He has DD for 3 hours every Monday and Tuesday and EOW since the break up. )

I contacted the police on several occasions and logged the fact he sat outside the house along with harassment via text messages every week. I have moved address and not told him where I am (I do drop offs and pick ups to his to avoid him knowing where I live) and also taken out a new phone contract so I message him on my old phone due to the anxiety I feel when I receive a text from him.
He hasn’t paid child maintenance in 6 years and I finally plucked up the courage to contact CMS a couple months ago. He has missed the first 2 payments.

I told the school numourous times that I do not want him knowing my address and new phone number due to the past and I also made them aware the police have been involved and they have acknowledged this.

Today I received a text from him saying that he doesn’t want to go through CMS and the school has given him my new number and address so he will be contacting me on my new number. He then text me on it to prove this. I told him that is my work number and he is to not contact me on that.

I am now scared that they have also given him my address. I will be going down to the school office tomorrow morning and if they have given my details to him what can I do? I thought that with GDPR they can’t do this, along with the fact I have specifically told them I don’t want him knowing my details. Any advice would be appreciated x

OP posts:
Original poster
Firsttimenamechange1 · 15/10/2018 16:13

Hi all,
Quick update.

So I had a call from the person I spoke with originally (they also addressed me by the wrong name Angry ffs) and it went to voicemail - the call was made after school when I was driving DD home. Anyway, they said they have almost finished writing their report but just need to ask a few more questions so they can self report to ICO.

I called back and was told this person was away from her desk so I said I only wish to communicate in writing so I will wait for the questions to be emailed.

Am I right in thinking they know and have been told by their data protection officer that this was in fact a breach if they are self reporting or would they do this to be on the safe side?

Thanks x

OP posts:
Original poster
Firsttimenamechange1 · 15/10/2018 16:14

Thank you treezylover x

OP posts:
Loopy3585 · 15/10/2018 16:23

Under GDPR they only have 72 hours to self report to ICO so if they’ve waited this long they are already in breach of this. Clarify if it was reported to ICO within the 72 hours and these are follow up questions or if this is the first report being made. If they are reporting to ICO then yes I would imagine their data protection officer has been informed but again clarify it

allupsidedown · 15/10/2018 16:24

Wow, I work in a school and we are all completely paranoid about GDPR. I am appalled that they gave out this information. I would say they are now shitting their pants and trying to cover their backs but are realising they have to inform the authorities of the breach.
I am so sorry that you have had to go through all this.

t00dle00 · 15/10/2018 16:24

This is terrible OP.

Loopy3585 · 15/10/2018 16:27

The ICO usually come back with questions like how did it happen, what training had the person responsible had in regards to data protection, what procedures have been put in place to prevent it happening again, what policies do they have that this breaches etc. They will then decide what to do with the case from a fine point of view or if they just issue a warning

Original poster
Firsttimenamechange1 · 15/10/2018 16:30

Thank you Loopy.

I will see what they come back with. I assume it will be tomorrow I will hear back from them now.

OP posts:
KatieScarlett · 15/10/2018 16:47

I would contact your MP. The way they have ignored you is callous and self serving. They don't care about your safety, only covering their arse. Your MP can help, an email describing the issue and the schools actions to date will start the ball rolling. Make them accountable, this is disgusting.

pouraglasshalffull · 15/10/2018 17:00

If it is 100% the school that gave them the number then you need to contact the safeguarding lead and the headteacher and they should investigate how this happened. You are correct that this is in breach of GDPR rules.

If for whatever reason the school is isn't cooperative then threaten with legal action for breaching GDPR rules. Although any decent school worth their salt will take this very seriously

MrsBosh · 18/10/2018 19:15

Any update, OP? They are well over the time limit to self-report.
I keep thinking about this and feeling so cross for you.
Hope you and DD ok.

MaisyPops · 18/10/2018 20:31

MrsBosh
Call me cynical but I'm sensing a cover up and denial.

Original poster
Firsttimenamechange1 · 18/10/2018 20:44

Hi all,

Sorry I haven’t posted in a while. Have had a few viewings on properties etc.

I had an email from the data protection officer there and they have said that they spoke to ICO for advice and I had to respond to a few questions for them to go back to see if it was a breach.

I’ve done what I need to do. I’ve got an appointment with a solicitor to see where I stand as I’m really going to struggle financially.

I’ve had phone calls and letters through the door (anonymous ones but I obviously know who they’re from) and I have contacted police and logged it.

I’m trying my hardest to make sure DD isn’t aware of any of it as that is my priority right now - we’ll that and finding a new place to live.

OP posts:
MyNameIsNotSteven · 18/10/2018 20:52

Wow OP. Just awful Thanks

Willow2017 · 18/10/2018 22:58

I cant believe they sre still stalling op. Its not bloody rocket science.

Stay strong First you can do this and take them to the cleaners to pay for your move and all your other expenses incurred.

Mountainsided · 19/10/2018 09:58

So very sorry that you are not feeling safe where you live at the moment. I think solicitor is a very sensible next step. That’s not on that the school haven’t reported themselves still!

Original poster
Firsttimenamechange1 · 19/10/2018 14:20

Thank you for your kind words and comments.

I’m just mentally and emotionally drained from it all at the moment.

Hoping something good will come out of this meeting with the solicitor and I know where I stand as it’s felt like a waste of time talking to the school and waiting for replies so far.

OP posts:
Jlynhope · 19/10/2018 14:48

That is such a massive screw up, I am so sorry they did this to you. They should be shitting themselves because it's horrific.

MrsChristianTrevelyanGrey · 19/10/2018 15:15

Oh Op I'm so sorry you are going through this 

Don't give up though they need to acknowledge what they done was a massive screw up and help you however they can

Clutterbugsmum · 19/10/2018 19:27

When you move, I would set up a different Email address and PO Box for the school as you can not trust them to not put you and your dd at risk.

Stressedoutmamma · 24/10/2018 18:03

How are you doing OP?

Original poster
Firsttimenamechange1 · 24/10/2018 19:27

Not too bad thank you @stressedoutmamma I have my appointment tomorrow afternoon so I have everything I need ready.
Thankfully nothing has happened at the property (no more anon letters)
Put forward my interest into another property though.
Haven’t heard any more from the school either so just a waiting game... x

OP posts:
Stressedoutmamma · 24/10/2018 19:32

good luck tomorrow I've been thinking of you and your situation for the last few days. It shocks me how long this has taken for a meeting? Try and record it and they seem to be taking the p* and I would not trust them

Candlelights2345 · 24/10/2018 19:44

Oh my god, I’m so annoyed for you. It is a breach, your address and phone number are personal data and they have given that or allowed this to be given to a third party, it’s a breach of the principle of integrity and confidentiality.

FishesThatFly · 24/10/2018 19:57

The school are hoping that if they ignore you long enough, you'll give up and stop bothering them and it will all be brushed away..

DoveBlue · 24/10/2018 21:04

This is terrible. I have no specific advice to offer but just wanted to add that even if you don't feel strong you are coming across as a strong person who deals with things pragmatically your daughter is lucky to have you as her mum. I cannot imagine how scary and disheartening this is for you but be proud at how you are handling it.

Regarding the school my only advice is stay calm and measured but firmly inisting that they put everything in writing. Do not let their stalling and faffing put you off.